Three Poems On Death Loving
I cannot deny that I love you ,
Which it seems nothing at all what I am suffering and given .
A little? Was it enough to leave you now in this dark, cold grave?
In flash, I could say anymore for which these precipitous death-endings have left me shaking.
In front of this black cloud that is covered the fine pain of your eyes.
Now I did not know what to do, seeing your there, lay there, in this taciturn afternoon,
Listening the Priest who want to convince me that you
Will become the ashes of the sea. These words implied nothing
To me, that maybe he has never understood the other’s love,
Or before the rights of forgiven passion.
I should decide today, keep coming here, sitting here
As if I were a baby-sitting or loading my tears to fix the last problems
That is still unresolved as the beginning our last ending.
The Last Full-Front Goodbye
At other times, I will be able to hide my face with tears,
Avoiding confrontation with God, following that value
Of life as a recycle and a far-off you will return one day or I will meet you in Heaven.
Not alarmed by the more real realities of what I am here now
Beside this immobile body that appears to be above the ground of carnal moves.
In grief, standing before this, I am trying to understand
This kind of internal blows if I have done all I could to give more,
For that human who seems intact by the time I hold. Or if my love was just many
Or an anticipated demand of garden feeling unbroken by storms.
There is nothing wrong with having tears across my face; thinking
If I have all I could of being a good lover, if I have done all I could to save
The last bed covered with flowers, if my last emotional orgasm
Under no obligations to be rational or even emotional attached to it,
I did it all right to satisfy our body in motion.
Only I know I am standing there alone, watching an immobile lover
Who appears to listening with the eyes close
In the last balance as a body in motion would be able to give.
Lost In Loss
When my lover asked me
If there would be a moment
A remember and being the last
I could not reply to myself
If I can do that.
Only I know recalled
To say that grief never
Really goes away
And much like fear,
To see these big eyes
Empty; I know there was pity
To see a dying fire
Dies away in vain.
I changed words
Not hold the time only makes
It upside down for these
I could not inhabit in the same
Body going backwards
Or otherwise instead to recover
To hope it seems senseless
That lover is dying.
That lover repeated
The words, “I will die soon and promise me
You’re going to remember me forever!”
And the grip of these words
Upon my eyelids made this last
Encounter so difficult.
I tried to move away
Going to another places
Another thoughts and another time
Where both of us were running
And laughing but that lover insisted
That I should swear that I would be faithful
In such a way that love will end
Before that lover’s eyes