People have problems. That's life. But it's those
problems that could very possibly help save a life. Last
Saturday, I went to my "church" (I don't really go there
anymore), because they were showing a movie for the public called
"To Save A Life." I don't know exactly who went, there wasn't
that many, but those who didn't, TOTALLY missed
I have been struggling, for years now, because of something
that happened to me. I want to be able to be completely
honest with all of you. The reason why I would raise my hand and
come up for prayer every Thursday night here at youth, was
because from the ages of 5-12 my cousin molested
It didn't start out as that, because, I mean come on, I was
five. He started by just touching me in places I shall not
mention, and then it turned into something more as I got
For years I have been depressed and confused and
just…blah. I didn't want to talk to anyone or be around people. I
just wanted to stay in my room, think, cry, and think some more.
I was thinking "Why?". Like most ask. Why God? Why are you
putting me through this?!
I was shouting at God and getting angry and just thought that
God was torturing me for fun. That wasn't the
Now, I have always believed in the saying "Everything happens
for a reason." Even when "That" was happening. I didn't know the
reason for it, but I just knew that there was a
A couple weeks ago on Thursday night at The First Assembly Of
God youth group, a bunch of people talked, aka testimonies. It
all ended with someone asking everyone if they had a feeling or
whatever (he didn't say whatever but you know…whatever Lol)
sorry, I'm trying to be completely serious Lol, that's my last
laugh until I finish writing this…well maybe not…I'm watching
Friends as I write this so…yea.
But ANYWAYS, he said if you had a feeling or whatever that you
were sent to minister, then come up. Took me awhile, but I
finally (slowly) stood up and went to the only person I feel
comfortable praying for me, Lindsey Cage.
I (slowly) walked up to her and she smiled. I really already
expected that because she always smiles when I come up. I told
her that I might, possibly, someday want to go into ministry (but
again, I didn't like talking to people). She smiled and asked me
what kind of ministry I wanted to go into: travel, youth, be a
pastor (to older folks is what she means), or
I started to say youth but traveling is all that I've ever
wanted to do and…I just read all this and its seems kind of
pointless but PLEASE stick with me till the end. Anyway, I told
her I would like to travel and minister.
She was all like cool and smiled and stuff, then she started
to pray for me. After she was done, she told me to get down on my
knees and talk to God about it.
That is when I kind of…stopped. I felt very self-conscious
already. And being the only one to get down on my knees and talk
to air didn't seem very…yea. I didn't want to do it. But she
encouraged me and I finally stepped up to the stage and got down
on my knees, closed my eyes, and talked (in my mind) to
I told him that I wanted to go to different countries and talk
to people. Help them. I asked him to get me out of my
It went on and (Please still stick with me, I'm getting to the
end, promise) and I started asking God (not yelling) why he was
putting me through all this crap (not just with my cousin, there
was other stuff). And…I'm not crazy…but he did talk to
Ever since I was little I didn't believe in praying that much
because I couldn't hear him like others said they could. So I
felt like I was bad and God didn't want to talk to me. So I just
had been wishing so many times that I was dead. That I could get
the guts to kill myself. And that night, I finally told him that
I couldn't take it anymore. I didn't want to be like this. I
wanted to leave the past in the past! I WANTED! But he said that
everyone can want.
Everyone does want, but you have to believe
(corny, I know, but stick with me). You have to make yourself
believe that the past is the past. That its over. You don't have
to worry about it anymore. It done.
happened to make you stronger. (God is still talking by the way,
this isn't me saying this). This happened because you ARE sent to
minister. You can relate to people who have been through the same
thing, while others can't. Most of those people are afraid to
talk to "regular" people because they don't get where they are
coming from. YOU do. You can reach to the people who don't
believe in me. You can reach to the people that push me and
everyone else away. YOU are not worthless. You have a purpose. A
VERY important purpose. I didn't want to see you hurt this much,
but I didn't stop it because I needed you to go through this to
help me out. To help me and everyone around you. Because so many
people in this room are wearing fake smiles right now. YOU need
to help talk to them. Show them that you will listen and not
judge. Because that's how you are. That's how I made you. You
don't judge. You're sweet and friendly and a VERY great listener.
I made you exactly how you are for a reason. No one else on this
earth can do exactly what I destined for YOU to do. People can
try, but it won't be how you could have done
He is telling the truth. He set each and every one of you on this
earth for YOUR destiny. To do something that only YOU can
have your WHOLE life ahead and you don't want to spend it locked
in a room somewhere instead of helping.
Because that's what you can do. That's what everyone can and
should do. You can help by ministering, giving tithe and offering
at church, spare some change for a homeless guy. You can donate
to a charity.
There is a million things that could help someone. Just even
For example, you can go to www.tosavealifemovie.com
tell your story. Tell your story of how you were depressed and
suicidal or something else. Get personal. Because that is the
stuff that helps people. And tell them what helped you or what is
helping you get through that difficult time.
Because suicide is the number 1 cause of death with teens. And
I used to want to do that. I used to want to kill myself. To just
get off this earth because to be honest, this world is falling
But WE are the generation. THE generation. This world is not
going to last for very long. I'm not trying to be down but I
BELIEVE that God is coming back in this generation. FOR this
generation. We were born in this world as it all falls
WE have to spread the word. To help the people that nobody
seems to care about.
Telling your story could really help someone. Even one person.
Those kind of people just need someone to talk to. But they don't
want someone who doesn't get it.
Doesn't get where they are coming from. Doesn't
get exactly how that person feels and why that person feels that
I've been there. My dad used to beat me till we left. We
finally got away and my cousin started touching and molesting me.
We finally got away again, and my older brother beat me and
touched me. The one uncle I could talk to went and killed himself
a couple of years ago. I had my first taste of alcohol and got
more (but I stopped). I've been dealing with sex pressure and
stuff like that. Temptation is trying to drag me down and I've
been giving in but I'm trying to completely stop all of
There is a bunch of websites that you can go to to get help
and talk to someone. Some websites even let you talk to people
who have been where you are.
But those people who have gotten through hard things like
this…its time for you to do something.
stand up! To help out. However you can.
I'm trying to close this out but I don't know how. That's why
I haven't shutup. =P sorry.
Well…yea…just wanted to get that out…so…I guess the
Oh! And if you live up north in Louisiana, We are showing To
Save A Life at the Minden High School auditorium. PLEASE PLEASE
PLEASE come! It's a public event. Totally free. There will be
popcorn and drinks (also free). Invite everyone you
This film isn't one of those stupid, weird, hard to
understand, Christian movies. This movie gets real. And if you do
come, don't be shocked that the movie threw out a couple of cuss
words because, again, they get real.
This movie deals with drugs, sex, drinking, teen pregnancy,
abortion, cutting, suicides, peer pressure, self-consciousness,
and everything. It is amazing.
And don't think you can just say "eh, I might just rent it or
something" because this movie isn't out to buy or in theaters or
to rent. Trey bought it for over 1,000 dollars just to show it.
No not illegally. You can go to the website and buy it to show it
at schools and churches and stuff for public events. Not for your
home. But again, its over 1,000 dollars. Well over 1,500 I
think…Idk, I forgot.
It shows at the Minden High School on September 14. ask me if
you want more details, but I don't have much. I can give you
Trey's email to talk to. He's married by the way so don't try and
email him to flirt ;). If you can come then come. BELIEVE ME, its
life changing. This would be my third time seeing it and some
peoples fifth and nobody gets tired of it. Its AH-mazing
But also If you need to talk just ask. Believe me, some of
those websites aren't very good. I've tried a lot of them and
they don't help that much. And also I want to talk. If you have
questions about suicides, peer pressure about anything, religion,
I can talk about it all. And if you don't want to really talk,
you just want someone to listen, then I will.
If you love someone…then you need to tell them…because you
never know if that is the last chance you get to talk to them.
You don't need to say, "I'll talk to them tomorrow" or "I'll call
them tomorrow", because you never know when there wont be a
Ok, now I'll shutup =) Thank you guys (for the ones who stayed
till the end). This is just a rough draft of what I'm going to
preach about at youth. Hope you enjoyed it and I really hope that
someone will come to see the movie and I really really hope that
someone will talk to me or let me listen.
Also! (I know, I know, you probably really want me
to shutup). But! Again if you live in Minden or Heflin or even
Shreveport or Ruston Louisiana, then come to this Minden church
The First Assembly of God because its awesome and…believe me,
there is no just going one time. You will want to go again and
You can also go to Living Word Worship Center youth which is
on Wednesday (First Assembly of God youth on Thursdays). Living
Word is near wal-mart and ask me if you want to know where The
First Assembly church is because its small and easy to
Another plus is that there is A LOT of cute guys out there
(I'm talking to the girls right now Lol) But believe me there is!
What?...I'm still a teenager. One guy there, Aaron, who is one of
the cute guys by the way, you can talk to because…yea…he is a
good person to talk to if you need it. =)
OK! Now I'm gone! Peace! <3 P.S. Lol sorry its so long. Now
Oh! And! (omg sorry, I promise this is the last thing) but, if
you have any websites that could help then please post it down
below. =) And sorry that this is so...random...and i jump from
point to point and whatever because this isnt one of my best
writings but like i said, this is a rough draft of what i will be
talking about at my youth group...kinda...not some stuff like
where the movie is and stuff cause they know that. That is for
you guys =) And please come and see it if you can. Thanks again,
And Peace again =D