Monday, November 28--
Back to school again :p Today was fairly alright. I don't much notice the staring anymore, mainly because I'm too busy thinking about Adrian. And, damn it all, whenever i think of him, I beget the silliest grin. I got to see him two days ago, and he gave me his number! (screams inside) >< I was too excited to write about it, lol. Sorry, but now you know :} I waited until yesterday to call him--let me just say, waiting one whole day to call felt like forever--especially because I'm really into him... I wonder if he's even that into me...
Monday, December 5--
I haven't been able to stop smiling since Thanksgiving. And now that he has "my" number, he calls me too. He has even come over a few times in the last couple of days. But, we don't really feel comfortable--I mean, we do feel comfortable with "each other." It's just--Seth... He's constantly looking at us, and he lounges around the living room when me and Adrian are sitting in there...
Thursday, December 8--
I've got to get out of this house... Seth has been acting even more strange lately, and the weird conversations have started again. And somewhere in between all the nonsensical blathering today, he said, "You sound inexperienced, but you walk and move like you're ready to learn."
I was at first taken aback because we were talking about something else entirely... So, I laughed. But then he looked at me... And then, I knew...
Monday, December 11--
Adrian's mother would love to take me in, but she says she doesn't have the resources for it right now. And of course she asked my aunt about it--my aunt doesn't listen to a damn thing I say. She suspects that I wan to be closer to Adrian which, incidentally, is partially correct... I just want to feel safe. And, he makes me feel that way. It's like whenever he's around, he creates a wall of protection... Then, I don't notice Seth much at all.
Wednesday, December 14--
He stood at my door again last night, and this time he came in. I know it was him this time... because he was standing right over me when I opened my eyes... i stared at him for a second and wanted to ask, "Why are you in my room?" But no words would come out. So in the end, all that i could do was stare up at him--at him coming closer and closer to me. I couldn't react--I could hardly blink. He pressed his palms down on my pillow and he stared--beyond my eyes and into my soul... where a scared, little girl winced back at him. I was paralyzed under the weight of his body... I was too afraid to even scream--
I get chills just thinking about it--It's so surreal that I'm not even sure it really happened... I tried telling Aunt Kathy, but she won't listen to me... I think she knows it happened, but I can't be sure.