What happen between us? You were my best and only true friend. Few could see the real me. But you saw. You knew me better than I knew myself. We spent so many years together but always apart. You never said it but I felt it. The look in your eyes told me everyday how much you wanted me. Was it just my imagination?
My day brightens when you're around. Your smell, your silly laugh, and all those quirky things you do make me remember you. The way you touch my shoulder makes me nervous. The way you playfully poke my tummy makes me blush. My heart races whenever you sit close to me. We watched scary movies and I yearned for your hand that never touched me. Keep me close. Protect me with your strong confidence.
We teased each other in front of everyone. Did they know what we really wanted to show? Remember our pinky-swear? It's broken now. Just like our bond. Yes, I wanted to bond with you, though I'd never admit it. Whatever it was, I needed it. My life depended on it. Why did you run away?
I never had any conditions. There were never any expectations. Everyone thought it was about sex. Why does everything have to be about sex? Is it possible to love someone unconditionally? I was happy just being with you, walking, talking, and dreaming of the future. Now my dreams are nightmares.
Maybe I asked for too much. Maybe I got carried away. I'm not perfect and neither are you. I never wanted perfect. I just wanted you. Still, was it too much to ask to be your friend? The games we played, the jokes we made, should be enough for me.
But it wasn't. Cause deep down inside, I wanted something more. I wanted something I couldn't have. It required us to be close physically. The one thing I wanted, needed, craved, was your kiss… a kiss that never was.
Love not forgotten,