look at the positives

Well, maybe you did dress up in leather

but you still look like Heather

from Eastenders

fucking horrendous

wake up next to that in the morning

almost choke to death when yawning

and hope it's not your kids she's spawning

or your t-shirt she's adorning...

Well, maybe it is the long route you're taking

forsake all others in mistakes that you're making

getting mistook instead of mistaken

and cannot believe your eyes when you waken

dash out the door

hell for leather

completely unsuitably dressed for the weather

and definitely not destined to end up together...  

-----------------------------------------------------------

'Look at the positives she said

you hear this voice going round in your head

we're a long time dead

and it's only a little fun in a bed'              

Well, back out again the following night

bump into Heather, get into a fight

after a few tequilas she looks quite alright

even though her clothes fit too tight

you jump in a taxi cab together

avoid the poor weather

you take her to yours

which isn't too clever...

-----------------------------------------------------------

'Look at the positives you think

she won't demand diamonds and mink

it's just the occasional shag and a drink

and when she gets dumped won't kick up a stink'

Well, ugly girls get pregnant too

not just by you

or a select few

and suddenly you regret the quick screw

you're feelin' quite sick but not sure whether

you're under the weather

or in love with Heather

and now you are bonded by blood forever...

-----------------------------------------------------------

'Look at the positives she screams

none of this is as bad as it seems

cos you ain't exactly the man of her dreams

and you don't look as great as you think in them jeans'

Well, you are forced to look at the positive things

while she's upstairs taking a bath she sings

you're searching the Argos catalogue for rings

and pondering what tomorrow brings

she's splashing around like a beached whale in Dover

her positive future is sunshine and clover

you think your future is pretty much over

a struggle for cash to fill up your Nova

-----------------------------------------------------------

'Look at the positives your mind begs

you still have your sight and your arms and your legs

she may have the figure of three overfilled kegs

but she is quite happy to settle for dregs'

Well, you sit back and watch water drip thru' your ceiling

it gives you a nauseous fluttery feeling

in a strange kinda way she's kind of appealing

and suddenly now your heart she is stealing

you look outside at the piss poor weather

ponder the life you have chosen together

reflect on your actions that you thought were clever

and accept your life as 'the dregs and Heather'...

'Look at the positives'