nothing has changed

I am overcome with a since of dread,

I cant find the will or strength to live,

I'm alone

no one can save me, cure me or change me.

To many starved days, too many sleepless nights

I cant live in this skin, this life, this family is not mine.

I don't deserve it, I've been betrayed

left in the cold, on the side of the road,

No shoulder to cry on, no ear to listen

no person to understand

or change what will happen.

so here I cry, alone at night

tear streaked face and stony eyed,

face bleached white, from tears I cried,

This will end, but not tonight,

I try to fight, but its not alright!

I cant go a day without him by my side,

I sleep because I have faith, blinded, yes, but I feel safe.

I imagine us, you, your beautiful eyes,

you'll kiss my tears and admit your lies

But when I awake, nothing is changed,

your still gone and I'm alone, no piece of hope, to grasp onto

no piece of love to keep me whole, or reason for this life,

to still live on.