Save Me...from Self-Destruction

Save Me from Self-Destruction

Save me, I am dying.

Save me, from all my continuously lying.

Save me before I self-destruct,

Before I lose control.

Save me before I completely lose my mind, before I wish to take my life away…

Save me before I jinx myself and wake up to find that this is all a dream,

That the horrors and failed commitments around me disappear, and leave me in this dark void

A void filled with the horrible truth that I’ve tried to conceal,

The truth that you would stop you from trying to save me; how many times do I say,

I need to be saved.

From what? I know in my mind that the answer is there, but I know if I do find this true reason, you’ll leave.

You’ll leave me behind, and I’m alone…even though I pushed you away…I didn’t mean it. I take it all back.

I can’t. It’s still there, lingering in the air, the truth hidden by a spot bare.

Understand that I know my mishaps and mistakes, but I can’t take them back,

I can regret what I did, but it won’t change anything;

It won’t bridge the gap between you and me.

Save me from my lies, my terrible web of lives,

Take me away from the lurking twists and vines of death.

I don’t want to be here, in my mind, which has been tortured with my own thoughts of ever losing you…

Why must they come true now? Why did I have to think to myself that one day you would leave,

And found it incredulous that you finally did.

Please don’t have me, for all the things I’ve done…I wish…I had never done them in the first place.

I want you to take me back.

            Save me, and love me.