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A girl who dies from a broken heart. View table of contents...
Submitted: Mar 2, 2008 Reads: 122 Comments: 17 Likes: 1
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i envy your writing ability ):
Posted: Mar 2, 2008
I loved it i would love to read more of your work that was beautiful and i rewad your last comment you are that good!!!!!!
Posted: Mar 3, 2008
Nice job, I like the flow, every word just fell off of my tongue! ~ Nixie
Posted: Mar 4, 2008
haha your really damn good!
Posted: Mar 9, 2008
That was amazing, and I'd love to read some of your other stuff. I love this kind of poetry, it just calls out to me. You did a really great job and put a lot of emotion into it. Great job. :)
Posted: Mar 13, 2008
verry good. you're quite the talented one
Posted: Mar 21, 2008
This is going to sound like a stupid question (and I am full of those) but are you open to constructive criticism?
Posted: Mar 27, 2008
I would never slam a writer. As the Russians say, that would be "nekulturny". I will start out by saying that your writing is very impressive. Your vocabulary, imagery, in short, your style is excellent. If there is one thing that I have discovered from running a creative writing club at my school, it is that you can very often tell the age of the writer by the content. I have not read all of your stuff yet (working on it, but have to prepare for tomorrows lessons!), but I am seeing a bit of a theme. The dark, broken hearted writings, which there seems to be plenty, usually point out an author of a certain age group. Of course, if that is also the audience you want to reach, then it works out great! I really do like your writing. I just wanted to point out that a recurring theme will limit your audience. I will shut up now. I assume you quit reading about 100 words ago. You know the old saying about everyone having opinions...:)
Posted: Mar 27, 2008
Oh this is real good.
Posted: Mar 31, 2008
this is really good, i could really feel the emotion you tried to express!! You're such a great writer!! Great Poem@
Posted: Apr 12, 2008
HeeHee! likes it, likes it, likes it!
(ops, thinks Iz had too much sugar!)
Posted: Apr 16, 2008
Gave it a "i Like it", Birdie
though I had to flip pages of dictionary for the meaning of some of the words.....
WoW ....
Posted: Apr 18, 2008
Looking at the comments, I see that you said you wrote this when you were a little younger. I can see that, but there is alot of insight into your heart ache. I like it.
Posted: Apr 19, 2008
okay firstly, umm... what does Ameliorate, Asphyxiated, and pulchritudinousmean? other than that, this was another very good poem of yours! but one more thing, im not that 'a heart wounded many times by a knife' was very appropriate in this poem. i mean like that this was a poem was about a broken heart shattered by loss of hope, etc. so she was not murdered... i understand that this was figurative language, but perhaps just a little too gigurative? if that makes any sense, lol! anyway, very very good! i especially liked "Her heart just couldn’t take it,
Her smile, she couldn’t fake it,"... that was... deep! thats the word! lol,
Posted: May 13, 2008
Wow, this is great. Powerful- even kind of sad. i am humbled by your ability.
Two thumbs up.
Love
Ashleigh
Posted: May 14, 2008
wow! It is so sad but original and very good
Posted: Jun 29, 2008
err...kindda late to comment...hehe...but i loved it!
you're really talented!
nuttyz~
Posted: Jul 10, 2008
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Other writing by Alice Oiseau Let Me Be Your Willow December Stained in Autumn Her Four Seasons More..
Love, Poetry, Death, Life, Poem, Romance, Pain, Fantasy, Hope, Sad, Sex, Hate, God, Horror, War, Humor, Hurt, Sadness, Loss, Dark, Fiction, Depression, Heart, Family, Friendship.