why didn't you let me go?

i sat on my bed

thinking of what i fear

wondering why i'm still here

wasn't i supposed to be dead?

why didn't you let me go ?

why did you say no?

i know my death would've hurt you

but me staying alive hurts too

you would be happy when i'm alive

but i wouldn't when again my pain will arrive

i don't want to give up

but the empty black hole inside me wants me to stop

i'm gonna fall down on my knees and i'll never be able to reach the top

i'm tired

i'm sick of everything

i'm weak

oh god how much i wish i was a statue

so maybe i wouldn't have to think about you

but i don't know what are you and who

where are you and how do i know you

if i try to climb the mountain

i'll fall down back where i first started

i'll feel the pain that once hurted

and now i'm back in the dark dream

the one with the endless tunnels

stone walls that slid by cold under my fingertips

sadness a heavy salt in my mouth

fear ringing loud bells in my ears

i felt my way in th dark

tracing small figures and words

curved in to the tunnel walls

these messages are what people say to me everyday

i can't see or hear anyone

but i can read what you say to me

through the next line curved in the rock

that's how i understand what people want

what they say to me

and what i'm supposed to see

but i'm tired of it all

i always hear an echo

cuz in this tunnel i'm alone

in air that smelled of damp stone and mildew

i wish at least i could see a shadow

i wonder again why didn't you let me go

i could've took the short path

and i could've slept in heaven

instead of going through this tunnel

but i'm too late now

and i can't get out of it

cuz i don't know how

why didn't you let me go?

why did you say no?