The next afternoon, which was wet and miserable, despite feeling ill, I took myself on a walk up and down Old Park Road. I was listening to some Stone Roses on my iPod, but this kinda depressed me, as The Stone Roses were one of the bands that soundtracked my time at college, and now all that was just a distant memory. All those good times, or at least the memorable times, had been omitted in favour of what I realised was a complete nothingness in my life. I mean, what was my future looking like? It was certainly less clear than a year ago. Sure, I was having some laughs with Tristan, and I'd be seeing a lot of Calum as well, but was that it? And deep down, I kind of knew that nothing would happen between me and Suzie, although I denied it to myself at the time, such was the strong feelings I felt about her. All I had was a depressing dead end job and these hangouts with Tristan were what kept me from being depressed. I'd still speak to Dan regularly, and Sean too, but Sean was less of a presence at this moment in time. One Friday night around this period, he rang me asking if I wanted to go for a drink with him and Josh at the Regent pub in Chapel Allerton. I was at a memorial service for a family friend at the Highwood Hotel in Brackenwood, but I said I'd meet afterward, and invited Tristan along. But Sean cancelled, so I ended up walking to Tristan's at about 11PM, and after accidentally ringing Calum's landline instead to the bemusement of Calum's dad, we just had a standard night of chilling. So Sean was harder to get in touch with.
The next Monday, I did another bus route, the 3 to the White Rose Centre, but I was bored of that route now. I'd done it so many times and I just couldn't feel the way I did that sunny Wednesday afternoon in November 2007. Everything just felt so different now, compared to the previous year. Once more I got the 12 home, and got off on Street Lane, enjoying a stroll home through the backstreets of Roundhay.
That night I met up with Tristan, and we decided to call on Thornton. We got to his house, and he answered looking rather beaten. "I can't come out, I've got to get up at five" he told us. "Why do you have to get up at five?" Tristan asked. "Because I have to get two buses to Park Lane in Horsforth and I have to be there by nine so I'm in bed now." "Yeah, but it doesn't take four hours to get to Horsforth, maybe an hour tops." "Yeah, but I also have to get up to do some work" Thornton then told us. "What, you're gonna get up at five in the morning to do some work?" Tristan smirked, clearly seeing that Thornton was bullshitting. Thornton reluctantly decided to come along with us, and we went on yet another little stroll through the Roundhay area, just walking around and smoking and talking shit to each other. But Thornton clearly didn't want to be there, and you could tell he was only there because Tristan pressured him into it by pulling him on his lying. When we were walking up The View, Thornton suddenly split from us and walked down the street to our right, which led to Lidgett Lane, without saying anything, headed home. "Oh, whatever!" Tristan sneered. "Go home then!", before saying to me, "What a fucking fag."
It was about half past ten, and the date was 15th December 2008. Exactly a year prior to this, I was in Pudsey at Elliot's party. I was getting to know Suzie, and Suzie was trying it on with me, which led to me completely falling for her. I was experiencing one of the most influential moments in my life, one of the moments which I still remembered vividly. Things just seemed so optimistic then. Not just the Suzie thing, but that I was at college, surrounded by flamboyant characters. My life was so eventful in December 2007. Fast forward exactly a year, and here I was, wandering around the streets of Roundhay aimlessly with Tristan, with no idea what my future would bring. How much had changed over the space of the year.
And things had yet to take a turn for the worse.