FROM THE CORNER OF HEART
View table of contents...
Submitted: Jul 17, 2008
Reads: 88
Comments: 21
Likes: 8
says the verse of my heart written poetry
you are the cause of my victory
Says the theme of my soul written prose
You are softer than the red rose
I never said i could love you as others do
but i know i am living to love you too
why do i feel you in the first rain
why is it your thought cures my pain
why your tears make me insane
and my heart searches you, now and then
why does my dust struck eye pour
when your days turn sour
The breeze that carries your fragrance
chants on me an unknown trance
is it some kinda spell unbound
or oh! cupid is it my first love found?
Email this story |
Print Story |
Add to reading list
Comments:
Beautiful.
Its so sweet.
The feelings just flow in this poem.
I absolutley love it!
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
sweet:) there's a few typos in the last two stanzas--ur, u, wen, etc... but other than that, it's really good:)
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
don't worry about the typo's for now sheeram . content is far more important , the punctuation ,spelling etc , can easily be rectified later . i have similar trouble myself . i can write so easily with book and pen but keyboard's are all new to me .
you're poem flow's and speak's of romance , the recipient will have benn delighted to receive it .
best wishes
terry
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
I loved it!! Two thumbs way up!!
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
this is lovely Sreeram except for one line "Blood written poetry"....i did not like that line...apart from that, the poem is AWESOME except some typos...
I loved the lines...
why do i feel u in the first rain
why is it ur thought cures my pain
why your tears make me insane
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
:) It's a lovely poem.
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
I loved it. I agree with everything said above. A few typos, but other than that it was magnificent. :)
Posted: Jul 18, 2008
sonali
(not registered user)
shrii
its poem not at all
its fellins of urs heart
its not like dat.........just copy n paste
its something original..............
i will tell u when u got dhis fellings u r surely in love...............
:)
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
hi! shreeram. u r in love. so who's the lucky one for whom u r pouring ur heart out and writing lovely paean. gorgeous. lol. ;-)
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
So very sweet! I really liked it! I loved it!
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
Very sweet :] But try spelling out words such as ur [your.] Other than that, great job!
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
Beautiful.
I love your style because it is so natural :)
Well done and keep going!!
Alex
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
This is a soft and sincere, warm and heartfelt love poem. There are some really great lines, "The breeze that carries your fragrance" and I love the way you end with a question. (though we sense the answer) Your use of ryhme is quite good, the rule of thumb is, if you "force" words to make something ryhme then it will always sound that way to the reader (and won't flow as well) I think you did a great job, I will read some more when time allows.
Posted: Jul 19, 2008
this was so sweet......u did a great job!
Posted: Jul 20, 2008
awe this was sweet i loved it :)
Posted: Jul 20, 2008
i hope soome guys would write poems like this for me. it's beautiful:)
Posted: Jul 22, 2008
charu
(not registered user)
hope u rem dah made me shed few pearlz off my damn eyes...
gr8 job!
gdbless!
Posted: Jul 22, 2008
intresting indeed makes my heart yearn for my loved one and day's of old keep up the good writing
Posted: Jul 25, 2008
I love this poem. It is so beautiful, the first paragraph was my favorite, especially the last two lines of the first paragraph. They were truly heart felt lines.
Tell me, did you write this about someone you love? AS there is so much emotion in these lines. Great poem!
Megzbo-x
Posted: Jul 27, 2008
wow. Words can't tell how much what this poem is saying. Good poem
Posted: Jul 27, 2008
"why do i feel you in the first rain
why is it your thought cures my pain
why your tears make me insane"
I love those lines. Keep writing! And please keep me updated.
Posted: Aug 2, 2008
© Copyright 2008 shreeram All rights reserved. shreeram has granted theNextBigWriter, LLC non-exclusive rights to display this work on Booksie.com.
