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Just a brief account of how I have been feeling lately

Submitted:Nov 16, 2008    Reads: 130    Comments: 4    Likes: 1   

Perhaps I was not entirely clear
When I confessed what I did
Perhaps I was facing inward
Instead of facing outward
Perhaps I was looking down
Instead of looking up
Perhaps I have not been honest
When I say what I say
Perhaps I have not been just
When I do what I do
Perhaps I have not really
Been living for you
Perhaps I am still selfish
Instead of being selfless
Perhaps I am still angry
Instead of being joyful
Perhaps I have not changed
But merely stayed the same
See, when I look inside myself,
I do not see the new person
That others seem to see
Rather, I see a deep, dark pit
The same pit that has been there
Since I can remember
Perhaps I have not given all to you
But rather kept some for myself
Perhaps I still cling to my past
Instead of laying it down
And moving forward
Perhaps I not yet placed
My full trust in you
Perhaps I am still afraid
To hand over the controls
And let someone else take the wheel
But apparently my way
Is not the right way
Clearly what I doing is not
What you would have me do
And so perhaps I will just, simply,
Give it all up to you
Perhaps I will lay it all down at your feet
Perhaps I will place my fullest trust in you
Perhaps I will try something new


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