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This is about a southern girl who finally has set herself free from the haunting thoughts of a guy who doesn't return feelings of love. I hope you enjoy. View table of contents...
Submitted: Jul 13, 2008 Reads: 116 Comments: 33 Likes: 13
Summer -
Mosquito bites,
Capturing lightning bugs,
Gazing up at the night-time stars,
Wishing that I had you right beside me
To wrap your arms around me tight,
Share ice-cold lemonade.
But realize it's....
Summer.
A southern summer.
My southern summer.
Summer
To let you go
And stop wasting my time,
Becoming happy once again.
And peacefully gaze at the night-time stars.
Setting free the trapped fireflies.
Bitten by summer bugs,
I realize it's....
Summer.
A southern summer.
My southern summer.
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I liked it. Shows independence and Im and independent girl, even though we all would like someone beside us. I enjoyed it. =) Mandy
Posted: Jul 13, 2008
It's fine. You kind of express your thought about what summer is like. In my place, summer is usually the rainy season. Kind of the opposite. But it sounded to me like spring time (maybe because the color reminds me of the flowers that really grow during spring, which are usually yellow and orange,)
~scaza~
Posted: Jul 13, 2008
this is really well written, in my opinion...and I can definitely feel what you described...I know it must have been tough for the girl to finally let go of that someone who just would not return her love...I have had to let go so many times in my life...in the past...it's hard...but it takes many tries to finally capture your "beautiful Summer"....funny, lately I have been pondering my own thoughts of eventually finding my soulmate or at least meeting that someone to return feelings of real lasting love...I am a bit pessimistic when it comes to romance, but I truly always have such an open heart-like, in other words, I have been doing a bit of dreaming lately....and I always wonder....when? If? :D
Posted: Jul 13, 2008
Yes, it's your summer... it's your time... it's your life! Set the fireflies free as you set yourself free once again. Happy writing, reading and commenting.....Jerry
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
i never know what summer's like. but from your poem i take it that it's a much-loved season, and very inspirational. Great poem:)
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
I love this piece though there is a bit touch of sadness. But it also speaks about moving on. Nice one, Susan! :-)
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
Very nice...
'Setting free the trapped fireflies.'
What a wonderful metaphor.
A yummy poem.
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
oo, i like that.
L ♥
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
I like this poem. It reminds me of where I used to live.
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
i like it keep up the good work
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
hi! f. can i call it our summer. i enjoy mosquitoes too (when they r not biting me!) this is the best season among all - v canadians should know. loved it. lol. ;-)
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
I liked it! It had this bittersweetness to it that I loved. xD Great job Susan!
~!~Megan~!~
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
AND I AM HAPPY THAT THIS SWEET GIRL FOUND HER NICHE...
It's not worth wasting time and energy over a guy who doesnot understand...will he ever be able to be the perfect life partner which this innicent girl is searching for? NOPE never...it would be like playing with thorns...and this sweety deserves roses and only roses...
A decision taken in time and a brave one that too...there should no regrets ....
her prince charming who would love her and only her for what she is and not what she could be...would come ONE DAY for sure...all she has to do is wait with patience and trust GOD...
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
two words: awesomely awesome! lol. this was real good! and this is mostly in rictameter, right? and if it is, you're good at it. i mean, big time good! =)
~Lemon
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
I liked it. :) really good. :)
Love the format, too. Can't remember for the life of me what that format is called, which is funny, being a poet myself.
but I really enjoyed this, I'm someone who camps a lot so I understand the peaceful tranquility of summer and the annoyance of bugs ;)
great read!
Xx Ash xX
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
There's a lot of strength in it, gives me that get up and go feel after the aftermath of a break up. You've done well to get those feelings across, love it! ~ Nixie
Posted: Jul 14, 2008
well written , really enjoyed it , not a lady to cross obviously , i love that in any woman .
terry
Posted: Jul 15, 2008
A lovely piece, letting go, it's always really hard and especially when the feelings were not mutual. If you haven't already you should read my short story "Letting go and Letting go Michaels version."
Otherwise...loved this
Posted: Jul 15, 2008
Being in the midst of a southern summer myself, I could really relate to things like summer bugs and ice-cold lemonade! ;)
This was really beautiful, Susan. I like the combination of wistful sadness and independence that you express. The repetition of the line "My southern summer" shows strength, and gives the poem a sense of possesiveness, as if the speaker is taking control over both the season and herself. Very lovely!
Stephanee :)
Posted: Jul 15, 2008
wow such a lovely poem and great images. i can almost imagine gazing up at the stars on a summer evening with someone i love!! I love the structure too, it's different and thats a good thing, it flows really well. A wonderful read Susan, great stuff!
Posted: Jul 15, 2008
I liked it. You convey a real sense of independance and freedom and the colours work really well the summer theme.
'With summer brings freedom mentally, physically and emotionally...bring on summer', wwwwoooohhhhooooo!! Lol!
Keep up the good work,
Olola.
Posted: Jul 15, 2008
so nice and peacefull my friend! very nice!
happy days! ooh and do find the time to check out my new poem "free to dance"
Posted: Jul 15, 2008
The last 2 lines really made it all click, it was so very very lovely it is peacefull and calming... it is a very free poem!
Posted: Jul 15, 2008
Hi Susan: I love "Setting free the trapped fireflies". Its like setting all those lost hopes free. Great poem!
Posted: Jul 16, 2008
Very lovely.
Keep it up my friend!
Keep writing! :)
Posted: Jul 16, 2008
Lovely piece - for it is not so much about the season but about enjoying it anew. Nicely written, sweet.
Posted: Jul 17, 2008
misquito bites... grrr lol i hate those
hahaha
great poem! i enjoyed it and it was a great read :)
so many wonderful images!
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
that was so nice!
and the imagery........esp. about the mosquito bites was pretty good!
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
Hey findingmyway :)
I agree, the imagery is awesome! You caught the feelings of a southern summertime perfectly. Your structuring was also well done (even the font color changes added to the spice of the poem). Wonderful work from a wonderful poet :)
Regan
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
Excellent Job. I really like this poem. You really give a good image there and a message of breaking free and finding happiness in yourself. :)
Posted: Jul 21, 2008
u got the feelings across very well this was a good read!
Posted: Jul 22, 2008
Susan, I really enjoyed this poem. Your imagery was great.. I could see the fireflies just as clear.. It reminds me of my grand daughters catching them in jars thinking they had fairy's and asking if they could keep them forever. {still brings a smile} Summer is my favorite time of the year.
Posted: Aug 3, 2008
I can feel and taste the summer, which by the way is my fav season. Your use of imagery is stunning!
Great work!
Posted: Sep 5, 2008
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