True Love's Treachery - Poetry Poetry - love, heart, broken

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True Love's Treachery

Poem By: suzanne capleton
Poetry

Tags: broken, heart, poison, true, love, treachery

A poem I wrote about a girl who's been another victim of a love once true and has left her broken. @_@ View table of contents...

Submitted: Jun 3, 2008 Reads: 96 Comments: 17 Likes: 6

Your voice is a venom

Your smile is a lie

Your love it has engulfed me

I've fallen a prey to your eyes

*~~*

Your words as sweet as honey

Underneath lies deceit

Your handsome frame, it hides away

The predator within

*~~*

You're a wolf in sheep's clothing

We're no different, you and I

One night of passion, several days of pain

What other torture do you have in mind?

*~~*

I've heard of your past lovers

Would I be just like them?

I can hear them from the void

Screaming at me at wits end

*~~*

They told me of your cunning

Should I heed them or not?

Come on, baby, I'm confused

I guess not for I love you a lot

*~~*

Now here I am lying

My heart is an abyss

Your reason so holy

I simply could not resist

*~~*

Your voice is a venom

I feel the poison flowing

Eating me up with remorse

*~~*

The promise you feinted

Stabbed my heart with regret

As you led your new damsel along

*~~*

I fear for her fate

For she knows you not

And the danger you've brought to her now

*~~*

I am here in the void

My heart frantic and racing

I want to shout out

"You don't know who you're facing!"

*~~*

Your voice is a venom

Your smile is a lie

Your love that once engulfed me

I'm now dying in your eyes

*~~*

Your words laced with poison

I drink it all in

I hear your angelic voice laughing

But I know, you have the devil within

*~~**~~**~~*

6

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Comments:

Alice Oiseau

O_O

wowowow!!!!!
is there anything you can't do? your novel is amazing and your poetry is breathtaking!!! gah! i love you! and i'm a bit envious, haha
but wow! i must say, this was a brilliant read! i loved it so much.
great imagery and a fantastic flow. lovely work :)

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much alice... i'm rather stuck with the novel though. LoL thanks so much for reading! *hugz*

NocturnalMuse

holy cow that was a long yet amazing poem! I could never write a poem that long, I'm a bit bad at them. That's why I stick with novels,lol. This showed a lot of emotion and a lot of images. It was really cool. :]
Keep it up. It was really good and had a nice flow.
*~Mandy~*

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading mandy. :D i appreciate your comment

Socioparasite

Hm. This reminds me a lot of something that just happened in my relationship. So it hits close to home. Right through the pane glass window actually.

Well written. Very good.

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much. :)

indiefreak

I hope someone would invent a thing that can warn us about untrustworthy love... coz the one you'd mention, whose voice was a venom, sure is a snake. This is very good. Love it:)

Posted: Jun 3, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading indie. :D

Punishment

Hala!!
naku, ang mga ganyang tao, iniiwan :)

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

wahahahaha... onga!

aruntp

nice poem

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks aruntp. :)

atwoz

Brilliant! I really like the symmetry of her ignoring the calls from the void to then being ignored herself. Another great poem!

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

Wow, thanks atwoz! glad you liked it. :)

Stephanee

I love the brilliant contrasts you create with your words: venom vs. smile, sweet honey vs. deceit, passion vs. pain. To me sharp contrasts like that make the poem more powerful because they give me a jolt. I liked this poem a lot!

Stephanee :)

Posted: Jun 4, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading stephanee! I really appreciate it. :)

brauweiler141

I liked your poem. Really deep. Keep it up ;)

Posted: Jun 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks. :)

RodneyF

Hi, its good:-)

HAve posted my first chapter

Posted: Jun 6, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks for reading! :) I'll see to your story as soon as I can. :)

BrokenHeartsNeverHeal

hey ur REALLY GOOD keep writeing cuz u need to have these published to a book or something
-hailey!! :)

Posted: Jun 8, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks so much hailey. :D

MTCuzino

Nice work. Keep using those strong descriptive words it really keeps the poem interesting. My only suggestion do not use A LOT personally I find it a poor descriptive phrase.
I will read you novel being that is more my style I imagine it will be fantasy based like mine so cool.

Posted: Jun 9, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks. :D

kevin smith

i liked it!

Posted: Jun 10, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks!

Ayame

I loved it. I can so relate to that one. Your a great writer. Keep it up.

Posted: Jun 24, 2008

Author Comment:

Thanks ayame. :)

Ant

Wow this is such a great poem; maybe even one of the best ive read so far. Keep up the good work ;)

Posted: Jun 28, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks. :D

Kirsten Rain

amazing poem! I loved it!

Posted: Jun 29, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks kirsten. :)

Adrianne Gray

great work!

Posted: Jun 30, 2008

Author Comment:

thanks. :)

© Copyright 2008 suzanne capleton All rights reserved. suzanne capleton has granted theNextBigWriter, LLC non-exclusive rights to display this work on Booksie.com.

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Other writing by suzanne capleton Rhythm of a Broken Heart Ramorgra: The Grounds for Revenge Dare I Speak Your Name More..

Tags

Love, Poetry, Life, Death, Poem, Romance, Pain, Fantasy, Hope, Sad, Sex, God, Horror, Hate, War, Humor, Hurt, Sadness, Loss, Dark, Fiction, Depression, Heart, Family, Faith.

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