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What is Love in First Sight? Psychologically

Article By: sitting ponderer

This article is all about love with a psychological perspective. This thing might be new to many of you guys out there. I didn't give this theory; i just wrote it in my way. Hope you guys like it. Please do comment on it.

Submitted:Sep 27, 2008    Reads: 903    Comments: 5    Likes: 3   

Love is a feeling which feels like you've just been hit with a rock. Or at least that's what one of my friends describe it :p In this article I'll describe the psychological aspect of love in first sight. Now remember, if you've got a high temper please don't proceed. Also remember I am ONLY talking about love in first sight here. This article is only WRITTEN by me; I learnt about this from a book by a famous psychologist M.Scott Peck.

When we see someone attractive, as in love in first sight, we immediately fall in love. Our conscious mind starts to care about him/her and we judge in a spur of moment that he/she is the one. Let me tell you the truth here: It is just a sexual attraction. Our conscious mind takes it as love; whereas our unconscious, which is the REASON we liked him/her, actually likes the sexual aspect. Many of you might be thinking that this is just another wrong theory, right? Let me ask you a logical question:

How can we judge another person by just looking at him/her when we are unable to judge properly our very own friends after years of intimacy?

The problem with love in first sight is that, when both individuals fall in love with each other, unconsciously they've created some expectations for the other individual. When they are married, after a while, the reality starts to settle in. This is the time when they REALIZE this fact that he/she isn't that perfect as he/she thought. This creates a lot of problem. At this point they might separate or otherwise work on their marriage. This is the point when actual love starts to happen.

You might be wondering what that "high" feeling in love is, right? Keep reading

When we are born we don't have any sense of individuality. We feel as if we are part of the very world. This feeling goes on until the age of 2; after that we start to feel as a separate dependent being. It is this point that a baby needs the most love, because this love will nourish him and help him in his future.

Before a baby is of 2 he doesn't have any "Ego Boundaries". Ego Boundaries are simply limits that our mind realizes. You know you can't bench press more than 50 kg; this is a "limit" which your mind has realized. These limits are physical and mental. To put it in a simple way these are the sets of rule which your mind has which you can't bypass.

The thing is that when you fall in love with someone, you actually let her in your "ego boundaries". Remember the limit thing I told you about? When you fall in love you break open that limit and let her in it. This process is called "cathexis" in psychology, and you" cathected" her. The reason you feel high is because when you were under the age of two used to feel that joy and all. But one doesn't forget that joy. So when you cathect someone, you start to feel the same way you felt when you were a toddler: You lose your identity and feel as if he/she is a part of you.

The above might've looked like a "useless theory", but if you keep your own biases at one side and look around you might just find that it is indeed true.


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