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Two mobsters have a discussion on their way to dinner, they discuss business, politics, and eggplant.

WARNING: Contains strong language, whiners beware.


Submitted:Aug 1, 2012    Reads: 89    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   


New York City, July 31st. 2012

Toni, the passenger, and Sal, his driver were heading to Little Italy for a bite to eat, Toni was in his fifties with graying hair and his driver was a much younger man in his thirties with a full head of black hair, both were dressed casually and fit. Both were high-ranking guys in one of New York's five mob families.

"You hear about what happened over in Jersey?" The driver said.

"Yeah, fuckin' farmers. Glad we don't do business with them. Can't trust them." The passenger said.

"They think the guy with the hair did it. The little guy who lives by the park." The driver said.

"He always gave me the creeps, him and that Lon Chaney stare. Looks like he sucks the blood of children." The passenger said.

"I hear he's been dealin' with the cartel though, the reason I brought it up, could be a problem." The driver said.

"Yeah, those Columbians, they ain't gonna' do nuttin', we got the ports, not them. Lefty may want to work with them, him and that dysfunctional disgrace of a family of his. I ain't gonna, got some livin' to do. Fuck 'em if they think they gonna' use our ports." The passenger said.

"I don't know, they maybe a bunch of scumbags, but the money they make off that powder is unbelievable." The driver said.

"But you get more heat than a bonfire if you get involved in that shit, might as well go broke than die in jail on a drug charge." The passenger said.

"I hear ya' Ton', but it's still worth thinking about." The driver said.

"I'd rather think about Lorenzos, I'm hungry. You gettin' the Eggplant again tonight?" The passenger asked.

"Yeah." The driver said.

"That's all you fuckin' eat, you gonna turn purple like that dinosaur they had on TV a while back." The passenger said.

"That was a childrens' show, Ton', you know, for the kids." The driver said.

"Yeah and you'll get a spot on PBS if you keep eatin' that stuff, you hear about what happened with Chick Fil'A?" The passenger asked.

"Yeah, who hasn't. I think it's a shame, we are a free market, you can give money to whoever you want." The driver said.

"Yeah, fuckin' disgrace, turnin' into a third-world country. Left wing hippies, they want to put a bunch of people out of work because they don't agree with the boss, seems like a metaphor for this whole country." The passenger said.

"What?" The driver asked.

"Anytime someone has a beef nowadays, they don't blame the individual they have the beef with. They take it out on the whole bunch, hate chicken my ass. Has a gay guy ever been tossed out of a Chick Fil'A? If that happens then yeah you have a case, if not well then you've got nothin', you wanna' put a bunch of people out of work because of where the boss puts' his money, some who have families to feed. The media is egging it on as well, bunch of parasites. It's like the gun control nuts, the guy who commits the act is considered a victim but law-abiding citizens are the ones who do take the heat for his crime and lose a chunk of their rights. Take their guns, take their chicken, give them a shitty health care plan and let those crooks in Washington handle things, they fucked up the post office and you can bet on them destroying our health care system." The passenger said.

"I hear ya' Ton', the whole country is just coming to a big bang of an end. No values, no honor, no nothin'." The driver said.

"If that Romney doesn't get the job, we are done for. Finished. But yeah, Americans don't give much of a fuck anymore, they'll vote Obama back in as soon as he starts promising free health care and housing. They'll be broke and unarmed, the last bullet they'll fire is into their foot." The passenger said.

They arrived on Mulberry Street, Lorenzo's wasn't that full.

"Think I'll drop by Chick Fil-A tomorrow, you gonna' come?" The passenger asked.

"Yeah, of course Ton'. Gotta' show your support." The driver said.

They start heading towards the door, Sal driver held it open.

"Think I'll get eggplant tonight." Toni the passenger said.





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