I never thought I'd reach my eighteenth birthday, what with all the shit I've been through in the past years of my horrible life. So imagine the delight of waking up on the first day of spring and knowing I'm eighteen, still alive and healthy, well to an extent at least.
My appearance of course had changed significantly since I was eleven. I was the beautiful only child of Mr. and Mrs. Moore, a girl of average height and weight with light brown eyes and blonde hair. Dad used to say I could pull anyone with my good looks, but that's getting ahead of the story.
My name is Chloe Moore. I'm just an average girl with too many deep dark secrets that are too gruesome to reveal to the outside world. So keeping them hidden in this dairy is best, for a dairy is someone or something that can be confided in without telling the world the secrets you hide and won't judge you for what or how you write. Yes a diary is defiantly one way I can get things out of my mind and heart so I can feel better. Why I didn't start one earlier I don't actually know.
Mum and Dad were the richest people in the county and I say were because to put it quite bluntly they are dead. The three of us had just returned from a trip to France for my eleventh birthday, a place any girl would want to see. I was very happy I had thoroughly enjoyed my trip there and back. Seeing the beautiful Eiffel Tower and the Cathedral of Notre Dame and eating the strange cuisine of frog legs and snails. I however cannot remember the exact taste anymore. Although my heart was beating out of my chest in excitement at everything I saw. I was lost in my own world but the happiness that bought melted away the minute 'Uncle' Geoffrey Bale rang me...
That morning Mum and Dad were going to go for a drive and asked me if I wanted to join them, something in my heart told me to say no and for a change I listened to my instincts. This wasn't the first time my heart had spoken before my head had.. I said no, and off they drove. How I wish I had stopped them from going themselves, that stupid fucking truck driver. Who the hell drinks and then drives?! The driver flipped his entire truck turning a corner and landed right on top of them, but that's not what killed them the driver had LPG and it lit up blowing the car and truck into the air with no survivors whatsoever.
Oh my God, He's coming he cannot see this...
I have just got back from work; I have a job as a messenger at an illegal company which takes care of those women who with nothing left to live for turn to whoring themselves. And I run the errands of course, I could never do that to my body. It's just so filthy, Men are disgusting pigs, and men is an abbreviation of gentleman ha sure they are they would gently murder you if you did something wrong. Ok sorry, I know I'm supposed to be talking about my past at the moment but I really hate my job but if I loose it..
Well, three days after Mum and Dad died there was a funeral for them. I stood and watched as the Priest spoke his bullshit words of them being in a happier place I knew they were happy with their lives they had here with me, on Earth. Along with the friends they had, those they had left behind. All that races across your mind is how radically lives change when people leave. 'Uncle' Geoffrey turned up late as per normal and came and put his arm around my shoulder and apologized. Why do people do that? Apologize when someone dies? It's not something that could be helped, and it wasn't their fault, well in this case it was that truck driver. I hope he rots! I know I shouldn't speak like this but rage is building up, how do I get rid of it? I'll sleep on it. Goodnight.
Seven years they've been gone now...
I hate the life I lead no trust no love and no choice He forces me to do things...
Anything that crosses His mind, but I refuse to fill this diary up will the fear, hate and anger I feel for Him...
I'm sorry for yesterday I was short sentenced not to mention sad and then I had to go to work.
Back to my life story I suppose. 'Uncle' Geoffrey held me a little and waited for me to start crying. Except I didn't feel I had to cry I was still shocked by what I was witnessing here today. But being comforted for the first time since it happen I had to admit was very good.
"Hon" he said taking me out of his hug "I don't quite know what you would like to do now. You're too young to live in the manor alone. Why don't you move in with me?"
"No. The servants and maids have been looking after me. I don't want to leave my house, their house.." (Back then up until now it was illegal to live without a guardian unless you were 16). No. There was something about his offer that wasn't right he would never want to adopt me unless there was something in it for him like my money the money my parents had and what they had been saving for me and my tuition. Man how deceiving is that? Was he even their friend or was he the deceiving 'Uncle' who wanted to be a part of the family and the money?
"Chloe you can't stay alone without a legal guardian its against the law besides I am your Uncle"
"What? Geoffrey, you are no Uncle you're just in it for the money and always have been! Besides I want Clara to look after me." Clara was my own personal maid but had never actually truly been my maid but more my best friend. Clara was beautiful too, black raven hair and these green eyes that looked like malachite gems stones. She also had this great body and it surprised me that somehow she managed to still remain Miss Clara Elliott with no admirers.
"Darling, Clara can come live with us too in fact Clara doesn't have a husband to help her raise you properly."
"What are you getting at?" I sneered at him with piercing eyes, he must have been about 45 with graying hair that was thinning out, and he also had this annoying bit of hair he refrained to shave from his face. His eyes were black and soulless he was completely unreadable. I suppose what Geoffrey didn't know was that I really wasn't an ordinary rich girl who had it all and the only person who knew otherwise was Clara. I was staying with her no matter what.
"What if I asked Clara to marry me darling would you like that?"
"NO!" I screamed at him. I ran for it he disgusted me there was no nicer way to put it I hated him, he was just an old disgusting creep.
I got back to Clara a while later out of breath and with every intent to warn her of what Geoffrey had planned. I started to explain in short breaths "Clara, he's wan-ting to m-m-arry you"
"Sweetie what are you talking about? Here sit down and drink this. How was the funeral darling? Clara had passed me a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice and I drank it down hungrily. "Now what you were saying?"
"Clara, 'Uncle' well I suppose he isn't an Uncle at all, Geoffrey wants to marry you so he can adopt me, to get hold of Mum and Dad's money" I said hurriedly.
"What?" Clara stood up shocked as if I had just sworn directly at her, "Did he tell you this?"
"No Clara, I just know it in my heart something about him changed the minute Mum and Dad went away and now he's more cuddly and wanting to see more of me"
"Chloe what you have to understand is that the only money your parents have is for you and only for you. It's a trust fund so that when you start college you can pay for whatever your heart tells you to do" Clara smiled at me. She always had a way of making me understand things I really treasured her and I refused to let her marry Geoffrey no matter what he said.
I'm falling asleep and I don't want to go to sleep thinking of bad memories so I'll go thinking of my dear friend Clara... I miss her so.
Goodnight treasured Diary.
Well I guess I do live on my dreams for what I wanted to write up about today I dreamt about too. My unexplainable "powers" seem to be getting stronger and I'm not quite sure what to do about it but if I dream of a death I cause does that mean its still something I long to do to this day? I do fear for my own life. But I don't actually have the heart to kill myself but if something is going to kill me why stop it I would rather die than lead the life I do. I'm sorry I shouldn't speak like that you don't quite know why I would want to end my life and I should continue with my story so there is no questioning in the air and questions left unanswered.
The evening of the funeral I had heard nothing further of Geoffrey and his rude requests but my thoughts jinxed that, there was sudden gunfire and a servant came running into my quarters "Miss th'res gunfire in the woods the stable boy has been shot and killed!"
"What? Isabel is there anywhere we can hide all of the staff and I?"
"Yes mam, there is a place under the house which leads to the edge of the woods"
"Clara! Get away from the window they may see you!" I shout. It of course was too late and Clara had in fact been seen and a rock had been thrown at the window. The house was in a complete uproar.
"I want Chloe and Clara, kill everyone else!" It was Geoffrey's familiar voice I now knew I had really upset him.
"Hurry Miss, get downstairs" Isabel urged "I would rather die than see either of you two hurt by a heartless beast"
"That's really very sweet of you Isabel" Clara spoke out, "Come down with us don't stay here I would rather none of us got hurt at all."
Isabel sighed "Very well."
The three of us set off through the side doors in the rooms to get to the secret passage secretly I had wished for this kind of excitement but maybe not so detailed. Here we were running away from someone I had trusted since the day I was born. We reached the passageway and ran through it there was a musty smell reaching our noses but I didn't linger on it as a sudden light came at us and we realized the end of the tunnel was nearing. "Ha" I laughed out as we got outside again I was pleased to breathe fresh air. Then from nowhere rope was flying around tying Clara and I down. I looked up and into the face of Geoffrey he was holding Isabel in his grip with a gun to her head she was crying pleading for him to let all of us go.
"I don't think that will work Isabel my sweet, what you don't understand is that I will marry Clara as I have only ever dreamed of since meeting her and having the Moore's family fortune. This is where you come in Chloe you will take the money out of the account and give it to me then you may go free." He grinned I struggled to stand up to slap his stupid grin off his face but was pushed back to the ground by one of the many men he had with him, he stunk of alcohol and cigarettes which was probably part of what he was being paid with the other part was most likely some of my money Geoffrey thought he would be getting.
It's been nearly two weeks since I wrote in here because I was barely able to stand let alone write anything...I had slept in an hour later and in his books that's very bad and I'm lucky to still be alive because he beat me senseless then had the nerve to take me to a hospital to get looked at. Thankfully nothing was broken. I don't know why He treats me like He owns me, sure I work for Him but that's an entirely different thing He can't man handle me that's not how it works surely...
Anyway.. What was I talking about? Oh yeah I was thrown down, there came from Geoffrey's mouth a snicker I looked up at him and he smiled toothily at me. He made me sick.
He picked up Clara from the ground and said "This is no place for my woman to be, although you are more than welcome down there" Geoffrey started to laugh. Bit by bit the rage in me was building until I snapped I couldn't handle his snide remarks and his dirty hands touching Clara's chest.
I screamed at him "Geoffrey what the hell are you doing? Who do you think you are parading onto my parents' property and man-handling us like this?" I looked at Clara, her eyes filled with fear and tears I needed to help her in any way I could.
"Darling Chloe, a lady shouldn't shout at gentleman"
"You are no gentleman you are a dirty creep with no respect for anyone but yourself"
"Chloe, I have to look after myself there is no-one in my life to care for me." His eyes glanced sideways at Clara "Until now." His grip on Clara tightened and he walked off with her struggling in his arms he laughed at her.
I jumped up and ran off into the woods I had grown up here I knew where my hollow tree was and I was heading for it. I heard twigs breaking and leaves rustling on the ground as three men ran after me. They forget of course I'm eleven years old and full of rage and adrenaline like they would be able to catch up to me. I ran for what seemed ten minutes with the men still running behind I turned a corner sharply and slid under a bush until their footsteps went past.
"She went this way. Little brat she's being offered a good home and all she does is blow it up in Mr. Bale's face"
I couldn't be happier to hear them leave. I crawled out from
under the bush.
"Now what you should have done darl is realize that there were three of us and two sets of feet were heard walking off. What could have happened to the third I wonder?"
I gulped, and stared up into the face of this man. Knowing if he got me back to Geoffrey I would be in big trouble and that wasn't something I wanted. I wanted to free Clara but I would have to construct a plan to get her out of his estate safely. As I turned to run the other two men had heard the commotion and rushed back to see what was going on. I was caught like this innocent young fly in a spider web of greedy, disgusting, old men. I felt like becoming invisible and disappearing. Funnily enough..
"Where did she go? She was just there!"
"A witch! Run!!"
I stood there still in this circle of men they were looking right at me but couldn't see me I had as I wished become invisible right before their eyes and now they believed I was a witch. As they ran off I ran with them being invisible could mean I could grab Clara back from the hands of that rat Bale. Uncle? Ha no way. We returned to where Geoffrey was as the men explained to him that I had vanished with no trace of where I went. Bale's face went a shade of red as he fumed his anger. Clara however, her mouth twisted into a smile and prayed quietly "Thank God"
"What was that Clara my sweet?" Bale's eyes pouring into hers as he spoke his words of poison.
"Nothing" Clara replied "Its just she's eleven and you couldn't catch her you were outsmarted by and eleven year old?"
One of the men that had follow me into the woods, the one would hadn't spoken at all and seemed so nice went up to Clara and slapped her in the face. Clara's mouth dropped open like she was a little actress knowing full well she had deserved what was given. However, before I could go and bite the guy as I had planned to Bale's gun had shot bullet into this man's chest.
"Never ever touch my woman!"
I had just witnessed my first murder, and I was sitting in this tree shaking and watching what was going on I felt I was going to fall out of the tree but knew that if I was no longer invisible they would see me. I wanted to call out to Clara to let her know I was there I needed to know if I was invisible or not. I snapped a twig in the tree, all 17 men, Geoffrey and Clara turned to look in the direction of the noise.
"Find that girl she belongs to me I have so many jobs for her to do at home"
I ruined it Geoffrey was walking away with Clara but I knew I was invisible otherwise they would have seen me in the tree. I climbed down and ran towards the car they were getting in and got in on the other side and moved the back chair forward to roll into the boot and latched the seat back just as Geoffrey opens the door for Clara she gets in without a complaint although as he shut the door she sighs deeply
"Clara I'm in the boot I will save you" I managed to whisper before Geoffrey gets into the car. Had she heard me? Would she hold her head up and be strong until I could figure something out?
"Driver to my house" Geoffrey's orders were short and threatening enough to be feared by his workers and his driver starts the car and drives out of my driveway. Would I ever see my beloved home again? Clara was defiantly worth loosing the house over. Poor Clara.
I'm sorry for the absence work has been extra busy as an out of town tour group came through and that meant drunken horny men who wanted some love.
But that's not important...
We drive for what seems hours over bumpy terrain I feel he's not going to his house but somewhere else far out somewhere not even my parents must have known about. The car finally stops and I feel it lift up slightly as someone gets out followed by woman's foot steps. Clara had been taken out the car and had obviously not fussed did that mean she had heard me?
I wait for about fifteen minutes before I dare to get out of the car, I wriggle the door open and peer out to make sure no one is looking or that anyone was about. Once the coast was clear I got out not bothering to close the door and sprinted off to the barn in the distance, not caring about the other buildings around I wanted to be either hiding in amongst the animals or the hay bails I hoped were in there.
I get in through a side door and notice a beautiful horse black as the night with odd white spots on his back, a grey goat, an old sow and a few sheep and there in the corner the hay bails I wanted to see. I dive into it and wait; someone's bound to see the car door open. Shit! I hadn't shut the barn door. Questions raced inside my mind; should I leave it? Should I shut it? Would I get spotted if I do shut it? On my way to the door will someone walk in? If I leave it open will someone come in and search the barn?
Fighting the negative thoughts I scramble out of the hay and get to the door looking outside a little I don't want anyone noticing the door shutting. Thankfully there's no one and as soon as I shut it I hear voices "Why is that car door open?" it was Geoffrey's voice I turn and jump back into the hay hiding myself well. The barn door creaks open the horse starts to grunt and snort at him. "Jason, damn it, I want that horse whipped and broken in for me to ride or for Clara to use she will not get onto a horse that is likely to throw her off. Do I make myself clear?"
I hear some shuffling around and the voice of a boy who must have been a little older than me stammer "Yes sir, of course, whatever you say" I hear a slap and I figure the boy, Jason must have been hit to the floor, "Don't patronize me boy!" I hold my breath worried I'm breathing too loud. The barn door slams shut and someone starts crying, after a while I get the guts to have a look. The boy I assume to be Jason sits there crying on the floor. He seems pretty fragile and shocked so I fight my nerves and climb out of the hay and walk over to him. The boy is shaking all over, he's thin but not too thin, his greasy unwashed black hair sits unbrushed all over his head it's long and hides his tears from view well. "Are you ok?" I ask him quietly not wanting to startle him. He does jump a little however and stares at me for a bit his hazel eyes pouring deep into mine. I can't read him he seems almost empty inside as if he has nothing left, no will to live. His lip starts to quiver he's stopped crying now but almost seems he will start again. "Who are you and what are you doing here?" His sudden outburst caught me off guard I thought he would be nice to me. "Jason, is that your name?" I ask politely and he nods his head in answer, "You may have noticed but your boss Mr. Bale has an extra guest a female guest who doesn't want to be here and I want to help her get away" I stop talking, waiting for some sort of sign that he has understands what I am saying. Secretly I pray he isn't a blabber mouth, what would happen if Geoffrey knew I was here?
"Are that Chloe girl he was swearing about before?"
"Yes I am Chloe. He was swearing about me? Do you have any idea why?"
"You ruined his plans, which is a good thing if you ask me but as you can see he then takes it out on his staff" I turn away from Jason and think of what to do next am I just going to barge into the house and demand Clara back? Or do I have to sneak about? Sighing I turn back to face him the tears still sitting in his eyes, the handkerchief my father always told me to carry suddenly in my hand as I wipe away his tears. He smiles at me, "I will help you in anyway I can. He has treated me like dirt since the day my mother died"
"Jason, how old are you?" I ask him gently hoping he answers me.
"I'll be 17 next month" he stammers, there's something in his voice which makes me wonder whether he is actually sure of his age or that he is just taking a guess.
Why I'm mentioning this is quite pointless but I'm just saying it as I remember it really. Remembering it as clearly as I can may help me to keep the story straight.