Something I wrote, about feeling tainted by sorrow, like your always consumed by something....Just a thought. It's not really that personal....not as some of the other things I've post. It is me though as always I ask for your opion not your symathy. :) Thank you for hearing my voice when it seems no one else bothers....
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Submitted: Sep 12, 2008
Reads: 43
Comments: 3
Likes: 2
There’s something inside my skin
Crawling, threatening to go deeper
Digging in, tearing away
Each and everyday
There’s somethingunder my skin
I run my hands across it
Trying desperately to remove the pain
The meds aren’t enough
The needles won’t go through
My skin just too tough
There’s something under my skin
Eating away
My thoughts and joy
My stomach filling with knots
Like little bugs
Each one stands for a word you’ve said
Each one a reminder
Of the cuts that aren’t enough
I feel like dirt
Soiled by my sorrow, tainted by my hurt
There’s something under my skin
Feeding the tears
Fueling my fears
Taking a little away, here and there
It feels like slick oil running down my wrists
It makes me wonder
“What if I slip?”
I am dirt
Not worth your time
I hope you don’t mind
Me standing here
I have no where to be
I wish you wouldn’t see
The tears I shed
I wish I’d just stay in bed
Unmoving
Unheard
Dead
There’s something under my skin
Making me feel like dirt
It’s something that keeps me from saying
“I’m not hurt.”
“I’m not sad.”
It’s something that makes me wish
Something that makes me stay here
It makes me hurt, it makes me sad
I want to be dead
Because I’m dirt
Too consumed by hurt
To through with the things you’ve missed
I’m dirt, through your fingers
Spreading my pain
Because I am alone
And want you to feel it, too
Because right now I’m so close to slipping
So close to losing my fight
I’ve already lost my sight
I’ve already lost my voice
My choice......
Because I’m dirt.
Dirt
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Comments:
What is it???? You are not dirt... it is a good poem but don't you realize that you may be someone's entire universe... entire life. Please don't feel like that.
The point is: You are very eloquent when you write poetry but when it comes to speaking face to face you may not be that frank or clear just because you feel insecure or doubtful about something... As long as a clear communication won't be there,,, you may have to suffer like this only and doubts will keep heaping up.
Have faith... not the blind faith but the enlightened faith.
I hope you don't mind... i've argued with my friends in the past and i know it hurts but i REALLY do care about you and whatever happens i'll always be there...
You might be intrigued to hear such a big and impassioned speech from a mere stranger... but the question is: ARE WE REALLY STRANGERS in this common universe?
I'd have spoken more if i had time. I love this poem but at the same time i request you please don't feel like this.
-Carnation.
Posted: Sep 14, 2008
hi! sam. this reads like a case of low self esteem. when u can write so beautifully, u can't be dirt. there r high and low phases for everyone. the lows shouldn't be taken too seriously but should be worked on to build self-confidence. for u'll like urself more and learn to appreciate ur value. i'm sure one day, u'll blossom into a determined person in total control of herself. and u'll like urself very much. so, disregard these negative thoughts and and substitute them with more positive ones.
keep writing. keep blossoming. keep rolling. lol. ;-)
Posted: Sep 15, 2008
Sounds to me like depression. Although it is written in a whole new way. It has got what it takes to bring the reader your emotions. I am sorry the word "Dirt" is just too dirty here :p The poem is really good, and i can feel what you felt after fighting with your parents... keep it up.
Posted: Sep 25, 2008
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