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HIS MAJESTY

Poem By: jadey oneil
Poetry


I came up with this poem in response to Lydia's challenge. I asked 7 words of 10 (maximum)and chose 7 for the level of difficulty. Thus, she provided me with these:

1. critic
2. tempting
3. falling
4. positive
5. sensitive
6. relax
7. will-power

Honestly, it was with the word "relax" that I struggled a lot. I could not seem to find a poetic line that contained it and could make a sensible thought to this piece. Please feel free to leave your comments. They are most welcome. Thanks! ^^
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Submitted: Jun 18, 2008    Reads: 80    Comments: 23    Likes: 11   


Amid the ocean of different faces;

Prying eyes of public critics had her nailed on;

Casting silent omen of dreadful events,

Cursing for stealing the noble crown.

* * *

 

For such a gem as tempting as a sin;

She had her charmed heart in command;

Harsh judgment became her twin;

That must be the fault of Venus' son.

* * *

 

When those filthy words escaped to condemn;

Her thoughts of positive conviction understood;

Her bleeding sensitive heart took all the blame;

She was the imagery of every poet’s romantic ode.

* * *

 

Love made her a slave of her own emotion;

Struggling and battling each and every day;

She was no equal to the object of her affection;

He was the father of his land, the ruler of his nation.

* * *

 

Captivated by his humble heart and strong will-power;

She was another Wallis Warfield Simpson;

Touching the solid band of gold around her finger;

His majesty had bravely abdicated his throne.

* * *

 

Two lovely couple falling into the trap called “love”,

Lived their lives with passion to hold on,

and with freedom to soar like the highest flying dove,

Feeling relaxed and calm, their journey began.
 


11

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Comments:

You always write good poems, Jadey. I liked this one alot.

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

and you have always been prompt to air out your comment. Thanks a bunch, Susan! ^^

a beautiful love story ^^ i found it interesting the way you described love as a "trap" and how it made her a "slave" - because normally when you think of love, you don't have those images. so this was new and different to me - which i liked a lot. i always love it when someone steps outside the box and tries something different ^^ love really takes a hold of us, and you can fall head over heels like in this poem. she fell head over heels for this man and i saw it as both of them running away together forever :D
quite romantic in my opinion ^^

keep up the lovely writing jadey!!

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

WOW! ^^ I always admire your deep comprehension and great observation, Alice! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. ^^

aaawwwww!!!!!! so sweet! great job!

Lydia_xxxx

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks! ^^

I thought this was so sweet! The king abdicated his throne in order to marry a commoner... *sigh* I guess love sweeps all of us off our feet, even a king! ;) Beautiful poem, Jadey.

Stephanee

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

It's sweet and it happened once...in real life. ^^
Thanks, Steph!

Aw, this is lovely, and how deep! You always impress me! I wish i could write so beautifully! ~ Nixie

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

Of course, you can! I've read yours and they're deep and impressive. ^^

Thanks, Nixie! ^^

That was good. My favorite line was the very last one. "Feeling relaxed and calm, their journey began." It had a nice feel to it. Nice job.

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

Really? That amazed me. That's the same line I felt so uncertain about because I just didn't know if it sounded right. It took me so much time thinking how to incorporate the word "relax" in the last line. But you liked it. Oh, thanks, Lacey! ^^

Wow I'm very impressed Jadey..this is such a great poem. Awesome job.

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh, Thanks! ^^

See this box *points to it.* we think inside that box, you think outside it *points to space with tons of floating planets and stars*
~KAori

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

So flattering, Kaori. ^^

Our imagination is as vast as the universe. If we try to go further, we'll always discover something new and something different. We, all, are capable to do that if we give it a try. Let's get lost in our thoughts sometimes and let's see where it leads us to. ^^

Thanks, Kaori!

You knocked the challenge Jadey....I loved this piece.

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks, Deb! ^^

Feeling relaxed and calm, their journey began.

this is my fav line...how lucky they are to 'discover and experience' true love ever and ever....forever....

I wish i too could write such beautiful lines....

this poem takes us slowly from "ONCE UPON A TIME" to "AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER"

U know what ?? ONE DAY UR PRINCE WOULD COME JUST LIKE UR POEMS AND SWEEP U OFF UR FEET and TAKE U FAR FAR AWAY TO THE LAND OF PROMISES, FAITH, LOVE, DEDICATION, and UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND SUPPORT.....AMEN !

DOn't forget ur friends on Booksie then and NEVER NEVER STOP WRITING AT ANY POINT OF TIME IN UR LIFE.....

Posted: Jun 18, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh, Thanks, Pratibha! Your words are always inspiring. ^^ Know what? You and Lacey seemed to like the same line. I never thought such line has that kind of impact on you. Thanks again! ^^

Wow,that was awesome.You wrote reallly great great great poem!! Its beautiful.I cant belive,you have very good imagination!Great job! :)

Posted: Jun 19, 2008

Author Comment:

Aw, Thanks! ^^

well done with the challenge!
i just started on mine and working on others!!

Posted: Jun 19, 2008

Author Comment:

Inform me when you're done with yours. Thanks! ^^

HA! I loved it! really good work :)...lalalalalala I'm so happy now. Lol

Posted: Jun 19, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks, Angela! ^^

Absolutely wonderful writing!

Posted: Jun 19, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks! ^^

Ah the "trap" and what we will do when ensnared. I'm caught up in the ocean of faces watching your couple. I don't judge; I see bravery and love. Well done.

Posted: Jun 19, 2008

Author Comment:

Yes, bravery and love. ^^
Thanks! ^^

Jadey, you have done justice to a difficult choice of words. You have written a poem which is grand, touching as well as romantic. I could picture Wallis Simpson way before you specifically mentioned her, and that goes to show how well you have managed to portray your characters. I’ve got to read more of your works now.

Posted: Jun 20, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh, I never expected this could interest you into reading more of my stuff. Perhaps, I should thank Wallis for that. LOL! Thanks, Urja!

Interesting poem! To have it from the perspective of the mistress and not the king or queen makes it especially intriguing. And that there is love despite all of the other things going wrong. At first I thought of Anne Bolyn because I just watched the movie, but then the abdicating part and Simpson brought it even more modern. What a sad story! but a lovely poem. :-)

Posted: Jun 20, 2008

Author Comment:

Anne Boleyn was involved with Henry VIII while Wallis Simpson was with Edward VIII. The poem was somehow like Wallis-Edward lovestory. I found it more romantic than Anne's. But I think Anne-Henry story was never romantic at all. It was about power and lust. Well, I'm basing it on the movie. ^^ What do you think? Thanks, em ! ^^

Jadey, this is a marvelous read. I totaly enjoyed the wording and metaphors. ^_^
~katie

Posted: Jun 20, 2008

Author Comment:

It always makes me happy that I satisfy my readers. Your comment means a lot. Thanks Katie! ^^

Aw, sweet ending! I enjoyed this Jadey, great job! ~ KB

Posted: Jun 20, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks! ^^

Really good job Jadey. I like this a lot. It really paints a picture in the mind. Excellent job. :)

Posted: Jun 21, 2008

Author Comment:

Glad that you liked it, Michael. Thanks! ^^

ouuu, you did a great job with thte challenge! I really really liked it, bravo!
Steph(:

Posted: Jun 21, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks! ^^

love is the wicked dream of those who cannot fathom the void of reality.

Posted: Jun 23, 2008

Author Comment:

It may be true. It may be not. It always depends on the circumstance at hand. Thanks for dropping by, Wolffe! ^^

you killed the challenge for sure :]

Posted: Jul 14, 2008

Author Comment:

Hahaha! ^^
Thanks for commenting,dubl. :-)



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