The Way I Am
Growing up, I was the worst child ever. While growing up, I didn't have much to do that involved me, actually being good. At the age of 11, I smoked cannabis for the first time of my life, and I now suffer the consequences for continuosly doing it. I have stopped smoking in general for about 2 months. My girlfriend and I have made a promise, stating that I were to never cut myself, burn myself, anything to do with self-harming, a long with smoking. I like to keep my promises, because it feels good to be trusted. At the age of 13, I overdosed on many different medications. For example, my ADHD medication, Vyvanse. Vyvanse has many side affects, which aren't exactly the greatest. These side affects include; Shortness of breath, severe chest pains, hallucinations, weakened muscles, blurred vision, and many more. The recommended dose that I took, was one pill. I took 6 everyday. I also overdosed on my schizophrenic pills. (Mellaril)
Along with taking these pills, it comes with many other different side effects as well. Such as; Slow heart rate, uncontrolable shaking, seizures (very rare), more pale skin, and many more. I have moved on from taking drugs. I think I am better then that now, before, I didn't know If I was or wasn't better than that.
Outside of the drug range, I was quite a bit of a shit starter through out my elementary years. I was a tiny kid back then, where I was constantly picked on for multiple years. I wore cover-up (foundation), to cover up my horrible acne, because everyday, the same kids picked on me for how I looked, so I decided to put my foot down, and tried to make myself look have decent. Of course, applying cover-up, did not help my situation at all. I was made fun of for that as well.
During the grades, 7 and 8, I lost it. I was absent for more than half the entire school year. I did not attend, I did not think it was worth going to school when people constantly made fun of me for who I was. Now since that I am in high school, I'm kind of regretting not showing up for class, because I don't know that much about what I did in grades 7 and 8, I was rarely at school. When I did show up for school though, I did not do anything. I fucked around with my friends, didn't give to shits about what work needed to be done.
Suspensions. I have been suspended ... A LOT. I guess you could say I was quite of a dare devil before I matured up a little bit. I don't know how many times I have been thrown out of school, but I know for a fact, that it was more than 30 times. I've been suspended for throwing erasers at walls, walking out of class randomly, expelled from the second school I attended, Monsignor Philip Coffee, for lighting my desk on fire. I then, transferred schools. At that school, I was suspended for taking the teachers car keys when he took my cell phone. That was a little crazy-stupid. I got suspended for grabbing the teachers phone out of his hand while he was talking to the office. The conversation went something like this. "Andrew, go down to the office, I'm calling down now". I replied with, "You aren't calling the office, I am". While he was calling the office, I snatched it out of his hand, and accidentally dropped, and broke the phone that was connected to the wall in our classroom. I have also been suspended for walking home early, choking people, being to intimate with my girlfriend on school property, (Ex-girlfriend) For coming to school intoxicated, For coming to school high, for talking back to the teachers, for disobeying the teachers, for bringing pornography videos to school, for skipping school, for not attending school, at all period, for throwing shit at people, and many more.
I think I have moved on from my past. I would like to start over fresh, and move on from the mistakes that I have done. I'm sorry to all those that I have hurt, emotionally, and phsyically. You did not deserve any of my stupidity, or rudeness. I apologize deeply.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.