I look out the window from my wheel chair into the snowy realm. It was so perfect, glistening white flakes falling from the heavens above the blanket the ground. That snowy realm that I can never touch again. In Chinese folklore-there is a 1,000 hand goddess. She has a hand on each hand and sees everything-from grief to joy, from despair to confidence. The goddess reports all she has seen to the dragon king. Then why can she not see the tears that track down my cheeks? I’m dying of cancer, going under the current and losing the fight. My heart hurts so much. I don’t want to leave this life, I want to live! I shouldn’t be afraid, but desperation grips me at every turn. I’m only 13; shouldn’t the dragon king give me a chance to live out my life fully? There’s a whole lifetime for me! Yes, I am selfish. So bad am I, I would condemn another person to this condition if I would be rid of it. I’ve always taken my life for granted, never appreciating my parents or the choices I had. Bitterness fills me, now I realize. Now I realize how lucky I am to have had such a life. I turn my head back toward the window, staring at the snowflakes pressing against the window. How alike we were, the snowflake and I! Our lives were so short. One warm breath would melt the snowflake. I pressed my face against the window, staring at the snow that blanketed the ground. It was strangely warm. The snowflakes flitted around like faeries, delicate things to die anytime. My fingers itched to open the window and let them in. I wanted so badly to feel the snow against my skin again. I summoned all my strength and pried the window open wide. Everything was so quiet, quiet like on a cold winter night. Things started turning blurry and dim. I trip against a stack of books and fall into the snow. The landing didn’t make any sound either. I smiled; I didn’t mind. It’s a fairy tale come true, a wish granted. It’s not cold at all; instead it feels so warm and cozy. The world seems like a billion light years away, and I don’t care. All I want to do is sleep in my fairy tale. I’m so tired, so tired…………………..