The frumpy girl
with dirty-blond hair sat in the back of the taxi. He legs were
too short, her face not remarkable enough. Not remarkable enough
to be the lead singer in a rock and roll band. Not enough to be
the canary for Missing Persons. But that's what she was. She
looked in her small make-up compact and evaluated herself.
"I just don't
got it'" she thought, "Whatever "it" is, I just don't got
She closed the
compact, adjusted all three of the scarves tied around her neck,
the blue on first, the pink one second, the yellow last because
it was on top. When they pulled up at the Roxy she got out, and
walked into the alleyway to find the back stage-door entrance.
She had a gig tonight.
She saw a
dark-haired girl about seven playing with a ball in the light
falling through an open kitchen door a few yards away. Her dress
was tattered, he shoes in threads. She looked to Dale to be
"A poor kid,"
she thought, and motioned her nearer.
she said, and taking the yellow scarf, she wrapped it gently
around the girl's, neck. Her eyes brightened.
Then she walked
into the stage-entrance door and disappeared.
The Haitian girl
caressed the yellow scarf. How could she thank the nice lady? She
put down the ball on the pavement and returned to the kitchen
door and went inside closing it after her.
wasn't home, so that was perfect. She would never allow her to do
such things even when she was there. She opened the drawer, and
got out a candle. Then she looked for some aluminum foil and
string. Finding them, she now searched for crayolas. Then she got
some scissors and cut a bit of string from a cotton mop her
mother used to clean the floor. She laid everything out on the
kitchen table. Now she was ready.
Inside the Roxy
they were having an argument. The band didn't have enough room to
dress in. Dale needed a separate space. The rest were guys, so
she needed some privacy. Finally it was arranged by putting a
rope from a pillar to the wall, and hanging a blanket from it,
giving her a kind of screen.
"A girl's got to
have some privacy when she gets ready!" she had screamed, so they
gave her her way. Besides, this was the eighties. The guys all
wanted to use her mascara and her hairspray. It completed their
eighties look. The drummer would have given her her way anyway,
he had many times before. He was in love with her. She got her
way, the screaming stopped, and all was forgiven.
In the kitchen
the Haitain girl started carving the candle with a knife. This
was her first time. She needed a model to copy, so she grabbed
her Barbie nearby. It had no clothes on.
alright," she said to herself, 'I'll make my own."
So the legs,
exceptionally long, got carved first. Then the boobs.
"I'll make 'em
just right," she said.
until she got up to the hair. Her Barbie was bald.
O.K." she said, "I can always make hair."
Back at the
Roxy, the guys were pleading for hairspray.
"Come on Dale,
we haven't got all night."
A hand appeared
near the curtain holding hairspray can.
Then it was,
"Dale, can we borrow your mascara?"
The answer came
back, "When will you guys finally get your own?"
But she handed
it from behind the curtain anyway.
In the kitchen
the girl thought the mop string would never do for hair.
white from the Clorox," she said to the doll, "But don't worry, I
can fix that."
She picked up a
blue, then a pink crayon and crushed them into the hair with her
foot, putting pink on one side, blue on the other.
Then she took a
piece of pink crayon that was left and twisted some on both of
the doll's cheeks for rouge.
"All most done
now," she said.
scissors and cut out pieces of aluminum foil and pieced them
together with string. Now she had an
"Only one thing
left to do," she announced to the doll proudly.
In the Roxy the
stage hand came to the door of the dressing room and
the guys told Dale.
Her voice came
from behind the curtain.
"You know,' she
said, "I hope there's a big crowd. It's been pretty slack. If we
can't bring 'em in, I'm ready to quit."
"Don't say that
honey," said the drummer, "they just want something different,
that's all. We just haven't found it yet."
"Maybe this is
it," she announced, and drew the curtain aside.
In the kitchen
the Haitian girl was putting the yellow scarf around the neck of
"You always need
something of theirs, something personal," she said, "Mama taught
She walked over
to the stove and turned on the fire.
In the Roxy when
they walked on stage, the drummer said, "What shall we give them
"Words", then follow that with "Destination Unknown."
Cindy Lauper who was sitting in the third row, Gwen Stephani, who
was sitting in the seventh row, and lady Gaga, who was sitting in
the twelfth row saw:
A girl of
exceptional beauty, with legs that started somewhere near her
neck, in an abbreviated costume designed by herself, with
bleached blond hair, part pink, part blue, belting out a song
with a delivery they'd never heard before.
Dale was the
original two-in-one girl. In herslef she combined two American
icons of sex.
She had the look
of Marilyn Monroe, and the vocal delivery of Betty Boop. Two in
took note of her Betty Boop squeal and pop in her voice. Gwen
Stefani noticed her bleached blond hair and her idiosyncratic
movements. She'd save these for later. Lady Gaga couldn't help
but notice her unique costume. She definitely picked up on that
and would file it for future reference.
In the kitchen
the girl was finished holding the voodoo doll over the flame.
When Dale had finished their numbers, she was told by the
"Honey, you were hot."
answered, "I felt like I was on fire."
They were going
to take a cab home as usual, but when they all added it up they
didn't have the money.
"We'll have to
walk, "said the drummer.
L.A.?" Dale Bozzio answered, "Nobody walks in L.A."
outside and found a cab waiting. Explaining they were broke, the
cab driver began to turn away. Then he gave Dale another
"Hop in Lady,"
he said with a smile, "I've got it."
"No," Dale said
smiling back, "I've got "it" I guess I always did