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A child hardens to many a promise broken. View table of contents...
Submitted: Jun 12, 2008 Reads: 42 Comments: 3 Likes: 3
Snapshot the promise
as it freezes in mid flight
Before glass folds on wood
I sense your honour pull tight
The sponge of youth
firms to regular fear
Your word, your bond
not worthy of my ear
My need is inflated
my dependence dilutes
I seek cover from the words
your bow of declaration shoots
Snapshot the promise
on its downward path
Know from the past
it's best to laugh
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Wow! This is an amazing poem. The conceptual imagery here are very well done. Your words like "snapshot" "inflate" and "dilute" my particular favourites. I almost didn't notice the rhyme scheme, that's how good it was (yes, that's a compliment, haha) it helps the flow of the poem immensely.
Posted: Jun 12, 2008
Well crafted poem, confidently executed.
Posted: Jun 12, 2008
I think controverse makes all the points I would here. Great stuff!
Posted: Jul 1, 2008
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