After walking for almost two hours through the "Oktoberfest" in Munich, on the search for something good to eat but not being able to make a choice of what to eat, (which by the way always happens to me when I am too hungry already), my brother Klaus and me ended up in some Asian restaurant in downtown. I paid him a visit while he was there for some chemo. I think No.11 or 12. It was a late September noon. We were sitting in front of our chicken sweet sour and a couple of cokes when all of a sudden he looked up to me underneath his navy blue NY baseball-cap and asked: "Why, why me"? I looked in his eyes, trying to hold back my tears, asking myself this same question. Why? In that instant this three letter word got itself branded into my brain. WHY? Why? Why do things like this happen? That was the moment when I promised myself: I will find the answers to that question. My subconscious mind was programmed from that second on to lead me on this quest to find "The Answers", to solve the riddle of life, where we come from, why we are here& where we go from now on.
Nine months later he died in the night of June29th in 1999. Moments before his last breath he did the weirdest thing. He asked me,`he literally requested`, to listen to the song For The First Time from U2 and to watch the movie The Usual Suspects.
Another nine years passed when just around my birthday in 2008 I finally understood exactly why he had told me those words in the hour of his death. Immediately I could connect all those, to this revelation, significant events in my life. From the date of my birth, to the names I had been given.From the things that had happened, good or bad,to stuff like: Why did I move to Mexico? Why do I speak all those languages? Why did I meet this or that particular person? Etc. I suddenly realized that my quest to find "The Answers" did not start back then in Munich, no, it had been going on already for all my existence in this and even in past lives.
What had happened in late April in 2008? I sat in front of my computer, checking my messages, when all of a sudden this tiny picture of a female face was right there on my screen. No bigger than one quarter of an inch wide and half of an inch high. I have never seen this face before, but instantly I knew, this is my soul mate, my other half, the missing part of me. Not because her looks were stunningly beautiful, no, I just felt it in every cell of my body.Once I saw her name on the right side of the image, my head felt like it is going to burst.I was glowing and freezing at the same time and I could actually hear my heartbeat pounding through my veins. So that was what my brother meant. So that was the key to every universal law. So there is a code. So there is a purpose behind all. I had finally received my first answer.
I knew that my life was going to change in a drastic way. It was a long way down to nothing at all. One thing I understood pretty soon. In order to get everything, I needed to give and give away everything first. In my case this meant family, job, possessions, security, pride, etc. even to have the willingness to give my own life. Somehow I have opened a door, went right through it and what I have seen was so wonderful, so beyond mankind wildest dreams, that you will understand how someone is able to walk away from all that you can leave behind and just jump into the unknown, guided by just this vision of a future no one ever has fathomed that it could exist.
This book is dedicated to my brother Klaus and my beloved children Isabella, Alexis-Klaus & Paloma, so they will understand why things happened this way.