UNDER THE DIM LIGHT
I am Amelia, 43 year old housewife. I have a loving husband and 3 kids, a very happy family, indeed. But in such a bliss, Just 3 hours ago, because of a huge mistake and misconception, I ruined my life, my long-time ever so wonderful relationship with my family and the life of an innocent, young boy...
I was walking down the street, about 4 pm. It was such a great day, as my eldest daughter told me about 1pm, as she reached the house, that she’s in the top of the class. And my son also had great news for me, he had been appointed by the coach to be the captain of their basketball team. Because of happiness, I promised my kids that I would serve them a very special dinner, and called my husband in the office to come home early. Lacking in ingredients, I decided to go to the market to accomplish my plan.
I was just heading to that bridge when a kid, a dirty looking kid, wearing scrappy clothes, bumped at me. I was a little annoyed because the path was wide enough for two people, or even 4 to be able to move freely without having any physical contact. But because I was in a good mood, I just let it pass.
When I reached the market, I quickly grabbed all the ingredients that I needed for my recipe and then walked towards the counter to pay all that I picked up. All the items have been punched and counted and I turned to my bag to get my wallet. I ran my hands inside without looking, but I didn’t find my wallet there. I got a little nervous but chose to stay calm. I then switched my eyes inside my bag but still didn’t see my wallet. Probably in my pocket. I thought. Then searched in my pocket.
“Hey, are you gonna pay these, or what?” the clerk was getting irritated of me.
I looked at her then swallowed hard, I didn’t want to be humiliated, but it was a bit obvious that, that girl wasn’t friendly at all, if you got no money!
“I’m sorry Miss, but my wallet is missing.”
“WHattttttt? You want me to pay for that huh? You have the guts to pick all those stuffs and tell me you ain’t got no money in your pocket? What a mess...”
“I said I’m sorry! Okay?! Someone stole my money...” Right then, I immediately thought about that kid who intentionally bumped me... Shit! You sonofa... what have you done!!!
“Oh yeah? Well, you’re wastin’ my time Ms. No Money. Next please...” and then the next customer who also had seen the incident, just pushed me aside and grin when he saw my face.
I got out of the market and swore I’d never buy to that lady again. As I was heading back home feeling so stupid, my plan was all ruined plus I’ve been humiliated, my vision just started getting dark. I was so angry, and if only I could see that child, I’d surely put my hands around his neck and squeeze it.
Then a few distances away from the market, I saw the kid walking, carrying a good, fresh milk fish on his right hand and a bag of canned goods on his left hand. I burst in fury. He totally stole my wallet. If not, where could he get the money to buy all those?
I quickly ran, following the kid, but he must’ve noticed me so he also started to run and tried to get away from me. Because he was carrying a load and only had short legs, I managed to grab him by his hair. His stinky oily hair! He was unprepared for that so he fell down on the floor and all the items he was carrying scattered everywhere.
(What Amelia didn't know was that the boy was just asked by his mother to buy some food, for the mother has fever and would surely faint if forced to get up. The boy and his mother are very poor, and the mother only gets that much money when people generously buy her hand-made floral necklace made of sampaguita. The mother gave almost all her money to the boy to buy their food for the two of them to have enough because she doesn't know until when her condition will remain as is... meanwhile...)
I used the opportunity and hurt the child so badly. My fingers that were so long completely dipped deeply on his skin and my big hands that were used to doing heavy works were used to slapped and punch his tiny body. My feet also did their job and kicked the child almost in every single part of his body. He was pleading while tears fell from his eyes because of the pain...
“Please stop! Why are you doing this to me? I don’t know you Ma’am.”
“You don’t know me? You just stole my wallet and took all the money! Do you know how much humiliation I’ve been through huh?! I’ve never been in that situation my whole life!”
The kid was weeping. “Ma’am, believe me, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I am innocent. Please it’s very painful!”
“Liar!!!” I didn’t want to hear any of his words. I knelt and grabbed his neck, squeezed it as tighter as I could! The kid was shouting for help but his voice became lower and lower, until nothing could be heard. Then the people started to surround us, that was when my ‘right mind’ came back, and as I blinked my eyes again, I saw my hands encircling the neck of that poor boy.
I stood up and tried to run but a police officer grabbed my left arm before I could do, and then put handcuffs in my wrists. I couldn’t find my voice, couldn’t speak a single word. The police persuaded me to talk and explain what happened. But my eyes were just focused on the body of the 7 year old kid. Realizing what I’ve done, I cried! Oh Lord! What did I do???
Ambulance came after 15minutes and a male nurse studied the condition of the boy, he was found dead after so many trials of getting him back to life. I couldn’t believe everything! Any of it... If it was a nightmare, I’d do everything just to wake up and have my simple happy life back to me, again. But then, it was all true.
And now, I’m sitting here in front of the police chief trying to explain and remember what just occurred from the time I encountered the boy up to the point when I murdered him with my own bare hands.
“Can... Can I please talk to my husband first? I really need him here.”
“Oh please do! But I assure you that after your husband knew what happened, he’ll never show up again.” The chief officer says. I don’t like to pay attention to him as I don’t want to invite anymore of this, or else, I’ll surely lose my consciousness in any minute. I dial the phone number in the house and after few rings, my husband answers the phone. After saying ‘hello,’ he quickly recognized my voice and talk without my signal.
“Honey, where are you? We’ve been waiting for you, the kids said you’ll be preparing special dinner for us but I think it’s too late to do that. It’s okay if you can’t make it. Just come back home.” After 2 seconds, my daughter gets on the line.
“Hey mom, I found your wallet on your bed, so we knew you really can never buy anything without your money.” Sweet laughs. “Anyways, it’s okay mom. Let’s just order- ” I hang up the phone.
I found your wallet on your bed... found your wallet on your bed... found your wallet on your bed....
Words that keep on echoing in my ears, right that moment, I don’t know myself anymore. I killed the innocent boy and I let myself be used by the force of evil, and so I knew that from that day on, I’d have to live under the dim light.
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