Broken Sorrow

I lay here...

Wide Awake

Thinking of all the people who feel sorry for me...

I dont want their pity

I dont want anything from them...Nothing AT ALL!

I hate...absolutely hate all the pain I have caused them

It makes me feel sorry for them and I feel sorry for doing this to them

I almost feel selfish for doing this...

I feel selfish for taking this away from them...From Myself...

I didnt even give talking about it a chance

I didnt give anything that would help me a chance...

I didnt think anything could help me...I felt worthless, helpless, hopeless, guilty, selfish, terrible, confused..

I felt like a complete and utter mess!

I felt like no one cared!

I never knew how to talk about things that were bothering me...I still dont

I shall always have this voice in thee back of my mind...its gonna be there forever!

Its never going to leave me alone...

I feel like I will never completely heal or get better...or believe in myself...

I've ruined everything anyone has ever thought of me...They'll never think of me as the same girl...

I have kept this secret for so long...why did it just have to get away from me?

Does this feeling of pain, sorrow, helplessness...does it ever go away?

I wish someone...just one person knew exactley how I felt...):

But there never will be...No two people ever feel the same...I know that for sure...