I write because I want to empty out the thoughts that sink in my head. I write because it feels like I’m expressing myself, even if I don’t show it to anyone (Which is usually the case). I write because I can feel free, and I don’t have to worry about how anyone thinks about me. It is just me putting all my thoughts and emotions in front of me, as if no one is there to judge.
Some people, (ie: Parents, teachers, annoying people) think that you can express deep personal thoughts with music. Now, if people can actually achieve that, then I’m happy for them. However, I could personally never do that. When I still enjoy something that’s good to listen to, I can never express myself. And don’t judge me, I have tried. I really have.
I play an instrument called a viola, which is pretty much a violin except bigger and no-one knows what it is. I have lessons every Friday with this teacher that says I put no emotion in my music. Then, when I really try to emphasize whatever emotions that this composer was feeling at the time, my teacher stops me, and tells me that a note is out of tune, or that my bow hold just wasn’t quite right. I then concentrate on those two things, and then again I have no emotion. So as you can see, it goes in a circle.
You see, what it is with music (or more like, playing music) that it is completely unoriginal. What you play, is not yours and you have to capture the feeling that the composer was having whenever he wrote that song, even if they’re long dead and gone. Even if you’re writing music, you will then give it to someone to play, who will play it with fake emotions. Emotions that are merely borrowed. And dots and lines really, aren’t emotions. They’re just notes.
However, writing us universal. It doesn’t have to be re-created, it can just be created. And you don’t have to worry about bow hold or posture, because to get the message all you have to do is read. Emotions are expressed, but not fake when read. Instead, when you read, you actually feel emotions within the story.
And it is not like writing is difficult either. It is just your language, written down so that everyone can see it. You don’t have to learn anything new, all you have to do is tell us what you’re thinking. It is simple, and does not need endless amounts of practice either.
And so, to conclude, I like to express myself through with writing. Expressing throough music, though, I have ti say that I find confusing. I just don’t get it.
So, how do you express yourself??