"The roof the roof is on fire! We don't need no water let the
mother fucker burn!"
Both Ian and Alex yelled at the top of their voices. Ian pointed
an invisible microphone at Alex.
"Burn mother Burn!" He yelled at the top of his voice.
"Burn!!" They both yelled together.
They sang it two more times before giving up, exhausted. Alex
sighed as he leaned back on the tiled roof they'd chosen to sleep
"You know… Do you think about hell?"
"What kind of question is that? Why do you plan on making a
"No man… it's just this IS someone's house you
Ian looked at the flames that engulfed different parts of the
roof they lay on. "Well it's not like there's anyone inside" Ian
"Did you check?"
"Nope... Look you could think about this, for people there either
is or isn't a god. So that drops your chances down to fifty
"How that work?" Alex asked weary of the story that was coming.
"Well you see it's like this there's an undeniable verse in the
bible that says everything is on earth as it is in heaven. So if
it's fifty percent down here then it's fifty percent up there."
Alex stared out at the flames for a while before answered.
"Fifty percent will feel like a big number in hell" Alex mumbled.
"You didn't let me finish. You see it starts with that fifty
percent then you add in all the different religions who all think
other religions are Pagan think any people associated to them are
heretics right? That's the Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists
"Aren't they the same thing?"
"Who gives a fuck? Anyway then there's the Jews and
Scientologists. I know what your thinking and your right
technically they don't count but all the other religions think of
them as heretics. And Alex those are just western and eastern
religions who've given all African religions the almighty fuck
you. Right? That cuts your chance of getting it right and going
to heaven down quite a bit right? Well not to think about the
churches which are different. And why go to a specific church
unless you thought the others were wrong? See it getting
ridiculous now isn't it? Now that includes the churches in all
the separate religions. See now according to those chances you're
fucked right? And the worst part is that it isn't your choice
isn't it? It's your mother or father who really decides. So your
'given' your religion and then when your old enough to really
choose you've been eating so much shit for so long that you're
opinion of anything other faith is warped isn't it. So in the end
you're only choice is to see the 'light' your head had been
forcefully twisted to see OR you become an atheist where a shitty
end is guaranteed for you."
Just then a part of the ceiling fell through behind them. Neither
Ian or Alex blinked.
"Let's go" Ian said jumping off the roof. Alex stayed on the roof
and pulled out a thin glass tube and poured a white see through
crystals it. Alex poured more on the pipe and put the pipe over
the flame. The crystals melted and Alex smoked the pipe. He then
jumped off the roof. Alex dropped more crystals into the tube and
passed it to Ian with a lighter. Ian took a pull on the pipe
then carried on walking. They were they 3 blocks away from the
burning house when the first fire truck appeared. "Took long
enough" Ian snorted taking another pull on the tube. He let the
smoke pour slowly out of his mouth. "Anyway" Ian said ready to
carry on ""I was talking before we left. Atheists or are
completely fucked because their guaranteed to get nothing, no
matter who, what or which religious thing is right. But!
Their better off, because they get to live their lives to the
fullest. Why? Because they know that right now, is all they have.
And for some, that's all they need and more than they wanted"
Alex nodded taking a last pull on his glass tube before passing
the whole thing to Ian.
"I feel like there's a flaw in your reasoning."
Ian raised his eyebrow and paused in mid pull waiting for an
answer. It didn't come…
"Well?" Ian insisted.
"Fuck Ian. I don't know what the exact flaw is Ian. But I know
"Sure Alex you believe what your poor warped and twisted soul
wants you to think. Hey you hungry?"
"Famished" Alex answered pulling on the pockets of his jacket as
steam come out of his mouth.
Just then a police car pulled up behind them and called them
over. Alex grinned at Ian and Ian nodded. The police man watched
them intensely and saw the drugs in Alex's hand and saw him
reached inside his pocket.
"What are you two-"
END of Part one