Save on all your Printing Needs at!

The Undecided

By: ana jester

Page 1, For my friend, Sean...

He has been a great friend, but somethings keep getting in the way. I met him about a month or two ago and it was only to discuss film ideas. But what can you do when it evolves into what you'd consider, romantic? He has been noticing that I'm drawing away from him, but he still tries.

"You seem so distant," he told me yesterday. What can I say?? Well, I met a guy named Aaron. We went out on a date two days ago, and he is my boyfriend, but should I tell Sean? Yes, I should, but I'm so afraid of the outcome of it. I know that he likes me, he told me I'm his interest. At one point though, we began to argue, fight with words about guys I talked to. He treats me as if I'm his girlfriend, i know I'm not. I wasn't sure what to do, what to say when he'd try to argue with me. Should I give up and leave Sean alone completely? Or should I still talk to him; he is a friend after all. I know he tries to impress me by saying certain things and sending me songs he sings. And each song he sings seems as if he's sending a message to me. Or is that just my imagination?

He likes me more than anything, I'm just afraid to say or do anything. All I see him is as a friend and co-worker(we both work in his movie productions). At first, he was the one to tell me that we should just be friends and co workers. What happened to that?? Cause now he only sees me as someone he wants to be with. And here I am, undecided on what to do. Aaron is an amazing guy, he's funny and hasn't attempted to argue with me or complain about me talking to my guy friends. While Sean and I argue off and on.

I don't want to hurt feelings or be hurt... I only wish I knew what I should do. Soon, Sean wanted me to move in with him and one of his friends, around September. And around then, Aaron will be attending college. Which leaves me to wonder: will Aaron forget about me? Will he cheat on me? Should I live with Sean? And Aaron mentioned that he'd need a roommate to help him with an apartment. Hinting away there.

Sean gets mad-upset with me now and then, he reminds me of Alex in my story Life Without Alex. It's almost the same, as long as it doesn't have the lifethreatening moment to it. Yes, Aaron is my boyfriend,but I won't use the word Love yet, at least not until he seems okay with it. And Sean is still an amazing friend to have...

I just don't know what to do when he makes his moves and tries to prove that he'd be a good boyfriend.

"You don't seem to like me no more," Sean texted yesterday.A secret that I'm keeping is the fact that, I like Sean, I just don't think it would work out if we were to get together. We argue too much. Out of anger one day last week, he messaged,"This is never gonna work..."

"The movie thing and friend thing?" I asked.

"Everything," he sent back. He wants us to be together, I just don't know what to do. I'll know soon though, because Aaron already seems distant to me, but he doesn't think I'm distant to him. Either way, it's a problem that most girls face in their lives: you have an amazing boyfriend/girlfriend, but you know your guy/girl friend has strong feelings for you too. Which do you choose? You don't want to let go of an amazing guy/girl who finally shows up in your life. But you also don't want to lose the one friend that you share secrets with, you don't want to hurt him/her feelings. You don't want to crush your relationship with either one, and you don't want to break hearts. You love them both, but it's difficult.

Sean cares for me, yes. Does Aaron care for me? Don't let go of anything, but who is more meaningful to you?

A guy/girl you just met not too long ago? Or the guy/girl who has been there for you as long as you can remember?...

© Copyright 2015ana jester All rights reserved. ana jester has granted theNextBigWriter, LLC non-exclusive rights to display this work on

© 2015 Booksie | All rights reserved.