.................. I walked to the side of the stage when I was
showered and changed. I was looking more for Lukas than anything
else, I was irritated just by the mention of her name and the
fact Lukas was talking to her about something.
"I see Chris" Ryan called out in a sing song voice Chad and the
others looked round
"Hey Chris you poached Chad before you need to get your ass out
here" Dan called from the drums I shook my head.
"Guys she won't come out I think she needs a little
encouragement" Chad looked out into the crowd and started
chanting my name as Dan started to bang the bass The stage
manager held out my ear pieces and my micro phone to me I took
them and stepped out onto the stage to cheering and shouting
"Watching how to do it right" Mike laughed
"Something like that old man" I teased. I stopped thinking of
Mari until I looked at Chad and I wanted to cry. He frowned at me
and tipped his head.
"So considering you took one of our songs I think we take one of
yours" Chad forced a smile.
"That's fine" Mike walked over to me and put his arm round me in
what to most would look like a casual hug but I knew by the
slight rub on my neck he saw I was upset as easily as his brother
"I say Love song" Ryan chimed in "Dan needs a rest, and I think
Mike could do with it as well"
"Hey" Mike looked at him as the crowd was laughing.
"So you want me here as well or can I go for a break?" Chad held
up his hands
"I think Chris and I can handle it" I looked to the side of the
stage Lukas was there
"No I think Chad should push himself" Ryan looked at me
"Okay" I sat on a stool between Chad and Ryan both of them with
"Wow this feel wired" Chad nudged me with his knee
"You're good" I smiled at him weakly" he and Ryan started to
play. Just the beginning of the song was already causing the
tears to form both of then knew what this song meant to me. I
started to sing by the third line my voice was beginning to crack
both Ryan and Chad started to sing to cover for me. I couldn't
get through the song.
"Well that was emotional" Ryan hugged me before Chad took his
chance to actually touch me on stage in front of 50,000 people
"What's going on?" he whispered in my ear
"Lukas was talking to Mari" Chad's face dropped as I stepped away
from him I held out my hands and shrugged He pulled me back to
him his mouth near my ear
"I love you" he murmured I just nodded as I waved at the crowd
and headed off the stage Lukas was with Dan and Mike.
"Sorry Chris" Dan rubbed my arms I didn't mean to get you on
"It's okay" I wiped my eyes on my hands I saw Alfie and Kerion
standing back a little as Lukas seemed to disappeared again.
"What was that?" Alfie hugged me
"I don't know something's happening again?" I shook my head as
Nickelback started playing the last song of their set "I swear
I'm heading for a damn breakdown… I just literally burst into
tears in front of an arena of people…"
"Lets go raid the beer in the guys room" Kerion kinked his
fingers with mine 'I feel a drunken night coming on"
We were sitting in Nickelbacks dressing room the three of us
already well into the second twelve pack, the door opened and the
guys walked in apart from Chad, I got up Mike put his arm in
front of me
"Let Lukas talk to him"
"What's going on?" Kerion looked at the guys
"We don't' know we just know if Mari's involved it's not going to
be good" Ryan took a beer and took a drink
"Why does it feel we have two days peace and quiet and then all
hell breaks loose again" I chewed my lip "Oh crap we're all
supposed to be going out with Pete and his date"
"Pete won't mind you not being there" Alfie looked at me the door
opened and Chad walked in looking pissed.
'You okay" Mike looked at his brother
"No" Chad walked to the showered and slammed the door. Seeing him
hurting angry and vulnerable trigged something in me
"Okay my brother will punch me if I go after him" Mike looked at
me "You might do well to let him calm down"
"Mike I've be beaten, cut, kicked, raped and punched by a guy
twice the size of Chad" all the fear was gone from my voice "I
know he won't hurt me I know he loves me… don't worry about me" I
kissed his cheek and walked into the bathroom Chad was sitting on
the floor of the shower still in his clothes the water streaming
over him.. I reached in and turned off the water
"Chris I just" I gt on my knees next to him and held his face in
my hands tears were in hs eyes "I can't do this to you…"…………