I'm trying to make today to be a wonderful day. When I hear sad things I try so hard to ignore them. Everyday i'm alone I try not to think of the pain inside my heart. I'm trying so hard
to be the person i need to be. Everynight i pray that God will keep you safe. Sometimes it seems so overwhelming that i cry. I know how much you mean to me but i have a hard
time saying it out loud. Cause it seems that when i say it out loud it all disappears. I try to express my feelings but end up falling flat on my face. I think what hurts the most is the
words left unsaid. For they gather in my mind and haunt my dreams. Little by little I dream of being better but it seems llike it is impossible. I count down the minuets until i see you
but teh clock keeps ticking. Suddenly I begin to cry. My fears come to life. I have become the person that i have dispised my whole life. I have often seen that the person that i can't
get along with is myself. Its a little harder to forgive ones self becasue we set high standards for ourselves and when we make a mistake we hate that we let ourselves down. All
we can do is pray that we will find peace with our hearts. We are the only ones who can choose who we are. but the only thing is we got to believe in ourselves too.