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Suicidal Entities: A True Story of Suicide Prevention

Novel By: Jenalie Stanson
Non-fiction



This is a true story of my journey from almost committing suicide to a health facility. Just remember, truth is sometimes stranger than fiction. View table of contents...


Chapters:

1 2 3 4

Submitted:May 14, 2009    Reads: 57    Comments: 4    Likes: 0   


~1~

Time of Dying

����������� It was a Sunday morning that I woke up to. The morning was bright and the birds chirped in the early May sunshine. I didn't know that the day would take such a terrible turn. I had no idea where the day would lead to.� I knew my parents had gone out to Deadwood, the third famous place in the world to gamble away all of your money. They went quite often, gaining some and losing all. I guess that's how it generally works out.

����������� I sat up and yawned. I hadn't gotten to bed until one in the morning. I reached around and felt that my short brown hair was all tousled in the back. Great. My first thought that came to mind after my bad hair day was to call my friend, Matt Raedan. He'd been a really good friend to me for almost two years. I grinned as I remembered what happened on Wednesday. Little did I know that it would drive me to the desperate levels of Hell and beyond.

����������� I got dressed quickly and brushed my hair out with hopes of flattening it. It didn't work so I pulled all of my hair into a ponytail with bangs hanging out on the left side of my face. I ran to get the phone, ignoring my brothers as I dashed back into my room and dialed Matt's number. I smiled as Saving Abel's "Addicted" came on. It was Matt's ringtone especially for me. It was all too appropriate.

����������� "Hello?" Matt said after a break in the music.

����������� "Hey! Guess what?" I asked in a suggestive tone that I had learned to acquire.

����������� "What?" He asked, completely clueless. He sounded like he had just woken up. I glanced at my bedroom clock: it was only ten in the morning.

����������� "My parents are out. I thought it would be a good time to hang out," I said with a hint of laughter added to my voice.

����������� "Really?" he asked, interested now.

����������� "Uhuh, really," I repeated.

����������� "I just woke up...I think I'm supposed to go to Austin's house. I missed his birthday party last night," Matt said, sounding disappointed.

����������� "My parents are gone until noon...that's all the time we need," I said. Austin was a friend of Matt's. I didn't really know him, but I wasn't going to let Matt pass up an opportunity like this. After all we'd be inside.

����������� "Ok, let me call Austin and figure things out. I'll call you back, ok?" Matt asked.

����������� "Yeah, that's fine," I said in a voice smooth as honey.

����������� "Alright, talk to you in a bit."

����������� "Yeah, bye."

����������� "Bye." The phone went dead.

����������� I smiled to myself and pranced around my room. I'd get to see my Mattie! Yes! Well, that was the problem. He wasn't all mine; he was just a friend with major benefits...and a friend who happened to have a girlfriend. I clenched my fists, squeezing the phone until it slipped out of my hand and fell onto the floor. I had to stop doing that, I thought as I picked it up.

�The thing between me and Matt was a small window of opportunity until he had to settle down and be a "good little boy", quote, unquote. Ha. Ha ha. Isn't that the funniest thing you have ever heard? My best friend, Felicia, certainly didn't approve of the situation between me and him, but it's not her call.

����������� Matt and I had been close since we first met almost two years ago. His girlfriend, Hailey betrayed him and cheated on him more times that I can count. I had always been there for him and had expected nothing in return. Sure, I liked him and even loved him, but I knew nothing would come out of it. His heart was hopelessly stuck on Hailey. So, I have had to watch them be together, off and on...but the best thing was that a couple of months ago, I told him about my feelings. I told him that I loved him. I wasn't in love. I just loved him. He told me he had the same feelings for me. Then he told me to kiss him while I had the chance. And I did. It was heaven on Earth. I went home that day feeling fulfilled and happy.

����������� But then, I wanted more.

����������� A week or two later, Matt came over to my house and we messed around quite a bit, getting farther and farther along. A week later, in a little cove in the woods, I gave him my virginity. That was four days ago. Four, long days ago.

����������� �I began to pace my room, the feelings of love and lust so strong, it nearly made me sick. Every time I thought about that place in the woods, my stomach turned. It was in a good way, but it still made my stomach turn. I looked at the clock: it was ten-fifteen. He sure was taking an awful long time talking to his friend. Perhaps today would be another good day and hopefully my parents wouldn't come home and catch us in the act of anything...yeah...I'm not usually that lucky. Out in the woods, no one saw, no one heard and no one knew but Matt and me. That was good enough as it was.

����������� I thought about Hailey and how she had absolutely no clue that I was seeing Matt. I didn't go to the normal high school anymore because my grades were really poor. I now go to a place called the Academy where you work on one or two classes at once. My G.P.A. shot up from a 19 to a 3.7 in less than a year of working my ass off to achieve A's and B's. Anyways, Hailey had no way of knowing unless someone told her. I was paranoid at all times. The only two people on the planet who knew besides Matt and I were my best friend, Felicia and another friend named Shannon. Shannon knew Matt and Hailey both, but he swore to keep everything to himself. I warned him that Matt was gonna kick his ass if he said anything...he shrugs it off every time.

����������� I looked to the clock again. It was now ten-thirty. I sighed and sat down on my couch and smirked. My couch...what a lovely place to be. Suddenly, the phone rang in my hand and I jumped.

����������� "He-llo?" I answered.

����������� "Hey," it was Matt. He sounded wide awake now.

����������� "Yeah?"

����������� "I've got a better idea," Matt said devilishly.

����������� "Really? What's that?" I asked, interested.

����������� "Well, everyone's leaving my house for a while. My dad told me I couldn't go anywhere, but you could come over to my house," he said.

����������� "Oh...um..." this was going to be hard...I didn't want to be caught with him and I didn't want to be caught not home either.

����������� "Well, Sammi?" Matt asked. A shiver went through me. Matt was the only one allowed to call me that simply because I'd dropped that name when I went to the Academy.

����������� "I guess. I'm not really allowed to leave my house either. They never said anything directly to me. But I guess I can 'take a walk'."

����������� "Alright. That works," Matt said.

����������� "Can you come get me?" I asked.

����������� "No, I don't want to risk it..."

����������� "Half-way?" I asked. "Please?"

����������� "Ok, I'll meet you at the bridge," Matt said.

����������� "Alright. I'll be there in five," I said.

����������� "See you then," Matt said.

����������� "Yep, bye," this time I hung up. I grabbed my hoodie, my MP3 player, put on my shoes and headed out the door. �





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