But Now...

I thought I was strong enough to depend on myself

never fully adjusting myself in order to close the other eye

for the fear of...

the terror of-

trusting the words that ensure the promise of safety

resting in place and not circling in motion

But now...

it started slow you see,

it molests my mind and travels through me

the chest is heavy

the back aches from carrying self created bundles

I'm a figure of ash about to collapse

the daydreams burning me out

Descisions, I made myself believe were for the better

I doubt with a passion

because I'm too confused

I can't do it anymore

I don't want to rely on myself anymore

I'm ready to rest on the velvets and silks

to find what I've depserately needed

to confide