laying, arms stretched, on poolside lounge
flying, swooping, demeaning in nature
black, in the sun, it starts to scrounge
hummingbirds, scared off, this begins its prowl
intrigued. watching, this soul on a chair
stalking, mocking, this beast among birds
a menace, a creep, protecting its lair
denizens of the desert, stricken with fear
amazed, this boy, to such exciting being
people, all around, neglect such fowl
scared, are they, as it ascends, leaving
returning ever again, shrouded in darkness
this crow, the eternal fright
“Cowbell Odyssey in Space”
a stark and stormy Tuesday, planet Earth
lone cow, grazing; this wretched birth-
-demon, from Mars, to wreak havoc, oh joy
twenty years passed, cow dismissed, left a boy-
-juvenile cow, mischeivious, good at heart
meteors; crash, waves; splash, this end; a start
devastation, the Earth falls to its grave
angel, of Neptune, rushing with plan to save-
-that cow, a hero, heaven-sent, with a quest
wings, grown on the cow, quickly, mustn't rest
angel, now gone, duty fulfilled, the Earth; won't last
flying high, so high, away, into space, oh so fast
Venus, Mercury, the Sun, all of them; passed
through galaxies and fields, through all, in a blast
a stop, so gentle, on a planet called Yan
inhabitants, so welcoming, not a soul ran
the tale; so awful, the meaning; they understand
cow fed, set off with cowbell, does he understand?
demon, on a rampage, Saturn Jupiter Uranus, no more
Neptune, he chuckles, oh man, what a bore
Pluto, now seized, an army; powerful, now please
dispatched, they are, abolishing whatever, what ease
planets and galaxies, all going down; no reason
this devil, now rests, oh what a great time for treason
revolution: Grundy's troops take over the throne
demon, now banished to wherever, just not this stone
Grundy; good man, halts this destruction; remote peace
enter Planet X, conquered, by that demon with ease
wandering cow, returned to save, yet scared
reign of this demon continues, yet worse; unscathed
the universe, in utter chaos, what's the answer?
worlds trashed, people enslaved, where's our saviour?
this demonic rule, so vile, will his power ever fall?
planet Neptune, neglected, the most helpless of all?
remember, the angel, cow wings, but is an end near?
will our great universe be left with constant fear?
cow, at bay in the deserts of planet Sanstroke
a vision, from mother; message of enlightening hope
departure; setting fourth towards the mighty X
bell, glowing bright, as they land on Planet X
minions, all felled, cow not finished, belts out 'Moo!'
confrontation; a duel of much elegance, demonic boo!
this battle; epic, lasts for ever, no signs of weakening
the angel, friends, attend the show; constant cheering
finale; soon comes, the bell rings; deafening screech
demon falls, while the angels summons with speech
this cage, the demons doom, eternal, lost in space
the evil, no more, but worlds still not in place
back to Earth; a wasteland, what a burden
angel ventures off, seeking the wizard Gurden
found, and understanding, casts spell of restoration
worlds revived, chaos thwarted, no need for creation
the cow, happy, sleeping at the farm; a legend
the universe; now safe, for this tales end
“The Mexican Walrus”
a hazy night in the desert
just walkin' to pass the time
pretty bad place, pray i dont get hurt
heard a voice, 'hey man, i'm feelin' fine'
i look, no ones around, freaked, whats goin' on
there he is, with his reversed frown
starts to whistle, 'man i love this song'
his 'stache, so elegant, i stare in awe
leaning against a cactus, he pulls it out
the blade, so shiny, 'man it's like a saw'
i shouted, the end is near
a desert, empty, no one to hear
sombrero, so big, tilted, hiding his eyes
takes a shot of tequila, i feel tears in my eye
'man that's quality', complimentary sigh
'wrong time and place kid', the walrus speaks
here comes the blade, out come my shrieks
i embrace the messenger of death, and move on
the Mexican walrus, satisfied, moves to the next town
while the cactus, now haunted for eternity
“Sea Cowboy & The Dead Bandit”
enter this town did he
bloody, wretching this sea
murderer, game for me
stout and pitiful, blessed be
victims a plenty, bastard he
yet I, cowboy of this sea
trailing; a task, drunkard he
sober for life, get not me
stop, what amaze, where be
behind, just grazed, oh me
knife; weak, primitive he
revolver, skill, clever me
a stab, bloody mush, blast he
a shot, bloody wreck, blessed me
but I am the walrus said he
but no, a dead man i see
elsewhere go I, to hell for thee
satisfied, paid, the life of me
“El Antiguo Cacto Sabiduria”
eternal, motionless; here i reside
this hazy desert, never to ride
free, yet controlled; to sand abide
oh, i sit and stare, and never dare
to interfere; bold, i am aware
yet, i do nothing, just stare
many a lost soul traverse this sand
none so elegant, just vile and bland
but one, truly lost, right by this hand
this man, confused, name i knew not
though brave, still lost, and so shot
tossed away, and there left to rot
nothing could i do, but to sigh
while his corpse, laid out to dry
eternal, and with nothing, no lie
many a crime, there were it seem
growing wiser, with every scream
yet nothing, can i do but dream
“Respectable Old Goat”
like the cactus, one is wise
tales of yore, craft one's eyes
never not teaching, never one lies
for the lost, one may pray
"to death a life," one may say
dwell in sorrow, never one may
of the walrus, one does write
"joy for one is sin, black is white"
"while black for me, invokes fright"
forgave he who's shot, one has
and his murder, one lets pass
yet to corruption, one just laughs
psyche to action, one knows well
tolerant is one, of all and hell
but scold one can, to he of shell
belief to one and all, faith to none
"to all of joy, hell is no one"
doctrine of all, one won't shun
accepting is one, to he who's free
pitying who pose and reject,"I am me"
respectable old goat, one may see
“Corruptible Young Soul”
Joe, oh woe, his soul, for show
hollow, follower, fame; this blow
ain't a leader, got no mind, his bind
Jack the hack, conformist slack
pleads oh joy, no more space crack
write politics, nae funky souls and torment
Vinny, what a pity, world so gritty
plays the fool, tool of this city
does as is told, dudeman, just fold
Sarah, i can't hear ya, it's clouded
cries of acceptance, what's hot, shouted
you try, but fry, poseurs, must die
Sam, poor man, lost; eternally shafted
stood up, but fell, oh, but if fads lasted
noble cause, oh the flaws; pop society
Ted, one head, he'll vote, pretty fee
D or R, it matters not; popular plea
flippity flop, sing it: be rich if hop
the youth, oh the masses
popularity; fills their glasses
they follow, are hollow; pawns
what's hip, you dip, ain't your call
tough the bullet, take the fall
just follow, these people; ruled
in this life, majority schooled
oh corruptible young soul
“Frustration Shell”
out of bed, full of dread
what a fool, late to school
that’s the bell, commencing hell
just another day, boring today
algebra, hist, english, oh shit -
- homework! slackers reversed perk
Sarah, a saint, helping cheat, yeah!
hallways of whores, rooms of bores
need sleep, getting weak; die sheep!
Mick; bully, jock, just a prick
to resist; yes, but he'll persist
Ted; a merc, socks that blonde jerk
aw, PE; sixth, wanna ditch
"so you're gunna go?" dammit Joe
classes end, to this; finger i send
home, just walking, no talking
this life; people end with a knife
working all day, student; no pay
to dwell, no; just break the shell
difficulties arise, look man, red eyes
got insomnia?, just add school drama!
just ate, more work, ah; so late
anger and frustration, this little nation
time to die...wait, i lie
already ten, myself; a plucked hen
oh look; tomorrow, no need of sorrow
hello, punching bag, abolished; a rag
channel the furry, ah, gotta hurry
breakfast, so tired, doesn't last
overworked, this student; cooked
look at the mess; "society's" best
peasants; all, congregation; the hall
POP; their leader, just die, sir
another test, work; all around pest
old news, i sing the blues
everyday; the same, an unbeatable game
there's no hope, i can't cope
I fight, anything in sight
my madness; truly, awful sadness
oh, just break the frustration shell
“Pandas on Parade”
walking; frolicking, halting & talking
nothing - this and nothing - that
or could be --- just a hat
prancing; dancing, slight romancing
something - trip, something - swim
this joy --- ne'er slim
exciting, enticing, never trying
in this town, in that town
nae adorn --- single frown
oh, what wonder
of something
of nothing
of random
of fandom
of of's
of doves
of whatever
and more
- never bore -
of this
of that
of crazy
of lazy
of never
and a mile
of must
oh must
oh stay, you must
to enjoy, to employ
to watch, to awe
to see and not believe
one must
yes must
do trust
you must
too much, no such
to of, oh of
to cry, I lie
of joy
much joy
to view such sight
of elegant might
as these beings
of nothing
of something
of these pandas on parade
“To Black To Green”
to black to green
to lack to greed
from the wake of sin
from the envy of those
from the hatred of men
from the desperation of weak
to black to green
to all and us
to kill and fuss
to slit and kuss
to steal and whine
to cheat and lie
to let one die
for the money of the rich
for the lives of the poor
for the liver of that bitch
for the sex of that whore
to black to green
for this gluttonous scene
to pillage and rape
to rummage and take
to the end of theirs
to the induction of yours
to black to green
to the darkness of the alley
to the crisp touch of a dollar
for the wretched and the ornery
for the purse and the skirt
for the thieves and the dirt
from the cash flow
from the stacked hoe
from the demons screams
from the poisoned streams
to black to green
to the banks and rob
to the skanks and throb
to the kidneys and sell
for the abused and desperate
for the cell mates that let it
from the doctors in Porsches
from the lawyers and freaks
for the devil in me
for the angel in him
for the hunger of man
we build this sin
“Tiefstand eines Dämons (A Demon's Depression)”
palm; swift, shattering profile,
laughter; menace, self-unto.
blow, im darm; oben schmerz,
violent; wirklich, only do.
verkratzen, crimson bled geschict,
blink; schrei, bemuht self-action
kiemme, schmerz, lid unwrapped,
twitch of eye, wangsselbst reaction.
wasting away, zum chmiedehammer,
own action, zufügen von schmerz,
all of self, niedergedrückter verstand.
strike unto, mad crushing bliss,
trembling wrist, selbst nae halt.
beat fore-on, menschliche schmerz.
shifted cap; vom knie, can't not.
burdened chest, stark angeschlagen,
nicht glücklich, getan, not for pain.
lashed at heart, faust besitzen,
forced unto, hilflos, lets it rain.
weg vergeuden, maul one own,
tätigkeit besitzen, inflicting pain,
die ganze selbst, depressed self.
unverständlich, cannot be helped,
schlechter dämon, damaging own,
er fiel aus, er starb, cannot be helped,
dead, a man depressed, bis für immer.
“This Madcap at Dawn”
awoke, this madcap at dawn
lurking this wretched space
out to in, beneath again
sinned gestures, insanity lawn
down to never, mad hares love.
and she knows, this madcap at dawn
death-black clouds, mad vision in haze
and he knows, tonight is again
tomorrow is forever, still gone
unhinged eternal, mad shared love.
“The Creation”
absent, greytone sky
red is gone, and pale a fade
what went wrong with our terrible lie?
what went wrong, leaving Gaia to die?
homosapiens, experimental mold of chance
step up from the seed, yet the most to bleed
all but gone, but best forgotten
oh what went wrong?
what went wrong with our terrible lie?
animals, true, just not to them
fought for order, and felled in chaos
for beasts they were, but the beast has fallen
oh what went wrong?
life lurked under, sunken to their feet
arrogance of man, death be waiting
suppressed instincts, and a will of creation
what went wrong with our terrible lie?
constructing the piper, a quest to nothing
falling back to what they never were
annihilation by your hand, only not your own
oh what went wrong!
the Kingdom knew, but only helpless
awaiting their fate at the dawn of man
clueless were we, as the necro-sheep
oh what went wrong with our terrible lie!
killing each-other, only to die because
a creation of chance, our creation of nothing
nothing just to take away, away to nothing
oh what went wrong!
only thinking about ourselves, simple ink
writing our script to die of ourselves
the Kingdom knew, why couldn't we?
oh what went wrong!
to end, they braced, accepting applied fate
our end, a surprise, far too dumb
unaware still, while maimed by ourselves unknowing
oh what went WRONG!
absent, greytone sky,
red is gone, and pale a fade,
what went wrong with our creation?
what went wrong?!
leaving our mother to DIE!
“Spring's Moonlight Waltz”
hear the bus get gone
and i get on my way
darkness abound in the apparent haze
steppin' calmly 'hind a shady man
murky puddles all around
and unseen slugs just slitherin'
oh what fate is held for this one
oh whatever will take place,
when this night is done
settlement approaches, very near
the smoked predator departs
in peace for a time, just not long
a call i desire, doesn't last
continuing along the damp streets
excited, yet fearful all the same
oh what fate is held for this one
oh whatever will take place,
when this night is done
alone no more, cars speed through
lighting up the pleasant night sky
foot of the mountain dead ahead
thus commencing exhaustive climb
pass the bubbling foam
beneath dripping leaves
oh what fate is held for this one
oh whatever will take place,
when this night is done
midway up, and hot in cold
suddenly heavy, drenched as well
heavy downpour, but moreso soft
grueling thirst has a vicious bite
trees bring refreshments
only not enough
oh what fate is held for this one
oh whatever will take place,
when this night is done
mysterious lady offers a lift
strange, do i know this girl?
politely, i decline, reasons unknown
driving back up, she reinstates
do i know her? circulating in motion
vanishing in an instant, alone again
oh what fate is held for this one
oh whatever will take place,
when this night is done
soaked, now chilled, i still move
the final stretch, or so it seems
dehydrated, consult nature's guidance
gotten confused, more to ascend
erratic movement in effect
dis-complemented through yield
oh what fate is held for this one
oh whatever will take place,
when this night is done
long venture, two hours passed
certainly the metros on back
road stretched to bliss
shot limping to the finish
home, quite finally at that
with visions, not forgotten
“The Maze of Love”
i'm not sad right now. but i am still mad. glad all the same, but certainly not mad.
for my madness, as it were, is not much madness but rather a lunacy.
a lunacy of sorts, a distortion of the ever wild mind, instability if i may
i can yet i cant, but i cant what i can, my mind it wanders, it floats.
a boat in the chaotic sea of jay, ever twisting, ever turning.
and yearning, passionately burning, for love, yes love.
yet love is not defined, and so, i'm left in shambles.
shards of those precious, concealed.
caged in a petting zoo of mind.
open to all, only closed by some.
for free they are to burn all night, but not to burn, just spin.
as they spin across my haunted skull, shoving and shoving to break on through.
only never to do, for as indecisive as i am, arise an issue of maze.
the maze of love for this soul not sane.
as i like them all, or so i thought, and thinking still am.
while some do know, others may not, for too many are sought.
unhealthy as it lies, this one cannot decide.
to whom my love will go, shall grow, not slow.
but the decision cannot be made, in this mad charade.
a mind unstable is a mind unfit for a brick.
a brick eternal, set, ever thick and hardly shaken.
an item inanimate, animating ones feeling.
all too much, for a rampant mind.
the mind of a nomad, a vagabond mad.
a mind not sticking, insomniac at best.
never to rest, or even follow through.
with one decision made seceded by its trump.
henceforth the love is there, only distant.
breezing through, but always through.
concrete to lay, un-poured for today.
in the madcaps mind, passive sought love you'll find.
“Follow Me”
laugh o' me
crackled thee
as the madcap danced
and broke his knee
“To Follow and Follow, 'Til Death Do Us Part”
follow me, he said
in the days of the figurehead
sheepishly we followed and bled
follow me, they spoke in unison
after suffrage of the apparent son
lead through the word, none to run
follow me, once more was preached
raining gold in haste, once beseech-ed
trailed were we, to a goal not reached
follow me, the powerful hailed
heard always as the word sailed
never suspect to have failed
follow me, once was said
leaving not, but deceit and red
even after were all dead.
“Nothing”
nothing.
motion, emotion, just a notion -
presence.
solitary, arbitrary lethargy
nothing.
presence, incense, essence of mind
submission.
creation, innovation, passion of self
nothing.
affection, rejection, merely projection
aura.
splendidity, calmity, vivid eccentricity
nothing.
emptiness, loneliness, ideals of holiness
peace.
bleeding, feeling, thoughts streaming
everything.
motion, emotion, slothing potion.
“Dream of an Emotionless Manta”
into the sea,
into the sea,
into the sea, it flies.
aquatic soaring to the surface,
to the sand,
to unimaginable depths, seemingly on preference.
or reference...
from the blood soaked cavern that is a sharks mouth.
to glide to its food at respectably gentle pace.
to greet its death-ailed friend with out face.
no emotion to speak of.
the Manta Ray stalks its prey from the shadows of the sea,
slothing by as if it were an obese, mort pigeon,
floating in a murky pond in an undisclosed, downtown, urban area.
it feeds and it flees, as if it were no bother.
vanishing to places unknown.
into the sky,
into the sky,
into the sky it dreams to fly.
wishing to scout the Gemini, and Aries.
seeking warmth and lightness.
a refuge from its tidal disposition.
A freedom.
a freedom only the Manta Ray will never know.
“El Babel”
the gods descended upon the stone paeons
noticing all t'was a tongue in unison
and upon his might divine,
dissolved in ne'er but an instant.
the men of hubris, thine nature of God humanized
it acted fast in efforts ideal
but upon pride of all Elohim
t'was deemed mortal sin, thereby forsaken
a tower spiraled towards the heavens
nae a bridge to flee from purgatory
merely a symbol of devotion
enacted worship upon El manifested
slaving away in the arid sands
piling stone upon scorched rock
all together, to shine down Elys
if only for a moment, but no
Elohim, thy plurality, forbade it
establishing a race of caucus
and severing thine tongue in still
abolishing the tower, but erecting Babel
“Ba'al Levant”
here I stand
amidst the arid chaos
thy desert heat reigns o'er
smiting those weak and unworthy
while maddening the caps of here or there
bickering and boasting, they ne'er cease
they look to a leviathan of a man
the Goliath they call him
praising him, fending him off on all in the way
nae lasting long I may add
for a divine young boy heralded a rock
with much precision slung into beasts eye
felling him without care to the world
as they looked onto David as their hero
enlightened by the star they chose belief
and when the son came along
not a pinch of grief
spilled or concealed, the peace embodied
was theirs to keep
he built the first temple
to Yahweh it stood
but with calm encroached boredom
no more wanting stability, but war
primal nature as it were
so onto Zebub of Ba'al they chose to see
and hear his pride and feel his hook
feasting off the men, for damned they were
escaping Solomon to live in hate
to thrive and die in ways of sin
in this arid chaos, paradise of sand
it all begins at the end whilst same
“She Couldn't Say Yes”
i'm a screw up
a lame duck
nothing but a fuck up
i'm a depressor
an always lesser
only a fucking stress-or
i'm a failure
a busted trailer
always wanting her
but she couldn't say yes
she couldn't say yes
WHY COULDN'T SHE SAY YES
WHY THE FUCK COULDN'T SHE SAY YES
leaving me depressed
sullen
broken
but hopeful
for the day
that she says yes.
“This is Not a Lie”
everybody will die
everybody will die
this is not a lie
you all will die
we all will cry
we all will cry
this is not a lie
we always cry
we are all a lie
we are all a lie
this is not a lie
we all fucking lie
we all fucking lie
we all fucking lie
YOU FUCKING LIE
YOU FUCKING LIE
HE FUCKING LIES
SHE FUCKING LIES
i fucking cry
i fucking cry
WE ALL FUCKING CRY
WE ALL FUCKING LIE
WE ALL FUCKING DIE
WE ALL FUCKING DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
“My Dying Heart's Private Song”
a piece of me dies everyday
i'm mis-percieved in every-way
i'm mis-percieverd everyday
everyone doesn't see me
rotting in the new black sea
only i just sit and let it be
they all see me
just not the way i want to be seen
yet i endorse it regardless
as i wallow in the sorrows
and bash on the hollows
who take me all wrong
so i sing my private song
to no one at all
im never seen but i'm always there
with wicked fashion and standout hair
but the guy that's seen isn't really there
i truly need them all
just not amidst this grey wall
that was built by them all
they all know
only deformed in their faux-inspired dreams
i'm just too weak to confront
i need to be pushed
and let my shadow back out
from behind its grave much disturbed
i need the clouds to break away
then i'll be known by all
“Get Off the FLips Girl”
its a wear on your soul
"they lift my soul and lick it and cover it in flowers"
it chews mine and spits i on a dirty needle
thus giving me AIDs
from a fat gay gigolo
drilling some fruit in San Pablo
while i cringe and cry in some alley
dying
while politicians bicker and snicker
and the business of America
wont release the pill
for money they would lose
regardless of good nature
helping the people you con
and so i ascend
and wish you a cold day at the seat of Satan
“PCP”
pcp
frightening
gouging away of eyes
images so stark
rancid, vile
spawn of ba'al
i must
die
with eye
i must
i must
i do not lie
for to night
i lie
in my bed of thorns
“Dark Bliss”
why the does the darkness, guided thru warm mist, wear a velvet glove over an iron fist?
and why does the light, shine so bright it blinds, and shoots you to dark bliss?
“Divine Feeling”
blood
my hand is pale
i can feel the feeling being lost
it cant shake, so the other does
uncontrollably devout
o nurture its own suffering
allowing the human form divine
to be its own in death
“Cinematic Masterpiece”
my hand is paling,
and my wrist is ailing,
as it seeds the poison,
of drops in unison,
the glistening crimson reaper,
delving deep and deeper,
to end this cinematic masterpiece.
“Madcap, I”
Madcap I, hopeful I lie
in the world so cold and warm tonight
while all to they, frenetic with fright
and the budding wall screams fight
madcap I, madcap I, madcap I, not madcap You
madcap I, hopeful I lie
in the world so cold and warm tonight
while all to they, frenetic with fright
and the budding wall screams fight
madcap I, madcap I, madcap I, not a fool like you.
madcap I, hopeful I lie
in the world so cold and warm tonight
while all to they, frenetic with fright
and the budding wall screams fight
Madcap I, it seems i die.
“Dissociative Sense”
i see a walrus basking in the cool sun
junkie's feud with a local nun
bastard gunned in a hit and run
i hear a deer wail at the sight of light
baby's cries at the milk's not right
poacher scathed by the wolfen night
i taste a pheasant's loss of luck
caffeine's bliss for a mere buck
venison cringe at the premiere suck
i smell a llama dying in the sand
depressor's frail bleeding hand
pyro torching all your land
i feel a bat swooping in the breeze
hangman's rope fed tease
knife slitting with so much ease
and it all seems as nothing
in this dissociative state.
“Gloomy He Waits”
this impending doom
drowning in his room
far too gone with gloom
yet still dances for moonlights kiss
he's waiting for the sun to die
waiting for the children's cry
waiting for that passer-by
for his feast of the night
the doom draws near for those in sight
wading in the fog of hushed fright
wishing for more time to stay in light
but the moon approaches anyway
he rises in bliss
children cry, cats hiss
wolves howl
he starts to prowl
they run in fright
they're in his sight
cries so loud
mute in the cloud
too slow, too slow
too slow, too slow
far too slow, oh far too slow
he strikes and flees
dismissing the pleas
of the children dead on the trees
and he walks away
waiting for the sun to rise
as to wait for it to die again
commencing the feast over
but for now he waits
in his gloomy room
waving bye to the moon
“The Haunting Foretold”
i couldn't sleep last night
the noises,
the noises were ferocious and vile
oh all too, all too morbidly vile
they're haunting me
they, them, they haunt
the wicked ghosts here
i can't sleep, and neither can she
it has been foretold
she will die before the months close
i wish not to have a hand
but a hand in saving...
oh, but i'll be gone
gone gone gone
i'm always ever-gone
its oh so very haunting
she will die
death in chemical bliss
no! illicit hell it is
oh please no, let the haunting end
please don't let her die
tell me the ghosts lie
they lie! they lie!
the haunting is all a lie!
she will not die!
she will not die!
oh no, oh no, oh no
she will not fucking die.
“Ruby”
i can see it
feel it
watch it
tear away at my skin
the interweaving rivers that flood
red with blood
it feels good?
no, but not bad either
it feels like life
the reassurance
the existence
the communication
of life
it is the process
it is the meaning
it represents all that is
life
the pain, the strife
the ruby that is the essence of life
is it a Y or is it an X?
dripping down my arm
or the mountains droplets adorning the fore
with the strikes across my wrist
whats it all for?
nothing?
everything?
both it seems, for life is nothing
it is death really
and death is everything
the hurt
the loss
the touch
the taste
the scent
the sound
its all living
and its all set free
it won't kill
only birth
but just for an instant
til you die to live again
“Deer is Dead”
deer is dead
and brick is red
only redder with the blood
spread by the gun
from the bum
shot, leaving venison
dead as one
decayed in sun
not much fun
the bum's done
fleas without please
ditching game
for the sin he realizes
it's all too much
must repent
no way how?
the bricks all fit
his life of shit
from worse to worse
at the shrieks of caribou
the merry hairy who
gnawing bummy old shoe
shot, oh the disrespect
this bum is dumb
and how he dies
fleeing the scene
death so not serene
impaled in headlights
the red truck
his dead luck
dying like caribou
left as venison
like the beauty he took
and sprayed on a brick wall
so he took his fall
purely accidental
but seemingly fateful
his repent earned
by living, dying, deer
and deer is dead
as brick is red
but so is asphalt.
“This Life”
this life is strange
engulfed with desire
to engage the range
of enrage
this life is peculiar
filled with memories
lost by those familiar
but distant
this life is odd
encompassed through thoughts
mimicking the persona of god
and its all ours
we think that we know what to do
but we're not noticing if we do or don't
assuming what we've done is right
while the other begs to differ
we are all lost in mines of our design
seeking our own will to resign
hoping to dine
and embrace the arms divine
sadly forever dying to birth our own again
and again with our rampant heads
losing themselves without touch
believing what to do is right
only not ever knowing what to do
this life is unique
with its horrors and sorrows
on which we all shriek
and crave all the same
this life is amazing
even with all its walls
of confusion un-breaking
though the bricks fall
this life is love
we're not entirely certain
exactly what its of
but we want it anyway
“A Trilogy”
sorrow drowns the sensation of fright
submerged, cold and hollow
but i'm too dissociated to care
flooding the senses with nothing
bloated corpse of ill emptiness
the feelings simply aren't there
memories crash, falling short
remembering, but failing to feel
the world you can't live without
lost in ailing perception
the numbness blinds
muffles
murders
all anticipated bliss
sorrow drowns ever-present light
stripped in darkness to wallow
and discover how much i care.
---
it is time, for stormy weather
projecting the lightning to strike
burning out my last breath
---
simultaneously freezing and burning up
all is lost, all is lost
awful, but now clear
persistence of pain in time surely thrives
now subdued
overtaken, this can be
through the frigid cavernous maze
adorned with a single torch
that will surely be sought, reached, lit.
“Hollow”
hollow, hollow
hollowed ill tree
look on through me
nothing to see
nothing to see
it's all so very empty
all too uneasy
look and you will see
nothing, nothing in me
it's gone, you see
i look and see nothing
its all unreal
unreal you see
the hollow bears emptiness
what you see is not there (its not there you see)
its all too unfair you see
nothing is there to see
was it lost, or was it found?
its all there but its not
why can't it just be real
“Sometimes”
sometimes a faerie must die
a child will be stricken with sorrow
and that child will cry
but nothing else would happen
sometimes the son must depart
and never be heard of again
leaving a mother's broken heart
but that’s the only thing that breaks
sometimes the joker mustn't joke
as the crowd sits in horror
watching the laughingman choke
but they leave without a care
sometimes the happiness must fail
leaving melancholy to rise
and the tear falls aside the wail
but its never anything worth helping
sometimes the world must stop being
shedding all that exists from existence
for it is not worth existing
if it can't realize it died.
“To Rory”
your vision is obscured,
ever-present haze,
impossible to gaze,
clearly.
open your eyes,
its gotten much too thick,
free the fog and breathe,
you're not hated,
choose to believe,
and live, dearly.
“What is Death Like?”
i believe it to be bliss
the most ecstatic of all worldly sensations
offered only once, left never to be enjoyed
“Hell's Parade”
shoot me now motherfucker,
the devil is calling me to join him,
his parade appears all so inviting
proud gaiety exciting such energy
unity of what intense ecstasy
so shoot me, shoot me now
i really wish to join him,
submersed into the parade,
head-on for eternity
it seems such a joy
so shatter my heart dear boy
the devil has grasped my soul
and the parade is open
so shoot, shoot, shoot me now
and allow me to fall,
on the center stage
of this hellish parade.
“Your God in Black”
this is the creation,
relation,
devastation,
your very behavior,
savior,
holder of your prayer,
this is the web of fate,
your justified hate,
revolving mental state,
of the anguish,
anxiety,
grievance,
mistrust,
emptiness,
despair,
and gaiety,
this is the one being,
the ever-present all-seeing,
puppeteer of your leaving,
this is your suffering,
murdering,
self-righteous nourishing,
this is your being,
your life and your death,
this is your God in Black.
“Things”
now on to more important things
the better things with many things
to happenings and maddening things
for all the many things
that go on in this world of things
“Have Faith”
i have faith
faith is had
by the mad
until hanged in wraith...
“The Notion”
i've toyed with the notion, as you know
but the real deal, has been lost, to show
i honestly question my sanity
“Hope”
one could only hope
but hope is the hermits dope
to lead a frail man cope....
“Fear, the Sadist Divine”
dull, emotionless day
oh how i long for another way
an experience of feeling, not mold
merely a distinct, full, bold
the core is un-living, a real bore
with its anger, that fiery whore
the sorrow, oft unwanted snore
even excitement, not worth the pour
the spirit freeing the same all once
but near never in solo
i yearn for the sadist's touch
the glory filled frightening punch
oh that scrumptious little scare
and the man-shattering dare
its a rickety, wickedly vile hand
crushing the heart to strands of sand
smiting the itty pity, striking grief band
unleashing the fear so blissful and grand
freeing the spirit all in whole
yet controlling it in elegance
yearning, burning, for the bliss
only man-made wonders often miss
but the sadist does come
just too sporadically for some
and when he's present, it is known
for in your mind, its beautifully grown
you will cease to be, and simply are
controlling he may be, you will star
and be enlightened in brevity
as time slows back down
re-apprehending that crown
leaving you again to drown
hoping for this divine occurrence
to treat you once again
“Pierrot, the Drowning Man”
the well, the well
it's all gone red
and oh, and oh
i feel i am dead
oh why?, oh why?
can you not sense my dread?
i'm drowning, i'm drowning
and the sea is red
and the water, the water
it is all that i'm fed
can't you hear these words said?
i'm in the well, the well
and i'm drowning in dread
i see bricks, bricks
covering my head
and i'm drowing, drowning
in the sea while i'm dead
I am Pierrot, Pierrot
and i can see your hand
but why? but why?
must you seal over my head?
while i'm drowning, drowning
in the lightless red
and i'm dying, dying
as you watch me dead
can't you hear me?, hear me?
I am Pierrot and i'm drowning
but i'm not yet dead.
“Serious?”
could you take me serious?
unrivaled manic delirious?
speak to say, roar of laugh?
hurt the mind, split in half?
funny little spazzy star?
soul a twisted hollow jar?
sing a spastic holy war?
exciting fully loaded hatred store?
could you believe the mad?
see him smile, think it glad?
outrage of frantic mobility?
chilling whip of hostility?
could you take me serious?
pained dreadful delirious?
does the circus know?
the fiery glow is no show.
it burns this fragile heart
setting ablaze the start
trust in the cap,
and please don't snap
clean slow lurking mess
with one blessed yes.
“I Am”
I am the machine gun shooting you down
I am the smiling face making you frown
I am unhinged emotions that drain your soul
leaving it open, frail, and null
I am the magazine that fuels your lack of energy
I am the leach sucking cold your lost spirituality
I am the death-addled stench of life
leaving yours so full of strife.
“Good to Go”
you have a heart and soul,
and a functioning brain,
you´re good to go.
“Soulless City”
this soulless city only fuels the emptiness
the dark hollowed space once filled with bliss
how i just long for one sweet velvet kiss
one token from the girl i cant help but miss
they say anything is always better than this
but its never true, its all just static hiss
yet i follow and drift deeper into this abyss
leading me further into the soulless city of emptiness
“Soulless Man”
artificial he feels, breathes, is
here, there, where, now all his
that, this, whatever, he grins
everything and anything, his
he cares and knows, everything
he knows and cares, nothing
seeing, forgetting, remembering
it is all just lies
hearing, listening, rejecting
all of it, just lies
everything there is about him
just lies
this man, he has no soul
he deserves to die.
“Why Hate?”
why hate
accept your fate
we are all brothers, sisters, one
why hate and let the evil be done
choose not, and accept the fate
existence is granted to us all
equally
why waste it with hate
and allow it all to waste
“Ode to the Floor”
man i can dig the floor
i can soar on through the door
to my dreams, i can dig the floor
i'll get a head with wings and fly
so high so high in the dreamy sky
all on the floor man, give it a try
i can rest so perfectly, man on the floor
it just feels so good man it ain't a bore
something just calls from it like a shore
with a dock to perfect resting, man the floor
its static, plain, wonderful the floor
ain't bothered with all the frills man
not too comfortable man, not too much man
its just basic, not like the bed man
so i can dig the floor man.
“Jinn of Hell's Embrace”
i have seen the demons face
neon luminescent fangs
and a smile of twisted grace
golden horns, and a snarl
nothing out of place
this jinn of hells embrace
fading in and out of place
staring, with glowing eyes
and such a mean face
a cunning, aura of embrace
the dark void full coffins
and a spiraling cough
of orange, purple, red smoke
constant, breeze of toke
a blessed being of pain
strain, ingrained of rage
haunting, still, like of a cage
laughing menace of the night
filling the child's head of fright
and i call him Jin
he thrives in my sight
concerned with my plight
always with at omniscient site
and he dwells in my head
and sleeps in my bed
alive, with me, such dread
locked in my psyche
and will it ever pass
will it ever pass....
“New Friday's Boy”
arisen for the day in drunkards anguish
he lies in pain with the wish
longing for health and joy
a rescued life for the failed boy
his heads not off but it’s not right
with visions of life shadowed if bright
by the yearning for death in clearer sight
yet the boy exists, if only in fright
of the calm spitting sour before enjoyed
or the people who simply get annoyed
at anything he attempts to correct
or the truth he attempts to dissect
troubling his own mind he fails to collect
always losing to himself
allotting ill thoughts to invade
where canines scratch the frail frame
accumulating new bruises, wounds to never fade
striving to not waste and wallow in shame
but his bodies ailing and his mind may not return
stuck between the lost life and what can happen
rarely living the life frozen but trying to burn
away the fear of living and reach into heaven
regardless if in the death that evades him,
or the life he seeks to grasp.
“Still John”
floating in a river, downstream
you took us there, where
cellophane flowers grew astronomically high
and we soared on by, amidst glistening clouds
of diamonds
watching Sunday planes swoop by
and the taxis below
to where fields birthed berries, in Liverpool
and in new york city, so pretty
laying, chanting a peaceful melody
but running in your mind
lazily composing tunes with Henry the horse
and senor kite
singing them gay-fully with delight
no remorse
even jacked up with a voice so hoarse
yet aweing and amaze-ing us all
never to fall
or be let down
shunning a frown
and blue meanies
in ecstasy at the carnival of light
you midnight raver
pop a tab, speed up
the shows soon to begin
indulge once more in your earthly sins
as we all do, mister
take us once more to your old school
and flirt a bit, dig a pony
oh and don't forget good morning
or is it good moaning? groaning?
they're all crazy how could he be lazy?
now get up! shoot the gun once more
happiness is never a bore with you
just a lovely gay boy
only not in a cellar
but, chilling with his monkey
mother
all eight days of the week
abound in the void
where time flows
never passing, never dying
and yet she said he was...
and the doctor concurred...
we thought you were only sleeping
dreamweaving
but we were wrong
you we were the walrus
but now you're gone (still John)
“Wednesday, September 14, Around 4am, 2011”
it has always already been said
somewhere, if only in your head
it will always be the same as it was
only slightly off if you remembered
and you'll always remember to not put it in a song
for if you did it'll come out wrong
but still its always right
if you believe it can be
just always know whats true
i have always been a sad child
living, not dying, to bring a smile to you.
“Goodbye”
...and as Lilith appeared before me
glistening brightly in her descent
i knew my time was up
and she took me into her soft embrace
i felt at peace for once
drifting into the Elysium current
as the waves came crashing down
here i drown, serene
goodbye.
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