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Forever and never, beyond my words

Poem By: Anna Therese
Poetry


My end product to the HILARIOUS Challenge - finally - my title "Forever and never, beyond my words" - I had to think a bit before the poem "came" - hope I did it some justice. View table of contents...

 

Submitted: Jun 15, 2008    Reads: 71    Comments: 18    Likes: 13   


Do you see the breathing soul, beyond my words?
(Do I see yours?)
 
Do you sense my aura only (or not at all)?
glimpse if I am gentle, happy, clever, angry
or do my words stop on the page
revealing merely
words?
 
Do you see a lonely child, beyond my words?
lost and dreaming in jungles of eucalypts
drowned in the anonymity of bustling city streets
a little girl who doesn’t understood
why people grow old and die and leave you
weeps, craves her mothers arms
always
 
Do you see the painful secrets, beyond my words?
the past mistakes,
the writhing, sorry mess of
wild disloyal endeavours,
unfulfilled dreams
words that never emerge
bleeding backyard addictions
 
Do you see the compassionate core, beyond my words?
a strange woman placing roses on forgotten graves
saddened, touched by mans’ inhumanity to fellow man
a tear in the eye always for Diana
and Marilyn
and JFK
and tsunami victims…
 
You may see the breathing soul when I write with truth?
without inhibition, naked, flung to you from my depths
 
but beware
sometimes I lie!
the words come from somewhere
other than my heart
I pluck them mercilessly from imagination’s endless realms
paint them lighter, brighter, darker, deeper
than my reality
(or do I?)
 
Forever and never,
beyond my words.


13

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Comments:

Irwin
(not registered user)

I think this is superb. I really do love it. I know it strikes a chord with me but the structure of the piece is so effortlessly carried out by a very deft pen.I also wonder what people glean about me from my writing and whether I am right about what I get from others.

Posted: Jun 15, 2008

Author Comment:

Glad you liked this one Irwin - I wrote it very "speedily" once the idea set in and that usually makes for a half good poem (the ones you pnder too long over are usually stilted and cumbersome)
Despite my query in the poem I think often a "sense" of the writer is gleaned from their words? You strike me as very much a thinker who stores things away about people and places and behaviour and events and then writes about them instictively and with enormous perception!

Oh, I could talk about this subject all day. I always wonder what people make of me from my writing! Lol! Now, I'm wondering about you too? :) I love the way this ended and you're right, we can never be sure about a person online, but we can never be sure about a person in real life either. I've known somebody for more than 20 years and they've recently changed a lot on me. Or so it seems. Great Poem Anna! It alwasy seems so effortless for you.

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

Lacey thank you so kindly - it is endlessly fascinating isn't it, reading somebody, never really knowing...
This one took me a while to "get the spark" but when it came flowed well. Thanks!

Oh so very nice, Anna!!! A beautiful flow to it. I have been working on a piece for the last couple of days with a similar theme. It's about believing in what someone actually does rather than in what they say. I may never finish it now after reading your wonderful poem!! Perhaps I'll change it to an essay or article!! Who knows... LOL!!!

Forever and never... NO! Forever and 'ALWAYS'.....Jerry

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh no Jerry, please complete - your writing is always a delight to me. Glad you liked this one and the theme is a very pertinent one to us all (Thanks Hilarious!) - one we would all ponder at various times as writers.

Very good one ! I now see a lot after read your poem.

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

What do you see Jbortti? Thanks for reading and lovely comment as always.

Change is inevitable. Personalities change as we grow along with life, our perspectives change. Sometimes we think others change, but we do too. My style in writing for the past 15 years or so has changed so much! Back when I first started to write, it had such a sweet and innocent tone. Then, by the time I was 15, I was angry at the world, and so it was the tone in most of my poetry. Now, that I'm in my 30s, again perspective of life has changed, and so has my words.

Anyway, Anna, a very thought-provoking poem. Very well done. Hiralarious should love it!! I know I do.

MA

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

I'm glad this provoked thought MA. The title provoked the original thought however so thumbs up to Hilarious. Thank you.

Wow, I love this poem. It flows so smoothly and, as MA said, it's very thought-provoking. Hiralarious should really like it. Please let me know when you have a new poem up. :)

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much findingmy way - my next poem may possibly be another challenge one as I've plunged in to two more challenges recently. I will let you know when to find them.

Fantastic poem! You definitely did the line justice. Yes, I definitely felt the breathing soul beyond your words :) Wow, I never knew that the text in parentheses could be so effective in delivering emotions.

One pet-peeve of mine is that I really dislike exclamation marks in poetry haha, it is really a matter of opinion but to me it always seems like an exclamation mark is trying to make the reader feel something that isn't there.

This was a great poem! :D Keep up the good work.

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

I LOVE your comment about the exclamation marks - my creative writing teacher says I use them FAR to often. She says the sentence should speak for itself and not require one. For me, it is an excitement, emphasis kind of thing - which could cover a lot when you get constantly excited like I do when writing!!!!!!!! Very good point though, use sparingly.

WOW!!! ANNA, this is AMAZING! extraordinair*******
Yes, I think we do see through a persons writing but just how much tends to each person separate knowing.

Anna truly this is a fabulous speaking poem! Thankyou, thankyou and oh of course THANKYOU HILARIOUS!! Anna it is a pleasure to get to know you better ^_^ wishes and peacefulness to you ~katie

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

katie thanks for your generous and glowing comments as always - a gracious fan. I think people may know a lot of my writing is very personal (or no?? I'm an awful tease!)

WOW - that's really all I can manage to say right now. You have me speechless. This was marvelous Anna!!!! I seriously think this is my favorite of yours!
Absolutely positively beautiful :)

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

Alice, so glad you liked it. A beautiful accolade from you, I am most flattered.

I can't stop reading it and it just SOARED into my favourite list of poetry. I fell a little in love with it!!

Divine.

Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

Classy you are so sweet. Soared is a great word by the way! I just posted another challenge response but this one is very different! Has a "Dorothy Porter" feel and "harshness" (I think?)

DEAR ANNA, PLEASE FEEL THIS JUMBO SIZE HUG....

...NOW....

I honestly hate when people change for their selfishness and A CHANGE WHICH MAKES SOMEONE A BETTER PERSON is always always WELCOME....well i hope it made sense...

GEEZ, i am getting carried away from the main theme....

I am so happy that I can relate to so many of you in BOOKSIE though we have and probably would never meet in person

BUT BUT...BUT...

I PRAY TO ALMIGHTY TO KEEP OUR FRIENDSHIP INTACT TILL I AM ALIVE....

here i go again.....

Posted: Jun 17, 2008

Author Comment:

I feel your warmth Pratibha very much.
Did you read irwin's "goodbye" poem? A bit said and down about booksie.

Hey Anna, I was trying to figure out which my favourite lines in this poem are. Then I realized that it is impossible to pick any, since all of them are so good! I absolutely LOVED this poem. I especially like the way the poem flowed in a gentle way, meandering along the coasts of past, and then suddenly it plunged into the valley of doubt, but smoothed over to flow again as a gentle river. Amazing!

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

Urja you describe the pattern of this poem beautifully. For a "challenge" poem I was lucky enough to cop a "workable" title.

Anna you are an amazing writer and have a way with words. They express your feelings which you share so well.

Posted: Jun 19, 2008

Author Comment:

Thank you for your lovely compliment - I really enjoyed writing this one which helps.

I think it's so easy to read more into things than there really is, it can lead to assumptions, and trouble. Me, I'm nosey! lol I can't help but analyse words, and i often do it without realising. I can only imagine what people make of me... but that's the thrill of being a writer I guess? Ha!

I loved this Anna, sparked a little curiosity in me. :) ~ Nixie

Posted: Jun 19, 2008

Author Comment:

Aha! Curiosity is good but never quite satisfied I don't think? Poets can be very transparent or very coy!

Brillaint job! Sorry it took so long to read, but I'm really glad I did read this (:

Posted: Jun 20, 2008

Author Comment:

Glad you managed to come in and have a read - it is hard getting around everyone. I think I was lucky with my title for the challenge. Thank you!

Just reading again.
Still loving it!

Posted: Jun 22, 2008

Author Comment:

Glad this is a "second time" read. I enjoyed writing it. Thanks Classy!

Wow this reminds me so much of Pablo Neruda, these lines especially:

You may see the breathing soul when I write with truth?
without inhibition, naked, flung to you from my depths

but beware
sometimes I lie!
the words come from somewhere
other than my heart
I pluck them mercilessly from imagination’s endless realms
paint them lighter, brighter, darker, deeper
than my reality

i know this is not a love poem but these lines remind me of Neruda's love poems.
I love your structure and the emphasis on truth, words, feelings, there something of love and trust in there. Stunning work which i will read over and over

Posted: Jun 24, 2008

Author Comment:

Matthew yours was such a generous and gratifying comment. Encourages me to keep writing, something I do so love but has to "fit in" around all the other essentials. My fantasy would be to live to write!

Wow! Another great poem...beautiful!

You just never know about someone truly. Very true, how you never really know a person. You might have known them for years, and one day boom!! A big blow of what you thought you knew, to what you thought you would never see or know. If that made sense...lol!!

Funny how you think you know someone, they give commitments, loyalty, and over time? It was all a lie!!

Well written!

Posted: Jun 24, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much for reading Kred. Some people change too! Relationships change. I wonder often what lies "behind" an author.



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