……….. I wrapped the towel round me and reached into the fridge and got out a beer.
About to start grilling" Mike smiled at me
"You're not going anywhere" I pointed at him with the bottle as Angela and Chad walked in
"Dude what happened to you?' Mike smirked at Chad
"He got served" Dawson walked in and grabbed a pile of plates and walked back out Chad Looked at me
"So anyone want to tell me why Avalon thinks she's going to be in trouble for asking NeverWest to play her party?" I leant on the counter and looked at the three of them standing there "And why have neither of you said something about it you know damn well we'll do it without a second thought" I put the bottle down.
"We didn't think you'd want to play at a ten year olds birthday" Mike shrugged
"She's family Micheal I might only be her aunt by marriage but I know what it means for a little girl to have something special on her birthday and damn it shouldn't you be bending over backwards to make her dreams come true" I poked him in the chest as his wife smirked at me nodding in agreement "YOU rock as a dad Don't' fuck it up" I turned and looked at Chad "and you why wouldn't' you ask me" He looked down and then looked at Mike and Angela
"Can you give us a few minutes?"
"Sure" Mike picked up the tray of meat and walked out of the door Angela was holding open
"So" I tipped my head and looked at Chad "You love that little girl I know you do so why won't…"
"Because it kills you to be around kids" he snapped walking over to the fridge I stalled and looked at him "I see it in your eyes when you pick up Ryan's kids" I crossed to the sink and looked outside "How am I supposed to deal with the fact it kills you even though I know you don't want kids yet" he put his hands on my arms "I was going to skip the party and take you away for the weekend… I hate that you can't have what the others have and I can't make it better" I pushed his hands off my arms and faced him
"Did you ever even give me the chance to say 'no' I wouldn't do it? Do you not realize Avalon is the same age as my own sister and I don't' get to see her as often as I see my niece. I walked passed him to the doorway to the hall "I'm not fucking brooding for a kid Chad, I miss my sister hell of a lot because her life was almost as fucked up as mine was. I won't lie to you I like holding a baby and Ryan's kids are special because they're as good as family… I know I can't have children, I'll never have them, but I'm not the one that seems fucking hung up on it" I swallowed hard "You know maybe you're the one that's getting broody and wants a baby Chad, Think about it and wheather you want to be with a woman that can't give you what the others have" I pushed off the wall "I told Avalon we'll do her party" He looked at me "I think you'd better sleep in the guest room tonight"
I picked up my car keys and walked out of the door dropping the towel and grabbing the silk Sarong I'd gotten in Bali. I wrapped it round me as Chad ran round the side of the house. I unlocked the door to Mac he put his hand on the door as I got in
"Chris come on" He crouched down
"Think about what you want Chad Because I'm getting so many mixed signals from you right now" I felt tears in my eyes "I love you but right now I don't like you very much… I'm not glass I won't break, hell enough people have tried to do that" I shook my head "I need to get out of here for a while" He got up and closed the door as I started the engine even the purr of the McLaren did nothing to calm me as I pulled out of the drive and onto the highway…………..