When we go cruising with your girlfriend, I don't like how you drive.
You always watch her big boobs instead of the road and we're lucky to be alive.
Keep your eyes on the damn road and not on her chest!
The cops keep pulling us over for wreckless driving and putting you under arrest.
You had to pay for a hog you hit last week and now we're going to have to eat a lot of pork.
At first you refused to pay for the hog and that farmer jabbed you in the nuts with a pitchfork.
I just learned that you've been risking our lives because of kleenex tissue in a brassiere.
You just blessed out your girlfriend and she gave you a swift kick in the rear.