Random First Lines: Above unspoken words which line the soul,Above horrific dreams and morbid thoughts, Lives a beast,Which remains... : Poetry » Read

Welcome Visitor: Login to the siteJoin the site

True Love's Treachery

Poem By: suzanne capleton
Poetry


A poem I wrote about a girl who's been another victim of a love once true and has left her broken. @_@ View table of contents...

 

Submitted: Jun 3, 2008    Reads: 96    Comments: 17    Likes: 6   


Your voice is a venom

Your smile is a lie

Your love it has engulfed me

I've fallen a prey to your eyes

*~~*

Your words as sweet as honey

Underneath lies deceit

Your handsome frame, it hides away

The predator within

*~~*

You're a wolf in sheep's clothing

We're no different, you and I

One night of passion, several days of pain

What other torture do you have in mind?

*~~*

I've heard of your past lovers

Would I be just like them?

I can hear them from the void

Screaming at me at wits end

*~~*

They told me of your cunning

Should I heed them or not?

Come on, baby, I'm confused

I guess not for I love you a lot

*~~*

Now here I am lying

My heart is an abyss

Your reason so holy

I simply could not resist

*~~*

Your voice is a venom

I feel the poison flowing

Eating me up with remorse

*~~*

The promise you feinted

Stabbed my heart with regret

As you led your new damsel along

*~~*

I fear for her fate

For she knows you not

And the danger you've brought to her now

*~~*

I am here in the void

My heart frantic and racing

I want to shout out

"You don't know who you're facing!"

*~~*

Your voice is a venom

Your smile is a lie

Your love that once engulfed me

I'm now dying in your eyes

*~~*

Your words laced with poison

I drink it all in

I hear your angelic voice laughing

But I know, you have the devil within

*~~**~~**~~*


6

Email this story Email this story | Print Story Print Story | Add to reading list

Comments:

O_O

wowowow!!!!!
is there anything you can't do? your novel is amazing and your poetry is breathtaking!!! gah! i love you! and i'm a bit envious, haha
but wow! i must say, this was a brilliant read! i loved it so much.
great imagery and a fantastic flow. lovely work :)

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much alice... i'm rather stuck with the novel though. LoL thanks so much for reading! *hugz*

holy cow that was a long yet amazing poem! I could never write a poem that long, I'm a bit bad at them. That's why I stick with novels,lol. This showed a lot of emotion and a lot of images. It was really cool. :]
Keep it up. It was really good and had a nice flow.
*~Mandy~*

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading mandy. :D i appreciate your comment

Hm. This reminds me a lot of something that just happened in my relationship. So it hits close to home. Right through the pane glass window actually.

Well written. Very good.

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much. :)

I hope someone would invent a thing that can warn us about untrustworthy love... coz the one you'd mention, whose voice was a venom, sure is a snake. This is very good. Love it:)

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading indie. :D

Hala!!
naku, ang mga ganyang tao, iniiwan :)

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

wahahahaha... onga!

nice poem

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks aruntp. :)

Brilliant! I really like the symmetry of her ignoring the calls from the void to then being ignored herself. Another great poem!

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

Wow, thanks atwoz! glad you liked it. :)

I love the brilliant contrasts you create with your words: venom vs. smile, sweet honey vs. deceit, passion vs. pain. To me sharp contrasts like that make the poem more powerful because they give me a jolt. I liked this poem a lot!

Stephanee :)

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading stephanee! I really appreciate it. :)

I liked your poem. Really deep. Keep it up ;)

Posted: Jun 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks. :)

Hi, its good:-)

HAve posted my first chapter

Posted: Jun 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading! :) I'll see to your story as soon as I can. :)

hey ur REALLY GOOD keep writeing cuz u need to have these published to a book or something
-hailey!! :)

Posted: Jun 8, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much hailey. :D

Nice work. Keep using those strong descriptive words it really keeps the poem interesting. My only suggestion do not use A LOT personally I find it a poor descriptive phrase.
I will read you novel being that is more my style I imagine it will be fantasy based like mine so cool.

Posted: Jun 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks. :D

i liked it!

Posted: Jun 10, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks!

I loved it. I can so relate to that one. Your a great writer. Keep it up.

Posted: Jun 24, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks ayame. :)

Wow this is such a great poem; maybe even one of the best ive read so far. Keep up the good work ;)

Posted: Jun 28, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks. :D

amazing poem! I loved it!

Posted: Jun 29, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks kirsten. :)

great work!

Posted: Jun 30, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks. :)



Add Your Comments:

Your Name:

Spam protection control::

© Copyright 2008 suzanne capleton All rights reserved. suzanne capleton has granted theNextBigWriter, LLC non-exclusive rights to display this work on Booksie.com.

Add to Reading List
Become a fan
Email this story Email this story
Read/Write Reviews Read/Write Reviews
Print Story Print Story



Other writing by suzanne capleton Rhythm of a Broken Heart Ramorgra: The Grounds for Revenge Dare I Speak Your Name More..



Tags

Love, Poetry, Life, Death, Poem, Romance, Pain, Fantasy, Hope, Sad, Sex, God, Horror, Hate, War, Humor, Hurt, Sadness, Loss, Dark, Fiction, Depression, Heart, Family, Faith.

About | News | Contact | Your Account | TheNextBigWriter | Advertise

© 2008 TheNextBigWriter, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Terms under which this service is provided to you. Privacy Policy.