I sit there, questioning, a running line of thought
I wonder how I can't grasp the thing I sought
It's there, I know, I can tell, it's just how?
How do I see it? Or can it be allowed?
How can I turn my back on everyone?
How canI become the else of someone?
How can one part become two?
How can I give everything to you?
The questions are there, but never voiced
My lips are dry butmy curiosity is moist
To take a chance, without looking back
It's caution I keep, but control I lack
So they spring to mind, once again
The thoughts surround me with pain
An aching. Myhurting heart
Make it stop. Cry. Make it start.
The first night I cried myself into a dream
The second I lay awake, so it seemed
The third, I don't even recall
Of thinking or doing anything at all
I suppose then I must conclude
That the ropes swing, like my mood
One moment I am consciously blue
The next I am red, in love with you
Then the questions, you know what they do
They taunt and haunt and flaunt you
Is it so easy to make up a name?
To make up a person, do it all over again?
Is it easy to lie, to get what you desire?
I've never tried, never will, i'm not a liar
I'm confused and I inside something's dying
You're bemused, though you see my crying
I'm not a person who looks for sympathy
Nor even, what they call empathy
In optimism, I assuredly believe
Though you could say, I am perhaps naive?
I don't really suppose I know
What the real world holds
Love or life, my soul is sold
And so I question. And get no where.
Too much caution. Too much care.
I unwillingly breathe. But willingly live.
Why am I always the one, that has to give?