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I breathed the air of summer

Poem By: matthew smith
Poetry


Ok i thought long and hard before posting this. It was written a while ago now when i lived by the sea. It was my observation of those sun worshipers. View table of contents...

 

Submitted: Jun 9, 2008    Reads: 86    Comments: 8    Likes: 6   


I breathed the air of summer standing there,
The wax of human thought.
I dreamed the summer madness of their cries,
The sand-less creatures brought.
I see the summer colours of their skin,
Melting of the waters.
Splashing in the madness of their eyes,
Haunter of the winter sun.
Chained to the garland of an empty sea
Spilling green entrails,
Porter of the thunderous sun; I watch
The beasts of summer tides,
Losing flesh that soaks the yellow skies.
Praising in their holy song,
Enjoying the summer sun while it rides
The flesh along the shore,
A fleeting moment in a motionless
Throng of screaming gulls.
A calling for summer in that fleeting
Air, I am pulled into their
Song, dancer of the starlight shade;
Dancing in the still waters,
Foaming in the birth of a new tide,
Flesh like jellyfish, pink
And soon to smoulder in the ashes of
A burnt out summer sun.


6

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Comments:

"Dancer of the starlight shade". Wow Matt! I completely love this and keep picking out parts that I like even more the second and third time around. Once again it is so full of detail and remarkable pharasing that it really needs to be read over and over again. Don't be surprised if I come back and comment again. :) I really do love this one.

Posted: Jun 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Oh thanx Sisi, u know i was unsure about posting it for some reason. Maybe because i wrote it awhile ago, or that i thought it made me sound a little shallow in my thoughts on those who worship the sun. But now i'm glad i posted it. I love dancing in the shade of stars! U should come with me one night!

iS this ever morbid! This is unlike your poetry!

I felt like I was sinking while I read it. (i am a beach girl).
ok, well....you are obviously telling us that you wait for the searing heat to pass and that's when you really cherish nature. you take your rise when the commoners have passed.

Awesome poem Matt!

Posted: Jun 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanx peachy. Morbid, no; the images r too bright for that! haha! Cynical, yes; mocking, not really, well maybe a bit. I wondered about posting this because I knew it would get mixed responses. I wrote it a while back when I lived by the sea. it was my observation of the sun worshipers, and I wondered why can’t they get so excited about something important instead of their obsession with vanity, or need for a tan. I saw the sun as some great beast tempting them in so it could destroy there skin. I also thought of skin cancer and wondered why they had an almost manic obsession with something that could cause so much damage. Then there was the idea of the fleeting nature of it all; this madness would soon pass and people would go back to their normal lives. Very naughty of me I know, but these were my thoughts when I wrote it.
Personally I love the summer, but I can’t sunbathe, after about 5 mins I get bored, tho I can sit in the shade and read for hours. I love the beach and the sea, I really love the winter sun in Spain, when its still about 22 degrees c, and you can walk along the coast for miles, find a nice place to sit and read/write, find a nice café ect…
Anyway thanx again peachy for reading

Really good and heart felt!! i have to agree with classy peach with the fabulous hair, very much unlike you, but hey!! thats what good writers do, write in different styles eh?
Very well done!!

Posted: Jun 10, 2008

Author Comment:

thanx for a wonderful comment. U must know what beaches r like in Englad, it's not quite Spain haha. Any little bit of sun and everyone goes mental!

Oh my goodness, I am a sea worshipper who too sometimes "observes" and likes to think I am "different" to those just flocking on the beach to tan skin, make eyes at surfers or loll in the sand without appreciating the majesty and beauty of the ever rolling sea and surrounds. (But they look at me, just another sun- worshipper!) This is written very well, I love the ending. Very worthy of a post Matt! I truly enjoyed reading it.

Posted: Jun 10, 2008

Author Comment:

thanx so much for a great comment. received mixed ones but I expected it. Well I know I shouldn’t judge, while your watching someone they are watching you. It’s all about observations and opinions. Thanx for reading

don't hate me....please. but i didn't like it. for me it was hard to read. i love the beach, for i'm there every chance i get. but this one didn't rub me the right way.
SORRY, PLEASE PLEASE DON'T HATE ME :(
lexie

Posted: Jun 11, 2008

Author Comment:

ha, don't worry, i expected to offend the sun worshipers. i'm glad u read and commented. its important to know what people think, not just those who like the poem.

I am not able to identify myself with the theme. But I could 'feel' the sea shore even though the words were different.

Posted: Jun 11, 2008

Author Comment:

hey thank you so much for reading

Ok, I read it again to see if I felt differently about it and nope, still love it and I don't find it the least bit offensive. I think its beautifuly written, wonderfully orignal in phrase. and I love the different point of view.

Posted: Jun 12, 2008

Author Comment:

thanx so much Sisi! i think your my number 1 fan, and i yours. I know u like the poem and that means the world to me!! hey i love different view points, lets rock the boat a bit!!

"The Wax of Human Thought"....hmmmmm

I was smiling the whole time I was reading. Then, I went back and read it again. As I'm reading this time, this is what pops out and grabs me.

I breathed
I dreamed
I see .......
Melting
Splashing
Haunter
Chained
Spilling
Porter.......
I watch
beasts
Losing flesh
Praising
Enjoying
flesh
fleeting motionless
screaming
calling
I am.....
pulled
Song, dancer
Dancing
Foaming
Flesh
smoulder in the ashes of
A burnt out summer sun.

Sometimes I don't always get it the first time so I have to break it down like this (just thought I'd explain). I mean I understand it, but have to break it down to understand it more. I really like your writing. This is a Beauty!



Posted: Jun 16, 2008

Author Comment:

Hey thanx so much, i like how u break the poem down, it makes each word stand out or even alone which shows the whole essense of the poem



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