I could feel Tuckers hands moving down my body before I felt them move to my breasts. I couldn't believe I was here, laying on Tucker's bed, my shirt up to my neck my whole upper body to his view. Tucker hasn't pulled his lips off mine till this moment in time. He stared at me. He was looking over my exposed body. "Beautiful." He whispered before putting his lips back on mine.
"Tucker wait." I gasped pulling my lips away from his. "Please wait." I closed my eyes trying to catch my breath. Tucker pulled back sitting on the bed.
"What did I do? Did I do something wrong?" I shook my head.
"No, I guess I can't."
"I'm sorry." He backed up from me as I sat up.
"No, no. It's not you." I pulled my top down blushing.
"But." He looked up at me.
"I'm not to have sex. It's not you. I'm not ready with anyone. I shit first time." He stared at me.
"But you enjoyed it?" He asked confused. I fell back on his pillows.
"God I enjoyed it so much. But the only problem is I'm just not ready." He looked at me before looking down at himself. "I'm really sorry Tucker. I didn't mean to lead you on. I," I took a deep breath. "I understand if don't want to go out with me." I sighed looking my eyes. Tucker pressed his lips to mine again making my eyes open. He smiled at me.
"You got to be kidding me if you think I wouldn't want to do this again your crazy. Maybe you're not ready now but I'm will to wait. I'll wait as long as I have to." He kissed me again gentler this time. "Alright?" I nodded.
"Thank you." I bit my lip at him. He nodded at me smiling.
"I think I should take a cold shower now." He smiled at me rubbing his thigh. I looked down before blushing again.
"I'm sorry." I got off the bed. He shook his head.
"Don't be I get them all the time. This one would be one of the hardest I've had." He swallowed closing his eyeing.
"I should get back to my room." He nodded at me.
"Probably a good idea." He smiled at me as I bit my lip before exiting his room and almost running to mine throwing my body on the bed and burying my head in the soft pillows….
The next couple of days were full of fun for the boys. Nic and I not that much. We went shopping for food and she dragged me clothes shopping too. It was torcher for me but we got it done in only 4 hours. Nic and I came into the house putting the bags down on the floor. "Was that so bad?" Nic asked me putting her hands on her hips.
"Yes it was terrible." I sighed rubbing my red hands. The guys looked over the couch at us.
"How was shopping?" Ben asked as I gave him a dead took. "That bad?" Nic slapped me.
"Come on Carson shut up." She laughed.
"I didn't say anything." I smiled innocently at her. She shook her head at me. I shrugged.
"Carson?" I looked over at Tucker as he sat on the couch looking at me.
"You have a box. The guys wanted to open it but I told them not to." He pointed to a big box on the kitchen table. "We really want to know what's in it too." He smiled at me innocently. I put the rest of the bags down and walked over to the box as the guys following me. "What do you think it is?" He asked me wrapping his arms around my waist.
"I have no idea at all." I shrugged taking my keys out of my pocket and pull the keychain pocket knife my Dad got me to protect myself. I flipped it open and pressed the blade to the tape making it cut and brake. All the guys were watching the box as I opened it.
"What's in it Carson?" Nic asked pushing Liam out of the way. I pulled out an old ratty looking comforter before smiling and hugging it. "What is that?"
"My old blanket from when I lived with my Dad. My mom wanted to burn it but he promised he wouldn't let her." I hugged it close smelling it. It smelled like home. A home I haven't been to in so long. "Home." I smiled to myself. I looked at the blanket again. All the holes I had in it that told a story were covered, patched up. I loved it. I put the blanket over the chair and looked back into the box. I pulled out a letter and smiled to myself again.
My Lightning McQueen,
I talked to your father the other day and it got me thinking of you. I do miss you Carson no matter what your mother says. You are my step daughter even if I can't legally adopt you since your Mother does not want me to have a connection to you. I just want you to know I did a adopt you. Maybe not legally but in my heart you are my daughter.
I was going through the attic because your father and I are moving to a bigger house since the baby is almost here. I put a picture of him in the bottom of the box. It's in an envelope with 'Jamie James' written on it. Do you like the name? We are going to call him JJ for short. I can't wait for him to be born.
As I was saying I have been on semi-bed rest until JJ is born because he doesn't want me to work yet so here I am. Stuck in the house. But it's okay since I need to pack up and get the house ready while your Dad's away. Well I was cleaning the attic the other day and found a box deep in there labeled with your name. I hope you don't mind that I went through it. Well I found the blanket in it. I remember your Dad telling me it was your favorite so I sew up all the holes in it with some scraps of old t-shirts of your Dad's. It was his idea to do it. He said you would love it even more if I did. Don't worry I washed them clean.
There was a lot more in the box and I found a second box too. I have all of the stuff still. I took the boxes down stairs as I didn't know if you wanted to keep them or if your Dad wanted to. I'll have to wait to talk to him first. Well I found a bunch of old photos too. You were the cutest baby.
Well I know your birthday is in a couple of weeks so I talked to your father about your present. We talked about how we didn't like that we couldn't talk to you when we want since you a crap phone with your Mom. Well that's different now. Happy Birthday Lightning. We choose this one because it had a lot of room on it for whatever you wanted as well as holds over 3,500 songs on it! I know your iPod broke and you borrowed Caleb's iPod for the summer since he was planning on getting a new one. He also said you would love this since you talked about it with him.
If you don't like it Baby it's fine. We understand because we haven't seen you in so long. I hope that changes. You're my first daughter. Even if your father and I have a daughter I know will always be his Baby Girl. I understand that and I hope you understand that I want to have you in our lives. I wish it was different but this is life and we change it. I programmed the phone so you have the house, my cellphone, your Dad's for when he gets home, My father he might want to call just to talk to his Granddaughter, your grandparents home and cells, and Caleb in case you need to talk to him. He knows your number.
I hope to hear from you soon. I miss you. I miss hearing from you. Don't forget to call. I love you my Lightning McQueen. Stay Safe this summer.
I love you Carson,
I folded the note and put it on the table as the guys stared into the box. Nic looked at it asking me silently if she could read it. I nodded at her as she picked it up opening it reading what I did. Right where I picked up the note was a perfectly wrapped box with a heart sticker on it and a blue ribbon wrapped around it. Tucker watched me holding me. I looked at him the emotion running through my veins from the sweet words Sarah wrote on the letter. He laid his head on my shoulder and nodded his chin towards the box. "Open it." He whispered rubbing the skin on my hip calming me down. I picked up the box and unwrapped the box gently. I could feel the tears forming in my eyes as I stared at the brand new iPhone. I closed my eyes as the tear fell down my cheek. Nic looked up from the letter.
"Who's Sarah?" She asked. I never could really talk about my Dad because it made me sad that I didn't get to him enough.
"Sarah's my step Mom. She and my Dad eloped about 4 years back. My Mom has a deal with the school that I'm not allowed to talk to her or my dad." I couldn't stop the tears from falling. "I miss him and her. She was the only Mom I could have ever known." Tucker held me tighter.
"Don't worry Carson. Now you'll get to talk to her and your Dad." I nodded silently as the tears fell.
"How many gigabytes is it?" Ben asked. I turned the box around as my tears stopped. I was thankful he said that. It made the pain stop.
"16GB." I opened the box and smiled at the post-it-note that was stuck on the back of the phone that was facing forward. 'Happy Birthday Lightning' was written in her handwriting. I picked the phone out of the box and clicked the button to turn it on. I smiled weakly as a picture of the three of us came up as the background. I looked up.
"Excuse me I have to go call her." I sniffled walking to the back door and walking out it hitting 'home' from my contacts.