Sighing I looked longingly at the butterfly resting on my outstretched index finger. Its beauty was breathtaking, and it forced me to remember events that I had locked away so tightly in my head, or so I had thought.
Images flashed before my eyes, each one accompanied by a new wave of pain that rippled through my chest, making me want to curl up and cry. Me and him sitting on the beach, him chasing me through our meadow, each kiss we shared, each kiss that felt just as exhilarating as the first, him handing me a blue butterfly kept in a jar. My eyes welled up for what felt like the billionth time, remembering why I had fallen in love with him.
“I caught this for you, Tina. It’s beautiful, just like you.” I rolled my eyes at the cheesiness of what he just said. “I mean it, but its beauty isn’t as great as yours.” I flushed a brilliant red, and turned away, ashamed that he would see. He grabbed my chin and gently turned my head so I was facing him once more. “Don’t be afraid of blushing in front of me, it’s cute.” I giggled and nodded blushing even deeper red.
I looked down at the butterfly, and it broke my heart to see someone with such freedom caged up like this. I looked up at him, silently pleading with him to set it free, together. He nodded and I put my hand atop the lid, and he placed his hand over mine. I drew in a deep breath and slowly uncapped the jar and help it up in the air. The butterfly slowly flitted out; no doubt glad to be free from its clear prison. It moved back towards me and rested in the back of my hand, and I smiled brightly, so glad it came back. Its gorgeous light brown and white wings glimmering in the early September sun gleamed into my eyes.
“It came back…” I whispered, my heart warmed up, knowing such a creature of beauty chose to return to me. His arm snaked around my waist, pulling me into his warm body, “Of course it did, if you love something, set it free. Then, if it chooses to come back, it’s yours.” I looked up at him with tears brimming my eyes, threatening to spill over, “I love you.” I was shocked; this was the first time I had ever said that, and I meant it. He was taken aback as well, looking at me with such love, it warmed my heart. “I love you more than ever, so much more than you could ever understand.” He gazed down at the beautiful being on my hand and sighed.
Coming back to myself, I realized with a start that I had tears pouring down my face. My chest felt like someone had punched a hole right through it, I clawed at the sides of my chest, as if trying to repair the hole that was there. Crouching on the edge of the rock I was seated on, I gazed around me, at the magical rolling hills that stretched out for what seemed like an eternity. I spared a glance down and noticed that the ground below me wasn’t picture perfect like the rest of the scene, it was marred with jagged cracked rocks, threatening me with every moment I look at them. I considered the possibility of survival if I jumped from here, just to make this pain go away, so I never have to feel this again. I closed my eyes and shifted closer to the edge, balancing on the precipice of the rock, deciding whether or not it is worth it to take the leap. To feel the rush of wind fly through my hair and chill me to my bones, the rush of adrenaline burst through my veins, then, nothing. No pain, no excitement, no rush, just…death. Sadly, that was a welcomed thought right now.
**Word count 673 words**