Sometimes, I just fail to understand.
A stupid feeling is all I get,
When I think of being useless
I hate these random stuff
That pop up in my head
When I’m already trying so hard
To shut down the noise inside.
My feelings get louder as time passes
I grab my head and plead for it to quieten down
I can’t think straight- I can’t even hear myself.
Why do I have to put up with it anyway?
Empty, unfeeling advice dripping from venomous mouths
I hate it when people act smart when they’re clueless.
Perhaps it’s not even fair to be angry
I don’t know what wrong I’ve done.
Hating the world, the moronic demons in it-
And when I try to lift myself a bit,
I find the inquisitive eyes boring through me,
Reprimanding me as though I were treading a forbidden path.
Sometimes, I feel like shaking them off,
These irksome, nasty thoughts
Perhaps I’m too defensive too care.
Whatever, I give nothing to that-
Had enough of worrying about other’s opinions-
It’s time I worried about my own.
Ah, don’t get me wrong-
This is narcissism in good doses
A healthy supplement to boost one’s self-esteem
What’s wrong with that!
Smile, shoulders back, chin up
And I’m opening the door to new beginnings.