I can no longer look in the mirror. I can’t identify the person staring back at me, or maybe I never really knew her. She is the mere shell of a human being, simply a familiar face. She is an illustration of the past, a vague reminder of what used to be, what could have been. She judges me with her vindictive glare. She no longer wholly understands. Eyes wide, her gaze screams out violently, mocking my every choice, my regrets, my intentions and my mistakes. Her charcoal eyes no longer full of child-like wonder, but now singed with images of sorrow, death and despair. Her eyelids forever burdened with carrying the weight of his face, his incandescent, merciless, blue eyes. No longer does closing them offer comfort. The agonizing confusion worsens every time she searches for that barely recognizable peaceful place, where she used to play in the vast, innocent fields of hope. The incessant longing has stripped her of her humanity. It has demanded her sanity, her purpose, her soul. I’m unaware of how to end it and I fear that I am fated to carry this weight forever.