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a time alone

Miscellaneous By: bshydin
Other


me


Submitted:May 10, 2008    Reads: 37    Comments: 0    Likes: 0   


another day, to a other time, i lay alone with my thoughts,, a view of what i see of me,,, my time away from others,, here i sit with my mind wondering, a silent place with no sounds around, just my breathing to comfort me,, thoughts of how the last years have been, people i`v met and ones i let go,, at the beginning i found myself in harms way, slowly getting through each day, entering the night life to forget, being around others to take my mind away from my feelings, engaging with life with others, visiting people who are the same as me and remembering the ones who are above , my time to think of who i am, my friends i`v made and the ones who visits this site, with the e-mails each day i read, with my reply with respect, to the university of Tokyo, as a student writes about me, for her own behalf, the places i`v been,, an the doctors i`v talk to and my ( angel ) i met, days seem weaker and changes are happening, my writing feel less important,, as others say it is,, my time alone with responsibility to get better, my thank you to those who taught me what life is about.. seeing smiles from young children, and the strength from mine,, January 11th will be 3 years of my life of being who i am, the lessons and failures gave me a goal to win,, my watching of others and helping ones cope with their lives, being there when i`m needed,,,, my time alone to gather strength to carry on, waiting for something new, i`m going again for another test the day after my birthday, i will take another way to prolong my life, to enjoy more mornings as i awake, so i`ll begin a new joy of my wonder, much has happened over the last few weeks, staying home to rebuild my self being, giving myself attention and looking beyond road that i`m on, traveling in between work to pay my respect to others, replying to mail that i get from ones that want a little hope, my time is taken up with a lot of other types of joy,,,, but not thinking whats the best for me, its hard to analyze the right way i should go about this, i sit thinking for hours, take long drives to be alone with myself, ask myself questions that i try to answer, meanwhile my life is still here for me to live, there's many things i pushed away, things i need for me, shutting my eyes going back in time, letting each day slowly pass through my mind once again and finally saying i feel happiness in me,, i will carry on and do what i`v been doing, enjoy all what i see, be there for others, say what i feel, my time alone gave more power to overcome what ills me,,,, my envy of the days ahead,,, the people i`ll talk to and the miracles that are happening to me,, a road with more miles to go down with the warmth of my own heart,, remembering the beauty of what i see and my tears of joy for being here, for my time alone to heal,,, for my time to think about me,,,,, lost in mind at times , with no worries in me , i`ll take ahold whats best for me,,, my walking is slower to feel whats needed as the ray of the sun guides me to my place in time,, letting each of my thoughts open more intensely for other to hear,,, a time alone to remember who i am.




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