The Miles that Dissolve Us

Love- I forbid it this time

He’s too far away

How would I be enough from way over here?

I scarcely know him, anyway

He’s a wreck, yet so am I

A perfect match

Or so you’d think

Separate

But you can’t soothe fire with more fire

And I would be just that

I couldn’t do that to him.

I wouldn’t be enough to bandage his arms,

Or detoxify him from what he does to himself

I wouldn’t be enough to take care of his heart

For I am only fourteen.

I ache when I think about it though

He’s everything I always wanted

Everything I dream of

Then what am I, to him?

Just a friend- if that, even.

Would he feel the same as I do?

Just to grasp some sort of love would be enough for me

To feel any amount of admiration submerge into my bloodstream

Then perhaps what I search for is not to take care of someone

But to have someone take care of me

To brighten my future

To chase away the nightmares and the guilt

To reassure me of light

And to cover my scars

Who would want to take care of this mess?