My name is Lizzy Clarks and I am a abused child who had just found out that I had Breast Cancer. My mother did not believe me whenever I told her she just laughed and told me I was bluffing so I could get out of doing my work. Then she would hit me in the breasts and say, "I feel no lumps you pathetic liar!" I prayed that someday she would see the light and leave me be.
My mother was allwasys a drunk drug abuser. She drank and did crack, heroine, anything she could get her hands on. She used to be married to a handsome, wonderful doctor who in his grasp tried to do everything to help her. But couldn't he could never succeed. I watch and he told her to stop or he'll leave her and she told him,"I don't give a damn if you go fall in a hole and die slowly and painfully." He said right back, "Thats what your doing to yourself, me, and this family your suppostedly taking really good care of!"
When daddy left I felt alone. Then momma was getting angrier by the way I cleaned for her. It wasn't the right way. It wasn't her way. So whenever I cleaned wrong or miss a spot momma would kick, punch, slap, choke, anything she could possibly do to me. I would go to school all beaten up and my friends would ask what happened to me. I would sit there and lie in front of all their innocent, unmarked, bueatiful faces.
Clairese one of my best friends asked if I wanted to stay the night at her house one time. I was happy and actually praying and hoping momma would let me. But when I asked her momma punched me in the breast and told me to go clean. The next day when I was getting ready for school momma said to tell my friend I had my mothers friends party to go to so I couldn't. I told her and instantly I saw pain and sadness in her face.
Jewel my second friend who sits with me everyday at lunch asked if I wanted her pudding because she was allready to full. I happily agreed, when she handed me the pudding I put it in my lunch box with my only source of food my peanut butter and jelly sandwich. When I got home I secretly went to my bedroom knowing that mother was allways asleep when I got home. When I queitly shut my door I pulled out the pudding and started eatting it with happiness. It was the greatest thing I ever tatsted. But apartly mother had been awake and saw me sneak to my room. Because she ran into my room with a liquor bottle in one hand and a paddle in the other.
She stopped and stood there watching me. I had a spoon full of pudding and had it mid air close to my mouth.
"Go ahead and finish your pudding darling."She said in a cold harsh voice.
I dropped the spoon back into the cup. And said, "Im not really hungry." She then put her liquor bottle on my dresser and grabbed my arm. She pulled me into my bathroom and she sat on the toliet. She bent me over her leg and pulled my pants down. She then started wailing on me with the paddle. When she was finished I dropped to the floor unable to feel my bottom. I started to cry when she stood up she told me, "From now on if you get any kind of treat you give it to me." I nodded and kept cry before she left she spitted on me.
Daddy had come to see me and check up on how I was doing. Even though I was in pain physically and emotionally. I told him I was fine and I was doing good in school. He told thathe was proud of me. Before he left he gave me a bar of choclate I looked down at it and felt my saliva running threw my mouth. Daddy was still in front of me when I turned and gave it to momma. He gave her and I a look of why? I looked down in shame and knew I would never be treated the same again.
The day I got diagnose with Breast Cancer changed my life with momma. She hit me even more she made me work even more. I couldn't go on in life knowing I was suffering...I made few attempts to kill myself and never succeeded. One day momma caught me trying to hang my self. She grabbed the rope and grabbed my neck. She dragged me threw the house. Finally she threw the rope in the closet. And threw me against the wall. As she yelled I could smell the heavy stench of alcohol in her breath.
I spent the rest of my life in the hospital from Breast Cancer and from all the damage my mother hitting me. My mother has died from alcohol abuse. My father is in a nursing home somewhere in Nevada, Las Vegas. That is my story...