Moon Cry

I have discovered something.

What I feel for him does not wax and wane.

No, it is always there, this bittersweet ache.

This ache of knowing I found what I’ve been looking for, but I cannot have it.

I can only be the shadow in the background, watching and waiting for the ones I love to smile in their happiness, with the ones they choose to give their love to.

Yes, it makes me happy to see them happy, but it also hurts me deeply that the one can never be me.

I can’t ever seem to be more than a friend.

I am like the glow of the moon, on the waters of the ocean, as two lovers kiss.

Yes, they appreciate me every now and then, but most of the time, everything fades away but the two of them.

And I, I am condemned to watch from afar, and dance upon the waves.

I want to be touched, and yet no one can ever get close enough, except the one I choose to touch with my silver light, as he steps from the shadows.

She soon follows, and I still shine, from the background…I begin to fade away, but still I shine, giving him my silver light, as he woos her on the distant shore. Damned, and blessed all at once.

Damned, never to shine with my own light.

Damned to the background, and to dance upon the waves.

Yet, still…am I blessed?

Blessed with his presence, blessed to be able to be there for him, even when she is not.

Blessed to see him, as his heart slowly chooses light over darkness, almost without his bidding.

Blessed and damned am I.

Blessed and damned with things I thought long dead, but he awakened them, as he looked to me, and heard my mournful whispers, that no one else seemed to hear, or merely didn’t care.

Blessed and damned by my own choice to stay silent in my feelings, and help him win her heart.

Blessed and damned to shine down upon him with hopeful, silver light, just as a bittersweet blade called Unconditional Love pierces my heart