I sat with my face in my hands, staring at the clock. Tick tock, tick tock, the time passes by on the clock, on the clock.
Another day passes, when I sit alone once again. The only sounds with exception of the clock which tick tocks, is the rain, which once again rains outside.
My tears, they begin to fall, my sobs growing tall, and yet no one hears.
Why? Oh I distinctly remember, when all of us, the members left, and when I began to fret. It haunts me so, it is irrationally silly.
I could see all of you, out of the blue, and on cue, left me to say, 'boohoo!' and want to go to school.
Why do you all begin to shun me? Possibly, eventually, indefinitely, and yet possibly, you all come back to becoming my companion.
If only I wish it were a short journey, for then we will all meet~ meet with voices of the happy.
That passion, where has it gone~ where has our years long gone towards to.
Do you hear that sound? The sound of a crack? The one one which is ticking, beating, crying, and bleeding? Yes, it is my heart, crying with blood as it still beats itself alive.
Am I still alive? Or am I empty shelled? Our friendship fell, because of something swell, though it weren't so much well either.
That school, which could've accepted us; it was just imagination and lust to go there. Here, we all don't see eachother.
You all see disgust in eachother, can we not be together?
My tears, it can be heard by the birds, though they've gone. It could be heard by my companions, though they've gone. You, the very source~ the one I could count on~ the one with the strong sounds, have gone.
The heart is beating with sadness. I cry and cry, can you please at least try? Try to get back together, and cooperate with eachother.
Why do you give me so much pain; how lame are you? I apologize, for my attitude is straining, and numbing.
Why do you hurt me so?
Please, don't go.
One again, I sit alone with my head down, consoling, thinking, and crying.
More tears are collected in a jar. I feel trapped in a jail cell, hearing the bell, to tell me to go to Hell.
I'm not ready to say goodbye, goodbye hurts.
When are farewells beautiful, for they are full, of despair, something not many could repair.
I thought you would support me, when those who should love me, don't. All of you lied; lied through your teeth; lied through your promises.
Why? Why do something like this? Do you believe missing me is a bliss?
Do I deserve unhappiness? Tell me, tell me!
Give me reasons, for is it because I gave treason?
I believed we were bound, by the sounds, to not betray. Guess I was proven wrong, how long how long, do you plan on being away?
Is the school more valuable than one's feelings?
I remember quite well, when your hands touched me. They were warm and soothing, comforting, and relaxing. I remained calm because we were friends, all of us will remain friends. I believed it.
I never thought about goodbyes, because my sighs pushed it back. Intact, not my sanity.
My heart is slowing down, and I remember the class clowns, us. We never did much afterwards, because all of you were being forward, straightforward with others.
I became jealous, for I prefer you all to dote on me, like a sister. Please pay attention to me; I have never felt doted on.
I shouted, I screamed, I yelled, all never worked, for I know how this group of yours worked.
All became lovers with eachother, and I became more lonely, lonelier than you.
I didn't sleep, I didn't eat. Why not? Because my choice was not to. Food was a waste on me, and sleep is too precious to be used on me.
You said so yourself; don't sleep if you won't, and don't eat ifyou won't.
Like a good friend, I will cause myself to fall to an end, so my years worth of compensation will be lent.
Keep my tears in a pocket, for I will never know when I will let it, let it out. Shout after you cry, it helps.
I wish I didn't do something so foolish, but I just can't seem to care. Nothing in life is fair, realize that. You can't change people, only yourself, and let themselves be. What about me?
I changed my habits drastically, and practically~ practically lost.
Never will you see, for your hate is yet to be, ceased.
Years have passed, and I asked, many many times, 'should I finally take that lime?' because from what I know, it is healthy.
Yes~ my condition is improving, rising, and coming into being.
Odd, because nothing seems right. My throat feels tight, a burning feeling which chokes in my throat. I decide to myself, the lime may not be a okay thing.
Continuing on for many years, I stopped crying tears. All my friends are never changing, and will be hating, hating eachother for as long as I will know, for as long as they throw, insults at eachother, with slight activities involving eachother.
Tears are wasted, friends are wasted, food is wasted, sleep is wasted, exercising is wasted, writing is wasted, watching is wasted, listening is wasted, life is wasted.
For once, I fell asleep, and never had it felt nice. For once, the floors doesn't seem to be cold as ice, and my head is clean from lice.
I cannot eat much except for rice, and brown is not my favorite.
Many years later, I carry on a smile. For a while, it trasitions from genuine to pretend~ soon, all genuine overpowers pretend.
My sleep is improving, and soon enough, I feel happy, happy with the life I possess. My own life is most important, so it is the best. I must continue on without some, for I feel the need, to read, and sleep.
Sleep, that sounds good. I am so tired. I am a bit hungry, but I am more hungry.
I sat down on the couch, laying, closing my eyes, a pouch in my hands, Claires the brand. Yawning, I keep persisting in staying awake, soon falling asleep. Sleeping, the best medicine.
I was happy.
I wish it was with you.
Because of all I want to be with, it's you guys.
May happiness be with you.
Get enough sleep, because you'll see me then.
Please stay healthy.
Let's be friends forever.
We'll come back from the short journey.
Goodbyes can't be forever, they can't.
I wish you could all take pants, with you.
I may need a pair or two.
Precious, malicious, and beautiful dream.
Carry me into their dreams, so the light may beam,
beaming brighter than ever,
loving eachother forever.
Never, never, never, ever, leave our side, stay forever.
Absolutely, mostly, I will remain happy.
Hugging, kissing, and loving eachother,
like the old times.
Father, mother, brother, sister, we are all family,
consider that with certainty,
that eternal sleep brings it that mood.
For once, I require many food.
Please stay by my side. Please don't go. Please don't fight, you can tell I am uptight.
Just be friends.
A/N: As You Can See, I'm Not Very Good At these Stuff yet. I'm practically new to it. Please enjoy it as much you can. I don't want to disappoint you guys.
It isn't good because it's a jumble mix of feelings. I know, so difficult!