Opening up is harder than I could imagine. I had tried to tell this story before and things didn't turn out so well. Cristie's eyes were pearing into mine. The memories of Allen Sped through my mind as i told the story out loud for the first time. I saw myself sitting in the middle school desk pearing at a handson boy. Soft brown hair and those light brownish green eyes. I remembered the feeling deep in the pit of my stomoch. That tumbling sensation. "He was beautiful." My voice was weak and barely audible. I thought my self back as i comtinued telling the story. I watched the boy from a far for weeks, but one day i had no choice but to be close to him. "He became my englist partner." I remembered sitting in class day after day gazing into his eyes and ignoring my tearch, and then having to copy the tests. I remembered sitting in the hard library chair, after the book fair, as Allen sat next to me. It was raining outsede, and a girl came running in the library doors. That was the first time Allen called me his friend. "He introdused me to her, Mellonie, His BFF." I felt another tear roll down my face.
The story took a turn once Allen and i started going steady. I had remembered falling in love with him and this was the part i always got stuck at. The part where my face swelled up. The part where i begin to scream. My hands were shaking and i couldn't spit out the thoughts in my words. Cristie held my hand, "It's ok. Tell me the rest darling." At that moment my voice was loud and strong.
"I've never loved anyone before! He is the first! I shouldn't love him anymore though, cause he hurt me! But i can't not love him, it won't go away!" I buried my face in her shoulders. I felt a tear fall on my head from her face. She let me sit in her room till the end of the day. And as i left the room faces glared at me. Eyes that knew. Everyone knew. And i was stupid!