this is my best one :)

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Poem By: XnewtX
Poetry

Tags: my life, failure, screw up, life, sumed up, death, blood

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Submitted: Jun 1, 2008 Reads: 53 Comments: 5 Likes: 2

i not to sure on the start but here it goes:

************************************************

If you were to think of words
that best describe you
those words for me are,
failure,
screw up

I'm sorry I'm here
sorry I couldn't do it
couldn't end it
sorry I am a failure
sorry I am a screw up
sorry I am here
sorry I’m a waste of air
sorry
sorry for everything

I wish I could turn back time
really I do
untangle all the mess
and I wish this ending
I wish it quick
really quick!

so I just;
slit my wrist
slit them quick
slit them deep

so I will
not be able to service
not able to live
not able to pull though!

I was a waste
I was a screw up
I was a failure.......

......I was alive

but now
I'm dead
dead as a rock
cold as a stone

thanks for reading

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Comments:

Trainman238

WOW this is really good and it really hits me deep seeing what I just told you about yesterday with what I did (you know what I'm talking about)...
This is a really GREAT poem... :)

Posted: Jun 1, 2008

XBrokenHeartedX

This really was easy for me to connect too.

I'm sorry I'm here
sorry I couldn't do it
couldn't end it
sorry I am a failure
sorry I am a screw up
sorry I am here
sorry I’m a waste of air
sorry
sorry for everything

I really liked this stanza. This is the kind of stuff I write about in my journal. I always feel like I'm a mess up in my life, like I am just a waist. That everybody would have been better off if I hadn't been born, and that a lot of messes or mistakes that had taken place would be gone. Also:

I wish I could turn back time
really I do
untangle all the mess
and I wish this ending
I wish it quick
really quick!

The first sentence really caught a hold me, and tugged on that one spot that has been irritating me for so long. This unlocked it. "I wish I could turn back time." I do wish that sometimes, that everything was always my fault. I just wanted everything to go back to what it had been; or that I had never been there at all the begin with. This poem really hit me xnewtx, and you've completely made me think about everything smoldering in my life. This is truly one of your best poems, and definitely one of my favorites. Great job:)

Posted: Jun 2, 2008

XnewtX

thanks :) im glad you liked it

Posted: Jun 8, 2008

foreverflorence

wow its really good.... i can relate quite a lot

Posted: Jun 15, 2008

lemonluv

this was heka deep. i really liked it. it's also good that a lot of poeple can relate to it one time in their lives or another. i give you a round of applause fr bein really relateable! its one of the best things in a poem, to me, that it can relate to other people's lives. bravo! =)i relate to this sometimes too.
~Lemon

Posted: Jun 18, 2008